Gossip Girl: OMFG

Hey there, Upper East Siders. Gossip Girl’s back and ---

Erm. Sorry. Can’t help it.

Yes, Gossip Girl’s baaaaack! Bringing the yogurt, the name-dropping and the panicked phone calls. Oh, the drama. Jenny’s in! Jenny’s out! Jenny’s in again! Blair has to suck it up and be nice! No, wait, she’s a bitch with a plan!

One of the things I like about this show is that it uses standard teen-drama fare, but things don’t necessarily turn out the standard way. It’s something that won my affection with the Serena/Nate/Blair/Dan hotel room kerfuffle in The Wild Brunch and it happened again last night. If this were The OC, Jenny would have managed to sneak that red dress back into Rich Mom’s closet in the nick of time, thanks to Nate or Dan or Eric creating a painfully bad diversion. In GG’s world, Jenny gets busted. And just when you think she’s turned into social roadkill, she turns around and pimps Nate out and --- BOOM. She’s back in the game. It’s twisted and I love it.

New York Magazine has a lengthy cover story this week declaring GG the “Best. Show. Ever.” The cover itself is lame, because the cast-members-in-bed-in-underwear thing has been done to death and because little Taylor Momsen is fourteen frickin’ years old and without her pants. Anyway. The article touches on how the GG kids never really face consequences for their misdeeds, like when Bart saved Serena’s ass by donating money to Constance Billard. And then last night, Jenny stole twice and was facing all kinds of trouble. But once she figured out how to work the situation, she got off scot-free. (And, by the way, why wouldn’t the lady from the dress shop be hunting Jenny down to press charges, when she was so obviously the thief?) So maybe it’s true that these kids get away with everything. In the real world, that’s despicable. But in this fluffy, candy, fantasy world, it’s awesome.

Speaking of inappropriate sexuality, have you seen these OMFG (or OMG) ads for the show? And the clips where The CW has cut together every mention of sex on the show ever and put them on a loop, so someone’s saying “Sexsexsexsexsex?” OMFG, indeed. There’s not that much sex on the show, really. It’s more implied than overt. And yet they’re trying to market GG like it’s The Real World: Las Vegas.

But the inappropriateness surrounding Serena last night was pretty great. Even though you’d have to be living in a cave not to know that those mystery gifts were coming from Georgina Sparks, not Chuck. I never came across Georgina in the books, so I only know what’s been teased in magazines and interviews. Even though it was totally transparent to use Chuck as a red herring, the escalating gifts were a great way to hype up Georgina’s arrival. Can’t you just imagine Serena and Georgina’s coke- and booze-addled sexcapades all over Manhattan? Again, I say… awesome. As much as I was dreading Michelle Trachtenberg joining the show, the next episode looks like an amazing bitch-off and a hearty taste of Serena’s bad-girl days.

That said, I worry for my beloved Dan and Serena. The thing about GG filming on the streets of New York City is that there are always spoilery paparazzi pics coming out. Like the one from the other day where Dan was making out with… Georgina. That is not cool. Dream sequence, please!

Though I suppose if Dan and Serena are going to be New York’s Seth and Summer, we’re going to have to get used to them breaking up every five minutes.

Can this bad girl stay good? Will Queen B ever regain her throne? Will N’s haircut continue to stand in for a personality? Stay tuned. Until next time, XOXO.