Monday, April 30, 2007

ER: A "Dedicated" John Wells? What's that?

Currently, there is a full page article in TV Guide dedicated to ER and the upcoming episode that will feature the wedding of Abby and Luka. This is also known as the episode that makes me want to vomit. I will be the first to admit that I know basically nothing about this show anymore, seeing as how I haven't bothered to watch more than maybe five episodes in the past several years. If even that many episodes, really. But that doesn't change the fact that I know Abby and Luka pretty damn well, and I will forever hate them together.

I love that Abby finally had a baby, because she deserves that happiness and (let's face it) her becoming a mother was always predestined since the moment her own mom told her she needed to stop being afraid of the good things in life before she misses out on the greatness of marriage and motherhood. But still! The fact that it had to become a reality with Luka, of all people, makes me ill. I would have rather it been with Jake (Remember him? Aw.) or some other random dude we hardly knew. Never Luka. Never.

It's hard for me to believe that Abby and Luka would have ever stayed together, much less gotten engaged, were it not for her becoming pregnant. Their entire love story has always been a sham to me. I'm sure that I'm currently alienating a good deal of readers right now, seeing as I'm more than well aware of the battle between Carby and Luby fans - but I don't care at all. I don't buy what Luby is selling. The first time they were together was a big effing joke. He told her she's not that pretty and not that special. I'm sorry, but I wouldn't exactly be giving him any second chances in my lifetime if I were her.

What infuriates me the most about the article in TV Guide is that one of the last statements made declares that John Wells says he is completely dedicated to the Abby/Luka love story and plans of having them go the distance. That's not word for word, but it's close enough and it's still the same "pisses me off beyond belief" gist of it all.

First and foremost, it's not exactly a secret that Goran is leaving. He has made it perfectly clear that he intends (as of right now, at least. Please let it stay that way.) to do no more than five episodes next season. Maura has also said that next season will be her last, but then again Maura has a tendency to say that every couple of years and still she remains. On the other hand, NBC only has the show contracted through next season so there's a good chance that (unless they salvage it again, which would be beyond me) next season will be the end of it all, no matter what. So that begs the question: if Goran is only doing five episodes, but Maura is planning to fulfill the entire season, how in the name of Jack Orman does that idiot Wells think he can pull off a "love of a lifetime, happily ever after" story with those two?

Some people think Luka will leave the show to go home to Croatia, which I would have thought a plausible ending for his character a few years ago... but not now. I find it unbelievably ridiculous to think that Luka would ever leave his son, even if he and Abby were on bad terms. I don't care if they don't end up married or if they do but quickly decide it was a mistake - he would never just move an ocean away from his child. I don't necessarily like Luka, but I do know that he's a dedicated father and he has always been very much about the love he has for his children, past and present.

So, really, the only option I can see for Goran leaving without Maura is for Luka to be killed off. Now, Abby has always been my favorite character on the show and I would never wish her pain and suffering - so it's a little bit cruel for me to say Luka needs to die. I don't want him to die just so that he can't be with Abby anymore - that's not what I'm saying. I'm just saying it seems to be the only believable option for the situation the actors are in right now. The only other possible out would be for him to have to go off to Croatia or whateverthefuck for months on end for whatever stupid reason, and then have Abby and baby Joe go to live with him there in the end when Maura actually leaves. But you know what? That idea is pretty much ludicrous. I would think that to be a really idiotic cop-out and a just plain retarded storyline. You can't try to recreate what happened with Doug and Carol, so don't even go there with me.

All of that aside, the most infuriating point of interest to me is that John Wells is - by and large - an incredible effing idiot. I have no idea why NBC loves and trusts him so much, seeing as he is more or less solely responsible for the decline of two of their once top-rated shows (ER and The West Wing, respectively). They had two shows that were living on top of the world, and suddenly he takes over the reigns and they both go to Hell in a handbasket. They both became virtually unwatchable because of what he did to the foundations and the relationships of those shows. The man does not understand the concept of writing for television, because if he did he would understand the importance of couples and solid relationships. One could argue that he clearly does understand that, given his dedication to the Abby/Luka storyline, but I would be forced to start a debate.

And that's exactly what I'm doing.

John Wells is completely incompetent when it comes to keeping viewers involved. He is so incredibly self-righteous about his worldview and his opinions, to the point where he could care less if the audience disagrees with him. I don't know what his purpose was for never fulfilling the Josh/Donna dynamic on West Wing, but it was a huge mistake. They were basically canon, and he just ignored it. As for ER, I could write an effing novel on the disaster that was the Congo storyline. And I'm not even talking about how it ruined my 'ship with the introduction of Kem and the subsequent exit of Carter. I'm simply talking about how he shoved it down our throats, time and time again, to the point where I sadly no longer gave a shit about the plight of the Congo people and their war. I was well aware of what's happening over there long before he brought it to my favorite show at the time; it's a true, terrible story that's actually happening, and I get that he wanted to give it some attention so we Americans would open our eyes to the rest of the world - but SERIOUSLY. To this day, a mere mention of Africa or the Congo makes me roll my eyes in boredom. It's like when a really great song gets overplayed and you suddenly can't stand to hear it anymore, eventhough you used to love it more than life itself. Not that the Congo storyline ever had a chance of being as cool as a really great song, but you get my point.

If the man paid any kind of attention to his fans, he would know that the number of Luka/Abby fans has always paled in comparison to the number of Carter/Abby fans. I'm not one of the crazy Carbies who still believes in her heart of hearts that it will go my way (although with the possibility of Noah's return next year, I kind of am.), but I definitely am the type of Carby who will always defend what they were and why it was better. There were two seasons of build-up for that relationship, then ongoing angst and fuzz and mutual understanding that they were meant for one another. Carter had stated loud and clear that despite how infuriating she can be and despite how often he wonders if they're meant for one another, in the 24th hour he would always come back around to the fact that he loved her and that was all that mattered.

All of this happened under the penmanship and production strategy of Jack Orman, mind you, and I will probablly never get over him leaving the show. He had Carter/Abby set up so perfectly, and 99% of the viewership totally bought into it. Then in comes John Wells (who I believe is responsible for Orman's exit, personally) and he fucked with so much shit that it was as if seasons 7 - 9 never even happened. He worked his ass off to make it seem to any casual or new viewer that Carter and Abby were never anything more than colleagues to one another - neither character ever even acknowledged what they once were to each other, and that was pretty much downright infuriating. Wells is, in my opinion, a laughable excuse for a television writer and producer. He clearly doesn't care about what his audience is interested in, and so I find it even more laughable that he now claims to be dedicated to the love story of Abby and Luka.

He doesn't know how to be dedicated to a love story. No romance has flourished or survived at all since he took over as the Executive Producer, and the only reason he's now "dedicated" to Abby and Luka is because they are the only believable (generally speaking, that is) couple on that show. No one else has enough history to make anyone really care. Abby and Luka's history isn't exactly one filled with smiles and fuzzy moments, so I don't quite get that one either - as I have already previously argued.

Let me just say this loud and clear: if Luka leaves to run off to Croatia, then Carter comes back for this "maybe" arc that has been rumored, thus putting Abby in the position to have to choose between the two of them... and then she chooses Luka? After he moved an ocean away and abandoned her and the kid? I will be livid. Well, I'm already livid but it will absolutely solidify my belief that John Wells is a freaking idiot.

I think the world will be a safer place if I just end this rant here and now, because chances are I could actually write about this for years. I just... I really think I may hate John Wells more than I hate Ben Affleck.

If you ask Caroline, that's really saying a lot.

One response to “ER: A "Dedicated" John Wells? What's that?”

Anonymous said...


I couldn't agree more.

Wells has been driving me mad for seasons now and I'm still mourning the loss of the OrmanGod.