Chaos in General

Another Romantic Romance

2011-04-24T14:10:00.003-04:00

I recently read a post on The TV Addict by Tiffany Vogt entitled, "Is Romance Dead on Television?" which argued that there were only very few actual romances on contemporary television. Vogt defined a proper romance as, "a hint of a soft whisper, the briefest of caress, or a stolen look of desire," and noted Castle, Merlin and The Vampire Diaries as a few examples of shows with such romances. And while I can't speak for Castle (it's on my next to watch list), I just want to say... the Vampire Diaries, really?! In my opinion, the so-called romances in that show are as arbitrary and flaky, if not more so, than the ones found in 90210 or Gossip Girl. And those have some horrific romantic continuities. But I want to argue for another, major romance, which is very controversial (and thus, all the more fun)...

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JACK AND KATE, LOST

Yes. I'm going there!

I realise this blog hasn't been updated in a while, but I figure I'll continue to post on here whenever I write something I feel is relevant to the readers of Chaos - and anything Jate certainly is!

My blog, Out of the Box, is where I now post my television recaps, articles and news, so head on over there for everything else! And enjoy this post. :)

The kind of romance that was argued for in the aforementioned article was the Jane Austen type, the pure, eternal romance that wasn't about which random characters were going to hook up any given week, but about something "much more delicate and elusive." What I think happened in Lost, with the central love triangle which aggravated the viewers for years, was exactly the juxtaposition of these two types of love stories - which is why the majority of the audience did not necessarily pick up on it, or were fully supportive of the ultimate sway of the triangle.

I myself was one of the people who couldn't for the life of me decipher whether we were meant to root for Jack or Sawyer to get "the girl" (which was obviously Kate, despite the other female characters on the show) - but then, at that time I'd never read Jane Austen, and I am after all a big fan of television series, with their occasionally crappy romances and all. Maybe I just wasn't used to the type of romantic storytelling, and didn't see the careful construction of both pairings as archetypes. Certainly, in retrospect it is much clearer to see that the writers were intending to do something new with romance, something subtler and more artistic rather than in your face and sensational. But equally certain was the fact that the viewers, myself included, weren't ready for it, hence the negative backlash that the triangle and Kate's character received.

But let's take a look at how the relationships of Jack and Kate and Sawyer and Kate could be said to respectively represent the two different types of romance - the sensational and modern versus the subtle and classic.

Sawyer and Kate: the SENSATIONAL

I want to start with talking about Sawyer and Kate because I believe that this relationship was arguably the more apparent of the two, definitely the more active and perhaps even the more popular choice for indifferent/casual viewers. Why? Because Sawyer and Kate together was the obvious choice, the easy choice, and the in many ways expected direction for the characters to head in.

While the Kate and Jack relationship was highlighted at the very beginning of the show and thus often referred to as the "original" pairing, a possible Kate/Sawyer connection was hinted at already in the second half of the Pilot, and it was set in clear and purposeful juxtaposition to the sweet, quiet, instinctual connection Kate formed with Jack by being unexpected, dangerous and "wrong" in all the right ways. Sawyer and Kate's attraction blossomed and was fed by Kate and Sawyer's similar, dark pasts, the former's ironically the main factor in separating Kate and Jack and eclipsing the initial connection between them.

Kate and Sawyer were loved by scores of fans calling themselves "Skaters," who enjoyed their sizzling chemistry, their similar dark natures and the scandalous trouble they got into together. Kate and Sawyer were the first couple in the triangle to kiss, the first to sleep together, the first to - arguably - say "I love you," and it was all very, very physical, visual, and obvious. In other words, a typical television romance. Not to simplify a complex relationship, because as we know the best "typical" TV relationships are layered like an onion and more complicated than post-structuralism. There was plenty of reason for the Skaters to argue that their couple, as opposed to Jack and Kate, was the "right" one, the "best" one and the one which would ultimately, obviously be confirmed in canon at the end of the show.

Jack and Kate: the SUBTLE

On the flip side we had the slow and steady development of the Jack and Kate relationship, and if watching the two of them struggle with their emotions without a pre-existing wish to support the couple, it must have been harder to understand than the feelings of Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth Bennet the first time you watch the Pride and Prejudice BBC miniseries. In that case, I know that I sure didn't get all the subtleties of the pair's growing and conflicted emotions before I'd read the novel, and then watched the series again. And well, Lost isn't even based on a book, so all the emotions have to come across in the performance. So if you don't already see it on your own, there's no reason that you'd bother to spend hours trying to work out what Kate and Jack could possibly be thinking to make them behave in the weird ways they seem to be behaving in. Especially in a trash TV culture where it's much more viable to suppose it is merely a case of bad writing and that the writers, actors and directors had no idea what the characters were thinking and were just trying to stave off the eventual romantic "choice" Kate allegedly had to make.

But taking into account Tiffany Vogt's article about true romances being so rare on television, I think it is not a far cry to suggest that the relationship between Jack and Kate, the subtleness, the uncertainty, the ambiguity, after all was said and done painted a much richer, much different and truly consistent picture of a romance than the usual, simplified and amplified TV show relationship.

Jack and Kate moments were sparse throughout the series. They were ambiguous, they were often silent, and viewed on their own, the answer to whether they indicated any romantic feelings between the characters was highly subjective. Take an early scene in the first season, where Kate approaches Jack on the beach, tells him that she wants him to know what she did, only for him to refuse her, saying that "We should all be able to start over." They look at each other, and share a melancholy silence as they sit on the beach side by side. That's it. Or another moment, where Kate catches Jack looking at her while she is collecting seeds, and they share the infamous, but ultimately arbitrary, "guava seed" moment. Their first kiss was about desperation, confusion, and anger - but not necessarily romantic passion. When they get together for a brief period of time it is more symbolic to portray the characters in a certain way, rather than graphic and fulfilling for their long-suffering fans. Jack and Kate's scenes are tender, they are underplayed, there is more going on in the characters' heads than their actions portray - which is very in tune with Vogt's description of the "hint of a soft whisper, the briefest of caress, or a stolen look of desire" type of romance. These scenes stand in sharp contrast to heavily suggestive Sawyer/Kate scenes, which are all very sexually charged, and often times include intimate physical interaction - for example one of their first scenes together where Sawyer grabs Kate's arm and pulls her close, when they strip down and swim in the jungle spring, their subsequent game of I Never and of course their later passionate kisses and graphic sex scenes.

Scenes between Jack and Kate did not seem to exist to point out that "look, there's a possibility for romance between the two, and look, sexual tension." They existed to form a bond between the characters of a deeper nature than romantic attraction (deeper, as it turns out, than life itself), and to "plant the seeds", if you will, both for romance and conflict. Jack and Kate - or "Jate", as fans dubbed their relationship, was never simple and their feelings for each other were never straightforward - though feelings between them were always heavy, for better or worse. Their relationship was never about whether or not they were going to hook up, whatever battling shippers would proclaim. Their relationship was about their relationship - not just the romantic aspect. And this confused a lot of people, who did not tune in to the biggest mystery show on television to analyse feelings and relationships, and who were not used to these old-fashioned subtle romances because, as Vogt states, they are so few and far between.

Once the series finale rolled around, and Kate kissed Jack and declared that she loved him - and subsequently sought him out in Second Life and sat by him in the church of eternity - the long-awaited choice was clear. Some were elated cause they had thought it all along, while others were confused, angry and upset because they believed they had been misled to believe that Kate and Sawyer was the "true" pairing.

But ultimately, neither pairing was wrong, they were just different. Lost was confusing everybody because it was telling two love stories simultaneously: the classic romance, and the sensational, epic love story. Of course, the additional twist was that the show was telling these stories with the same female character - thus in a way symbolising the conflict in contemporary society between the old and the new, between the beautiful and the amplified. There is a general fear of losing the "high culture" in an over-saturated, media crazed society, and postmodernist television is (while brilliant in a lot of ways) dissolving the barrier the low and the high culture. Lost is taking this to a whole new level, by literally staging a battle for dominance between these two types of storytelling, these two different approaches to romance - using the characters Jack and Sawyer as champions for the two sides. Whether Jack and Kate ending up together signals a return to romance as it used to be, or whether it just shows it to be more eternal, lasting and memorable, is up for debate.

Good ship bad ship?

Perhaps one of the reasons why the Jaters and Skaters were infamous on the Internet for their childish fights, and detested by the Lost fanbase as a whole, was because their battle for that all important confirmation, or "endgame" status, became about more than just the dominance of their preferred male, but also for their respective preferred type of romance. And why the outcome was so hard to call, why each side would swear on all their families and friends that they were supporting the "right" side, was because neither side was decidedly wrong. Because who is to decide which art is more valid, the classic or the popular? Who can say what type of romance is more relevant in the 21st century, the traditional or the sensational?

As it was, Jack and Kate turned out to be the literal endgame, their souls for all intents and purposes uniting in death and moving into the light entwined, while Sawyer and Kate - important enough to each other to be in the church together but otherwise not shown to interact significantly - did not have as strong a romantic connection, each finding their ultimate companion in another.

What I think this means, in light of the TV Addict article about romance on television, is that in the case of Lost, traditional, "slow burning flame" type romance in the style of Darcy and Elizabeth and now Jack and Kate ultimately outlasts seasonal, "roaring fire" type love like Sawyer and Kate's. Still, one type of relationship is absolutely not more valid than another and I don't think the show was trying to make it appear so. Kate and Sawyer's love was real, and everything it was meant to be: passionate, intense, and short-lived. Jack and Kate's love was equally real. But subtler, slower, and eternal. And therefore, less popular in a 2-second attention span consumer society.

The shame is of course that this juxtaposition and message - intentional or not - was lost in a sea of pop culture and postmodernism, forgotten amongst the four-toed statues, hatches, smoke monsters and other in-your-face, larger than life objects of attention. The subtle characteristics and feelings of Kate not-a-coincidental-last-name Austen were overlooked in favour of far more interesting, big action characters like John Locke, Ben Linus and Jacob.

Still, I hope that the shipper war has died down enough and the mythology fans have tempered down enough that we can begin to debate the relationships of Lost, their validity and their relevance to society at large, because I always felt that it was a sadly overlooked aspect of the incredibly deep, layered TV show, something which, if you took it seriously, it was impossible for others to take you seriously for.

The Case for a Kurt and Finn Hook-up

2010-04-29T13:40:00.016-04:00

In this post I am going to talk about Glee, and why I think a Kurt/Finn romance would be the best “New Direction” to take the show in next season. I’m just full of crackpot ships these days! It’s only going to be a short little post so I hope everyone will take the time to read and consider my points. :)

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There are a number of stock storylines that pretty much all TV shows use at some point or another to “shock” the audience or blow life into a boring plot. Death, pregnancy, hookups, breakups and the gay revelation are some of the most common ones; they’re so common, in fact, that they’re more expected elements in a narrative than they are surprising.

Under the gay storyline category, there are two main subcategories: the character-turns-from-straight-to-gay-and-never-looks-back route ala Willow in Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and the more soapy gay-affair route where a straight character has a same-sex encounter (usually done to boost ratings) before returning to their original love interest, as demonstrated by Marissa in The OC and most recently Adrianna in 90210. The common theme here is that usually, the characters that turn gay are women. Male gay characters in TV shows are almost always gay when they are introduced, usually secure in their sexuality, and their love interests are always characters brought in solely for this purpose. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I have never seen a male, straight character in a TV show suddenly experience an unexpected attraction to another man, pursue this attraction, and then go back to dating girls. Bisexuality is for whatever reason much more accepted with girls on TV, just as it’s more accepted for girls to wear trousers than men to wear skirts in real life – there’s probably a reason why this is the case; maybe the writers don’t want to risk demasculinizing the male characters or alienate the male viewers who identify with them. Women who sleep with women are empowered; men who sleep with men are less masculine than men who sleep with women – it’s a cruel, outdated stereotype, but it still seems to affect TV narratives. It’s one of those irksome things like black characters dating other black characters by default, with very few shows managing unobtrusive race-blindedness as it should be.

(Note: Torchwood is of course the obvious exception to this rule; I also don't take it into account because I think in general, Britain is far less excited by representations of sexuality, it's just not a big deal over here whereas in America it seems like every single diversion from "conventional" sexuality in the media is considered a political statement.)

So here’s my proposal for the envelope-pushing, boundary-crossing Glee: let’s change the stereotypes, let’s break out of the TV norms, and allow the male lead to feel attraction to another guy – and show that this is okay. And after this, let’s have Finn return to Rachel (I do ship them), and still be as much of a man as he’s ever been. Let him be curious about Kurt, and let him act on this curiosity, and then decide to be with Rachel not because she’s a girl but because he likes her more. Let it be like him choosing between Rachel and Quinn, but a bit more political. If any show can do it, it’s Glee!

So why not? It would be the perfect plot line to reinvent the show for season 2, a perfect way to extend the Rachel/Finn will-they-won't-they suspense and to spice up the romance. It would be surprising and unexpected, and it would just be way more interesting than Finn hooking up with a random girl or Kurt with a random guy (as I'm sure he will sooner or later). I don't see any reason that Glee could not do this ship, and I might judge them a little for not pursuing it just because they've got a chance to really take a step forward and take a stand in the gay rights campaign, and because it's Glee, it would be cool. It would also give Finn some much-needed depth, and probably audience sympathy.

Plus, although the show would never ever get the rights to it, couldn't you just see the duet now: "Something There" from Beauty and the Beast. It would be EPIC.

What would you say to a Finn/Kurt hook-up? Yay or nay?

EDIT: Holy crap, I wrote the above before seeing the last episode - how much are they hammering home the Finn/Kurt ship?! The duet? Damn, they're so close to heading in the right direction! :) Major angst... awesome.

Shady Lady: The Perils of Shipping in FlashForward

2010-04-18T09:11:00.006-04:00

FlashForward is pretty good. It’s not the post-Lost beacon of light that ABC was hoping would lead them forward, but it’s definitely getting better. It’s like the Artemis Fowl to Harry Potter – pretty good, but always marred by its inferiority.

But a word of caution to all who dare to ship in these unsteady waters.

WARNING: Spoilers for the latest episode.

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To be fair, I think we shippers are quick to raise our expectations to TV shows, quick to forget the burns we’ve suffered in the past in the hope that this time, we’ll find that ultimate, perfect OTP who actually get their happy ending. When has that ever happened in a sci-fi drama? X-Files, sure, but how anticlimactic was that? Buffy, don’t even go there. In all honesty shipping is something the fans are pressing on the producers, who see romance as merely another plot device. But still we ship, in vain hope, and it mostly just brings us pain. No reason to think it’s gonna be different this time, yet I can’t help it. I have obsessive-compulsive shipping disorder.

In FlashForward, I have three ships. They are all more or less doomed. They are also random, and unconventional, but in the name of full disclosure journalism I’m going to tell you what they are and let you judge me for it:

1. Bryce and Nicole

Probably the least unconventional and most likely, these two seem headed in the right direction after their unexpected kiss in ‘Queen Sacrifice, and I like the story that’s being told through these two: does Bryce follow the potential happiness that his flash showed him, or does he take the unbeaten path, choose the unknown future in order to be with the amazing girl he’s found and who seems perfect for him? And will Nicole be able to accept his love, knowing that he’s always going to be keeping one eye open for Keiko? I believe in the love that’s in front of you, and I think the audience in general is more invested in Bryce/Nicole because we’ve actually been given their buildup, so here’s hoping they actually stand a chance. But I’m thinking not, because that would be too easy: Nicole is still facing her drowning, and Bryce IS, I believe, going to meet Keiko in that restaurant. The twist I’m hoping for is of course that Nicole and Bryce went to the restaurant together and Bryce will come to Nicole’s rescue at the last minute… but it just seems too easy, and Keiko seems like she’s going to be more important as the episodes go on.

2. Lloyd and Olivia

Haha, seriously, I know I should ship Mark/Olivia, I just can’t. They have no chemistry, and Mark annoys me to no end… so hellooo Lloyd. Unlike most people I actually think that Lloyd is attractive, and Olivia and him are far more interesting! Mark and Olivia are in a marriage that’s falling apart, and Lloyd and Olivia are in the stages of bonding and crossing The Line, and that’s just a way more interesting story to me. But the fact that they got together this past episode kind of suggests to me that they’re not going to be endgame; Mark is the hero after all and I think they’ll work it out, if for nothing else then because of Charlie (random sidenote, Sonya Walger also has a child called Charlie in Lost. Coincidence?! Well, probably). I think Lloyd comparing himself to Lancelot last episode was hilarious, but very fitting: Mark is the one Olivia should be with, but Lloyd is the forbidden, the temptation, and the one she wants. Is it founded on anything but the knowledge that they will be together in the future? Maybe not, but then remember a few episodes ago when they talked about almost having met in college. There’s something fated about the two of them, and I can’t help ship them, as wrong as that is. I’m in the minority here, but I don’t care.

3. Demetri and Janis

TOLD YOU you would judge me! This ship isn’t even a ship. These two people are not even a possibility because a) Janis is gay, b) Demetri is getting married, c) Janis is evil apparently and d) Demetri is so gonna die. But I shipped them since the Pilot! Demetri is my favourite character, Zoe annoys me, and I liked the idea of Janis finding out she was going to be pregnant, and the big question was who the father would be. And I’m glad they didn’t abandon that question because it’s far more interesting to have it be someone we know rather than a sperm bank. Because they actually got together to make Willa, and that was just so shocking and unexpected and warming to my fragile shipper heart! Somehow, I knew that Demetri would end up being the father, and this is what drew me to the pairing... But of course, now we found out that Janis is the mole - which, can I just say, is so inconsistent for her character and a bad move on the writers’ part because we want people on the show we can trust and who we like, and Janis was becoming such a person. She’s pregnant, with Demetri’s child, and I have to believe that this will make her come back to the good side… but I don’t know. They’re having a child together and I’m excited about it, but the fact that Janis would betray her friends like that? Kind of puts a damper on the whole thing.

So. Am I doomed to disappointment with this show or what? I guess the funny thing is that what all these three couples have in common is that I actually didn’t in a million years think that they stood even the tiniest chance of validation. I’ve actually got more than I hoped for so far… I guess I should be thankful! But the truth is that FlashForward just isn't a show you watch for the romance. You watch for the surprises, like the reveal that Janis was the mole, and you're better off forgetting about OTPs and ultimate romantic happiness. One day maybe I'll learn my lesson.

Lost: What Kate Does - LTDA

2010-02-10T13:51:00.009-05:00

Kate and Sawyer had a moment... and I enjoyed it.
Among other things.

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Off Island
Kate's Running
What always strikes me about Kate's 'fugitive' episodes is that they let you know she's this runaway fugitive, but she always risks her 'freedom' to save someone else. There's an ever-present dilemma between what she has to do to get away and what she knows is right and doing what's right seems to always win out in the end. She didn't have to go back for Claire, she certainly didn't have to go to the house with her, and without a doubt she should NOT have gone in with her at the hospital.

Kate could very well have dropped her off at the ER steps and driven away – a taxi driver fulfilling their fare. She even glances at police cars parked nearby and chooses to stay with Claire because she doesn't want this woman to have to be alone. A theme echoed on the island – no one should have to be alone, and maybe that's why she continually goes after Sawyer. If she didn't, who else would? Same reason she went after Locke at the hatch in season two. Same reason she always goes into the 'heart of darkness' after anyone. Jack's philosophy of 'live together; die alone' has been exemplified in no other character more often – and no other character, ironically, is hated more, than Kate.

Kate and Jack and Connections
There's always been this quote floating around Jater forums about Jack and Kate and it's always been attributed to JJ Abrams. I don't know whether he said it or not, but it's eerie that seasons later, the content is strikingly on target. It refers to them as being connected: that they have met before, that they were supposed to meet now, and that they would meet again in another life. It's romantically beautiful, this idea that some people are just destined to be together. So, while some would pass off Kate's watching Jack as she drove past him as mere recognition that this guy was the guy she snatched the pen from on the plane, and oppositely, his pause was the same, shipper or not, I think it's more than that.

The world slowed down (and by that, I mean the pacing of the scene) and some sort of recognition did take place, but it was more than just, "I saw this person on the plane." The elevator ride with "James" yielded exactly the opposite results – Kate's nonchalant staring at the ceiling, a few eye rolls, and a wry grin as she left. She encouraged the cab driver to simply run over Artz's stuff. The same way Jack recognized something in himself on the plane, I think they recognized something in each other and I'm curious to see where Kate's 'running' takes her in the next few side-flashes.

Kate, Claire, and Aaron
In the same vein of thought, Kate's rummaging through Claire's luggage didn't seem to click with her until she pulled out that stuffed whale – the same one a toddler Aaron held while she argued with Jack just before he left them in the normal timeline. Though I believe she would have taken the stuff back to Claire anyways, and she would have gone back and been there for Claire, there's something in her connected to Aaron as well. The mention of his name gave her pause, and the strong suggestion that Claire keep her boy were not just the words of a stranger.

Interestingly, because of what has occurred in the actual timeline, Kate is back on the island to get Claire and reunited her with Aaron. If Claire, in the alternate timeline, DOES keep Aaron and raise him as her own, will this somehow impact the actual timeline? Does it fulfill both of the psychic's visions, or is this WHY the psychic had two "visions" – one of Claire raising her own child and another of "a couple in Los Angeles" raising Aaron. More on that later.

On Island
Sawyer, Kate, and Juliet
Sawyer's happiest time, when he felt most complete and most compelled to be a better person, were his three years spent with Juliet. That he walked in a rage from the temple back to their abode in Othersville only to tear up floorboards and remove a single engagement ring should say a lot about where his heart truly lies. And the following scene with Kate is probably the most adult either of them have ever been with one another because those three years they spent apart allowed them both to experience and lose their true love.

Their talk on the dock, where Kate accepts the blame for Juliet's death and James looks past his anger at Jack and takes on part of the blame himself, shows a level of growth on both of their parts that they would never have achieved together. No more shacking up in tents or trading mix tapes in the sand like juvenile delinquents. Of course, the more they've grown, the more they've realized that they've grown apart. Where Sawyer throws his ring into the ocean and declares himself an island nomad; Kate breaks down – partially because of the conversation with Sawyer about Juliet, about how it didn't work out how they wanted it to, and about being alone maybe being a destiny in itself; partially because the man who gave Kate a diamond ring and asked her to marry him, their relationship didn't work out how THEY wanted it to and he's back in a temple fulfilling a destiny she's not sure she's a part of anymore – and is left to sort out her problems with a clearer understanding of what she stands to lose.

The Test, The Infection, The "Cure"
Last week I figured they were testing Sayid to see if he was inhabited by Smokey. Now we know, definitively, what being "Infected" means – to be 'marked' by the Man in Black. But what does it mean? Can he control you? Or are you just evil; the way small children are born innocent and then 'touched' by the sins of adulthood… and can one repent. The idea of repenting isn't new to Lost so it stands to reason that one who has been infected CAN be cleansed. Speaking religiously, will Echo's 'church' have something to do with it? And if it does, should we finally declare this a war between God and the devil himself? Or smaller minions playing a 'travel size' version of the same game.

What exactly denotes one who is 'marked'? And how do they become infected? What about HOW he was shot lead to it? What part did Jack play? Are we looking at his character all wrong? Some postulate that Jack is somehow related to the island, and the idea is that he's always been related to Jacob, but what if his lineage goes back somewhere sinister?

But if it did, would Dogen have leapt up to keep him from swallowing the poison pill? Or might the pill have had some other effect on Jack? I guess it depends on how much we trust Dogen.

Connecting the Side-Flashes
Recently I read a quote from Darlton saying the Side Flashes are more important than the Island stories. It might have been a joke, but, curiously, what if it's somehow true. What happens in the side flashes IS more important because, at some point, the two lines have to converge?

My theory on the imaginary timeline is that it is 'course correction'. Obviously you can't change something in the past. If they'd detonated the bomb and their plane had never crashed, they'd never have been on the path to be on the island to detonate a bomb, so another course – another timeline – was created to rectify the damage. Someone mentioned last night that everyone's characters, in both timelines, felt like they were MISSING something. I concur. They were missing a part of themselves. The eventual merging of their normal self and their alternate universe self might just be the cleansing ritual needed for those infected to become uninfected, and for those searching for their destinies to finally fulfill them.

Only time will tell.

Chuck: What the Chuck?

2010-02-09T14:17:00.005-05:00

When I ate my Subways Sweet Onion Chicken Teriyaki sandwich, demanding a third season of Chuck, never in a million years would I have thought that I was buying into the one thing I absolutely loathe about television series as a whole.

This insane notion that, as a viewer, what I find most interesting is the amount of time they can keep two destined characters apart insults me seasonally, but that alone is not enough to incur my wrath because it's actually fairly typical and usually acceptable when there's an end in sight – something writers of ALL series should find BEFORE they start their tinkering – because I'm really watching for the, you know, plot.

That doesn't mean screwing with the relationships doesn't piss me off.

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A little separation, a few obstacles, the idea that you have to wait just a little bit longer to see that these characters are being written OBVIOUSLY on their way towards coupledom is one thing… UST is a magical thing. UST, or Unresolved Sexual Tension for those not acronymically inclined, is a driving force with romantically linked characters.

For most shows, there is a pair of leads – traditionally male and female – and part of the fun of watching the show is that beyond whatever happens contained to any specific episode, there is a relationship that develops within the overall arch of the series, generally hinting at – and eventually coming to – romance. Chuck, aside from the spy games, has at its core this constant almost-there relationship between Chuck and his spy-handler Sarah.

Sarah is the ex-partner/girlfriend of Chuck's old best friend Bryce and for a good part of season one, while Chuck had a growing infatuation with Sarah, her constant reminder to him was that falling in love with a spy was dangerous and she insisted the feelings were NOT mutual. Though the audience could tell otherwise, it was believable that she would resist this relationship, given that Bryce was presumed dead, so why WOULD Sarah want to begin a new relationship with Chuck.

Season two seemed to have these two characters coming to grips with the fact that yes, their feelings were reciprocated, and that maybe, just maybe it could work, but each week reminded them that it couldn't. Not as long as they were spies. And then they brought in Chuck's ex-girlfriend who turned out to be a bad guy, no one seemed to care, it was awkward, and they wrapped that storyline up quicker than you could say, "Chuck this." Oh, and there was that spy who got his ass kicked and Sarah was, like, "Psht."

Fans fought for a third season. They fought for the right to see the storyline – which ended with Chuck uploading a newer version of the intersect that gave him instant access to knowledge like… oh… Kung Fu – progress and also, to see these characters progress, since they'd never been given a proper coupling. As an aside, I say, if you're not watching a television show with at least a little hint of 'shipper' in you, you will never be satisfied with the ending of a show; if you outright reject a ship, you will never be satisfied with a show period. Ships are part of the shows we watch and as humans we should root for them.

So we get this third season, opening with Chuck having been whisked away to a secret location to learn to use his new intersect to become a Real Spy, as opposed to the lucky idiot he's been portrayed to be during spy missions thus far. This idea has real potential because it's now what Chuck wants, because of Sarah. BUT, now Sarah wants nothing to do with the spy business – she wants to leave it for good, and she wants Chuck to join her. Creatively, this is amazing and believable and heart wrenching at the same time, but in the way that's lovely to watch.

Of course, it’s not enough. We've now been introduced to two new characters, Hannah and CIA Special Agent Daniel Shaw who serve as potential love interests for Chuck and Sarah, respectively. And I've got one question: Why?

With Chuck advancing in his skills, it makes sense for them to send in a new agent to further his training, and possibly serve as an annoyance to the existing team – proving how well they work together – but to also make him a love interest for Sarah… Sarah, who just decided she wanted to leave the spy game altogether to pursue a normal life with Chuck. Sarah, who spent two seasons fighting her feelings for Chuck because of Bryce's death. I'm supposed to believe she's just going to fall into a relationship with this guy she's known a month because she's… jealous? Poisoned? Really really dumb?

Hannah's introduction, aside from my Kristin Kreuk bias (by the time the Smallville scribes pulled their heads out of Lana's punani they'd destroyed the show… I hear they've rebounded beautifully in her absence), makes even less sense. Does she serve as a reminder to Chuck that he DOESN'T want to be a spy, only a few episodes after he's decided to run the gauntlet? Will she prove to be another spy? She's overqualified for the Buy More, under qualified for Chuck, and nothing more than a nuisance to the storyline already established.

The obstacle that made sense, the one they'd introduced believably at the beginning of the season, was Chuck eschewing a relationship with Sarah to become a real spy, and it's an idea that I looked forward to seeing Chuck and Sarah struggle with. Instead we get televisions newest Love Quadrangle and unfortunately 'Chuck versus the Mask' left me with a very sour taste in my mouth… one that not even a million Subway Sweet Onion Chicken Teriyaki sandwiches can cure.

Fringe: Balancing the Equation

2010-02-05T14:24:00.006-05:00

It was something my fellow classmates had a hard time grasping in chemistry, the idea that each side of the equation must be equal or something would go terribly wrong. For Fringe, this balance exists between two universes, and when Newton – the newly re-headed bad guy – attempts to open a doorway to the other universe, the results are disastrous.

The doorway, it seems, allowed a building – and all of its occupants – to travel into our dimension, fusing with the building – and all of its occupants – already in existence in a mishmash of parts and personalities. Through the memory of an old experiment, Walter realizes that he already knows what is going to occur: Something from our universe must travel into the other to re-establish the balance that was thrown off by Newton's experiment.
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Peter's eventual conclusion is that some building of equal mass must travel to the other side and the episode's main charge is finding that building and evacuating all of its occupants. The question of how falls on Walter, who presumes it can be located by someone who can see the opening window to the other side – something he is sure Olivia can do, if she can only re-activate another one of her abilities: seeing the things in our world that do not belong… the things that come from the other reality. This catapults our heroine on a journey back to the place where this ability began – the titular 'Jacksonville'.

Previously mentioned as a smaller cell of a larger study, Walter informs us that it was the only place where the Cortexiphan injected into small children worked, giving them special abilities. The strongest of those children, Olivia – then known as Olive– Dunham, arrives and observes that despite her "freakish" memory, she has absolutely no recollection of the Day Care Center in which the experiments took place.

As an aside, did the parents consent to this secret testing? Olivia had mentioned her father had been in the army, stationed for a short while in Jacksonville – if he did consent, were these trials part of some larger government testing? Creating a soldier who can destroy an enemy with their mind would be valuable to a government looking to eradicate losses, both personal and political.

The key to reconciling Olivia with her previous perceptive powers, says Walter, lies in their ties to strong emotions. With the help of another dose of Cortexiphan and Walter's special blend of drugs, Walter sends Olivia into a dream-like place where she soon finds she's not alone. A small child argues with Olivia that she doesn't want to do this anymore and that she has to make them stop. Olivia catches the child, comforting her before asking her name. "Olive."

Confronted with herself, she's lost in that fear and the child disappears from her arms, only to appear a foot away with eerily bright blue eyes, scaring Olivia enough to wake her from her dream no more able to see the things out-of-place than she was before. The emotion Walter was shooting for, he explains upon re-watching the video we previous saw of Olive sitting in the pristine center of a scorched room, was fear. Of course, Olivia isn't afraid of anything anymore and Walter presumes that without the particularly strong emotion of fear she will never see what she needs to see.

Returning to Manhattan more jarred than enlightened, the team sets out to solve the riddle of which building will be transported using the only piece of information they do have – it must be of equal mass to the building that came from the other side. Of course, the closer it draws to the moment of truth (as Walter calculates they had roughly 40 hours from the time the original building came through), the more helpless Olivia feels.

As the only known person to have had this ability, she feels responsible and approaches Peter with this fear. In comforting her, the duo lean in for their first shared kiss and Olivia realizes, she's afraid. She bolts from the room, looks out over the city, and sees a building shimmering in the distance. The occupants of the building are evacuated and the building gets sucked violently from sight, something Olivia knows the conspiracy theorists will have a field day with.

Of course, the fans can have a field day with this episode. Did Olivia's FEAR of not finding the building trigger her ability (an emotion *I* would have classified closer to disappointment, or frustration), or did her fear of what was about to occur right in front of her – being approached by Peter in a more-than-friendly capacity – flop her gut in a less than fearful and more like love kind of way. Walter only stated that it had to be a strong emotion; he assumed it was fear because of what worked with the children – particularly, Olive. For a child, a strong emotion can be anything; as an adult, it's harder to stimulate love than fear, and it is definitely the greater of the two emotions.

There's also now the question of Peter. Before departing on their first 'date', Olivia is able to see Peter shimmer in much the same way she was able to see the building in the city, clueing her into the fact that he is not part of this reality. Of course, given the information we received throughout this episode, for Peter to have come into our world, something (or someone) of equal mass must have gone into the other.

Did Walter deposit Peter's dead body into alt-Peter's bed, for his parents to find and mourn? Or, given his curiously saddened response to Astrid's proclamation that the alt-people just vanished and their loved ones would never know where they went, did he simply steal Peter, leaving alt-Peter's parents to wonder forever what happened to their son. Is that the reason for this "war" of the worlds? Alt-Walter might not have changed as much as our Walter has and his vengeance may be a great behemoth of scientific catastrophe waiting to happen.

It also begs the question, William Bell is too large to have 'replaced' Peter in the alt-world so whom did he replace? Or, as Walter mentioned, Peter was more rotund as a child, possibly Bell would have been a lanky fellow and WAS his replacement. And where does Nina fit into all of this? Did she help orchestrate Peter's substitution and 'rehabilitation'? Is travelling to the other universe how she lost her right arm?

And, given the dangers of temporal displacement, though Olivia seems pleased that they saved the occupants of the hotel in OUR universe, she gave little thought to the consequence of said building merging with its mirror in the OTHER universe. Presumably this mystery is being solved by Alt-Olivia, with or without the aid of Alt-Walter. From a previous episode we know she's still working in a 'Fringe' division with Broyles and Agent Francis.

Which brings us back to Peter, the one element that – no matter the sequence of events – increasingly seems to be at the heart of the imbalance bringing these two universes crashing into one another. Does total balance between the universes require that he be returned? Does it require that of William Bell as well? Or is there something else, some other piece of the puzzle yet to be revealed. Can Olivia's abilities seal the gateways permanently, or would it require some greater event?

I envision a finale that involves alt-Peter asking alt-Walter to let him go, to stop trying to get him back because he's made a home where he is. I also envision Olivia encircling herself and Peter in a fiery wall of protection, mirroring what happened to her as a child, but this time using her powers out of not fear, but love. But something tells me we're in for something far greater.

We just have to wait two months to get to it.

Fringe: Advanced Eugenics

2010-01-29T13:36:00.004-05:00

Last night we learned that a Robert Bischoff worked within the Nazi regime as a double agent who helped them with experiments and advancements in genetics while slipping information to the allies. During his time there he worked with a man named Alfred Hoffman on the idea of a heat activated poison gas that could target specific genetic traits – an attempted to succeed at Hitler's dream of a pure blooded Aryan race – but his work was hidden away in old German books, presumably kept safe when Robert immigrated to the United States and the Nazi rule was brought to an end.

So when only the Jewish members of a wedding party perish from asphyxiation with no apparent cause, Peter discovers a cinnamon scented candle that, when examined, leads Walter to a chemical formula marked with his father's Seahorse signature.

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Of course the story is simple: a man seeks to complete the life (and by life, I mean LONG life) work he'd dedicated himself to – destroying anyone who did not fall into the Nazi ideal of having blue eyes and blonde hair – thus fulfilling the dreams of his leader. It would be curious to know how exactly Alfred stopped his aging, or rather, the appearance of aging as Walter was able to determine that he was at least one hundred years old from his DNA, but I doubt they'll return to that particular subject.

Alfred tested his poison on a Jewish family first, a sort of payback to the people he first sought to destroy, before taking the project to a larger scale that would involve killing possibly hundreds at a conference that promoted unity in the world. Of course, having seen Walter and identifying him as the son of Robert, Alfred created a side project – a poison that would specifically target Walter, and in this personal vengeance he laid the path for his own execution. After unsuccessfully murdering Walter, using his own lab, and his own notes, Walter was able to create a poison that would specifically target Alfred and killed him during the conference while Peter located the source of the toxins before they were ignited.

It's the implications of the story that are more complex. Peter's grandfather once worked with Nazi soldiers, and while his intentions in the end were to help the allies defeat them, he still created the formula to be able to do the things they wanted and willingly went through any number of other experiments in the name of science. His work, their goal, to create a better race of people through selectively studying and even killing others is not that far off from Walter's.

The Cortexiphan trials in Boston, Massachusetts (and its smaller cell study in Jacksonville, Florida) in the early 80's were essentially continuations of the experiments started in Robert's era. Walter selected groups of children because of specific genetic traits, secluding them in 'camps', and issued them an experimental drug in order to progress latent abilities – to create a more advanced race of people able to fend off enemies, the results of which we've seen bits and pieces of, generally consisting of adults with varied psychic powers, but most prominently with Olivia Dunham – the full extent of her abilities yet unknown.

So it's curious that the first conversational piece for our main characters in 'The Bishop Revival' was Walter speaking of Peter's marriage… specifically, to Olivia. As someone from the other dimension that Walter has eluded to, that Olivia has travelled to, and that William Bell is now a member of, Peter has seemed to possess some type of special abilities himself.

With an IQ of 190, being from the other dimension, and Walter's experimentation on him as a child, it wouldn't take a leap to wonder whether Peter, paired up with Olivia, would make some kind of super-Romeo-and-Juliet-couple. Many have made mention of the fact that Olivia was able to start turning off the lights in 'Ability' only after Peter returned and stood behind her, and many had also noticed in 'Bad Dreams', his knack for instantly calming her with just a touch.

It's also questionable whether, in 'August', Peter was able to use the special gun that the Observer was using because he was from the other side, or possessed some psychic ability similar to the Observers, and to Olivia. Or whether his aptitude for empathizing with others, allowing himself to become a sort of bridge between the human emotions a subject is feeling and the tactical questions Olivia and the FBI have to ask, is akin to the empathetic abilities of the small boy in 'Inner Child'.

Speaking to the future of the show, or the future of this idea (and possibly pandering, in a creative and logical way, to the shipper faction of the audience), it also wouldn't take a leap to wonder whether Walter, subconsciously, would want Peter and Olivia to pair up in order to breed a more perfect child. Not a child that had a specific hair color, or eye color, or skin color, but a certain set of abilities that would make them, essentially, evolved – the best that both universes have to offer.

We got a glimpse into the Walter of old a few weeks ago in 'Grey Matters', a methodical scientist with a lack of compassion and a mind fully invested in his experimentation. Knowing that his father was probably the same type of person, and that Walter's relationship with his father might have been similar to the one Walter had with his own young son, Peter, is curious. Walter's current explanation for the genetic secrets held within the German books is "protection" from the information landing in evil hands – but Peter admitted that as a child, Walter LOVED those books, probably more so than his him (the inherent jealousy of that fact the very emotion that lead Peter to sell the books later).

Was Walter protecting the books, or learning from them for his own experiments with the Cortexiphan trials, his own attempt at fulfilling his own dreams, deeming them superior than his father's faux leader's, to create a super human race. Delving deeper into his past, into those past motivations that have driven all of the events in the still-occurring Pattern of activity could yield some interesting answers into not only Walter, but Peter and Olivia, as separate entities and as partners, however you choose to perceive that notion.

When Romance Goes Right

2010-01-10T12:36:00.006-05:00

Long time no see! I'm back from my self-imposed srs bsns time hiatus, yayy... ok, it's still srs bsns time. Shipping is not for suckers, people. I want to take a moment away from lamenting about ships gone wrong (which happens way too often) and worrying about ships that might go wrong (we all know which one that is) to talk a bit about three television romances that went well in 2009. While none of the shows are over yet and the table might yet turn, for now my ships actually worked out as I wished they would; the triangles tilted the right way, and the joy I felt at each realization was overwhelming... it's amazing how these shows touch us!

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1. Cappie and Casey, Greek.

This isn't a particularly mainstream show, and it might not mean much to a lot of you, but trust me when I say that the love triangle in this show is highly engaging, and ambiguous enough to have shippers on both sides (although I daresay the Cappie/Casey shippers largely outnumber the Evan/Casey shippers) clamouring for their ship to come out on top, because it's "clearly" the right choice. In my case I saw on one hand Casey's true, first love, the good guy who always did the right thing despite being labeled a failure and a flake, who through the series displayed unwavering affection for Casey, and only hesitated to be with her because of fears of letting her down again, and on another hand who Casey thought more societally acceptable; the rich, proper guy who she could make herself love because she needed security, despite the fact that he cheated on her in the first episode of the show. The choice was clear, and if she ended up with Evan, if such a type was validated by mainstream media, I might have to move to Mars. But in the mid-season finale last year, Cappie and Casey finally, finally overcame the obstacles and admitted how they felt. Casey had actually realized it at the end of last season, but the writers decided to prolong the suspense a little further… causing the big moment to be slightly anticlimactic in retrospect, but no less beautiful and emotional. I cried, in my living room, sitting under a blanket and feeling generally sorry for myself anyway, and it was great.

2. Lucas and Peyton, One Tree Hill.

Unless they pull a 90210 and mess with Happily Ever After-sealed classic pairings in crappy spin-offs, Lucas and Peyton sealed their bond with their departure from the show at the end of season 6 last year: married, with baby girl Sawyer Brooke (Albus Severus, you have a competitor for the most-awkward-double-name-ever title), Lucas and Peyton defied all odds. I know a lot of diehard Lucas/Brooke shippers and I'm not going to say that wasn't sometimes the clearer choice... when Lucas threw the basketball through the hoop with closed eyes, when he was so fixated on being with Brooke... it was a bit random how they suddenly turned it around to Lucas/Peyton (no doubt real life played a part in this), but I was happy none the less because Leyton was the first and original pairing; whatever Brooke later became she was first and foremost an obstacle to be overcome in order for Lucas and Peyton to be together... and like with most shows I always think that the producers want us to believe in the couple first introduced as the "right", point of view, sympathetic option, and when the romance suddenly goes in a different direction I always feel a little betrayed, so Leyton as endgame was extremely gratifying for me, and come on, after everything poor Peyton went through it was only fair that she got her prince – as indecisive and fluffy as that prince was at times, cough-Lindsay-cough. Brooke is way too awesome for Luke anyway.

3. Will and Emma, Glee.

Ahhhh Glee. I want to write lots of lots about the epicness of this show, but it seems to be a common theme so I'll stick to this little gem of a pairing. There was little doubt that their epic romance would eventually take off, yet the worrier in me still feared that Will's integrity and denial or Terri's persistence would get in the way (and it still might, according to Jessalyn Gilsig in a recent interview). It was so obvious that Terri was selfish, manipulative and decidedly not good enough for our singing sensation, yet Will seemed so fully devoted to her that I worried that perhaps she would get pregnant after all. But she didn't, and he's leaving her, and Will/Emma finally got their show-stopping musical finale. It's not the end though, and who knows what will happen – the producers seem way too keen on trying to live up to what they think the fans want that they might turn around tomorrow and change their minds – but for now, can I just say PAYOFF! How about a round of applause? Standing ovation? Take A Bow writers, you deserve it!

So that's it guys, let's hope more romances go our way in 2010.......!

(*credit for the picture is: http://www.moragalleries.com.au/dsylvester/bizarre_love_triangle.jpg)

The Office: Fandom Merit and Malarkey

2009-11-25T20:33:00.005-05:00

There's an odd trend in fandom that I've had the displeasure of observing that has to be explained before talking about the current season of The Office.

1. During the first season of a show, it can do no wrong and fandom overflows with love and creativity.

2. During the second season a show makes tweaks. Fans begin to question what they saw in the show in the first season. Their creativity is no longer a celebration of what they're watching, but an expression of what they wish they were watching.

3. At some point shortly afterward, fandom sours. Because we all know the guys running the show should totally be following what every single member of fandom wants, even if it makes no sense.
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Recently, on an internet community that shall remain nameless, there have been multiple posts that caught my attention regarding the direction that the writing staff of The Office has taken with several characters.. People are pissed because… Ryan's wearing stupid clothes and… Jim isn't pulling pranks?

I chalk a lot of it up to anti-shippers (not to be mistaken for 'non-shippers'). A recent roasting of Pam decried her decision to drop out of art school because IT'S HER DREAM!!!!!!!!! (Exclamation points are fandom's, not my own.) Since Pam's 'idiotic' choice, she's accused of devolving into an uncaring pregnant jerk who's more of an annoyance than a source of entertainment. I would say the same of those who have decided Pam made an 'idiotic' choice.

Pam's 'dream' was to become an artist and she followed that by taking a few courses and having her work in an art show where it received little to no attention. After doing some web design for Dunder Mifflin, she decided to go to art school in New York. She failed classes, wasn't enjoying herself… and she missed Jim. Her decision to return to Scranton wasn't failure; it was recognition. While Pam loves art, it wasn't her biggest dream anymore. Her dream became a future with Jim.

Pam is no less of an artist because she dropped out of art school and she is not a failure because The Office chooses not to show what's going on in the garage Jim converted into an art studio. It would be wonderful if Pam's art were to re-emerge, transformed, at some point later in the series because it would no longer be driven by a need to fulfill a dream, but will be the extension of a dream fulfilled.

As for her attitude, I took issue with her asking people not to wear perfume, but understand that it's a mockery of the selfishness of motherhood sometimes today. It also set up the vomit gag. Small sacrifices, folks. But what I think people are angry at – or at least what I saw a backlash about – was her slapping Michael. Some people think too highly of themselves and underestimate how they'd react if their own mother were dating their own boss and then watched said boss dump their mother on her birthday.

Plus, this show is ridiculous. If you don't acknowledge that, you're too lost to debate with.

Jim's decision to grow within the company has been deemed inconsistent with his character and now that he's hooked up with Pam, he's boring. Somewhere we've bought into this idea that a television show is boring if the main couple is together. You know what happens when a couple in the real world gets together? They enter into a new phase in their relationship called 'Dating'. Then there's the 'Marriage' phase. I know we're not used to believing that phase can work, but trust me, it still can. And when the 'Marriage' phase starts, sometimes it turns into the 'Two Kids and a Minivan' phase.

When a show goes south after their couple hooks up, it's the fault of bad writers who've decided coupling means death instead of seeing it as just a new phase in a relationship.

Jim, like many people in the real world, never really had a goal. The point when he decided he wanted to transfer to another branch to get away from Pam (when he thought he just couldn't have her) he started to toy with the idea that maybe he could grow within Dunder Mifflin and become a great salesman. Retiring as a salesman isn't everyone's goal, but people do it every day and they've had great (and often profitable) lives. Once Jim started a real relationship with Pam, his goal became making a life with Pam. With that comes the responsibility that often requires us to put aside things like playing daily pranks in order to work just a little harder to bring in the dough. He will never lose the jester inside, but he's learned to be more reserved about it.

It's called Growing Up, something many in fandom would benefit from.

Outside of this relationship come the 'favorite character' gripes. A lot of fans fail to recognize that their favorite characters are not necessarily the main characters and that it is main characters around which the core story revolves. I, personally, do not like Michael Scott. I suffer through most of his scenes outside of the office, but he is a main character and I have few justifiable complaints about his scenes – like in this past week's where I expected the great salesman that Michael Scott actually IS to actually HAVE a 45 day plan - but I understand when my complaints are JUST because I don't particularly like the character.

I've also never had any real strong feelings towards Ryan. He was the Temp, then he was Fire Guy, then he was that guy with no sales who got a high position at corporate, then he was the corporate guy who cheated and went to jail, and now he's the Temp again. He's a slacker who only THINKS he's intelligent because he went to business school. If you work in an office there's bound to be someone who went to school, got a high paying position, and doesn't know jack. But Ryan has pretty eyes, why did mean "new" Jim put his office in a closet!?

His growth has been limited because in society some people don't grow up. It's shocking to see people complain about his lack of growth as a character while failing to recognize the growth in others (also shocking, the lack of complaints about characters like Dwight, Kelly, and Angela, who also have had very little growth). It makes me wonder what fandom thinks growth is, or if what they really want isn't character growth, but character shifts: Their favorites in the spotlight while main characters get reduced to background characters.

Kind of like Heroes. Which most people hate because of the constant character rotation and near stagnancy with said characters while the plot rolls around in circles.

You want to know why most shows stall out after a few years? A lack of forward motion with the relationships and main characters on the show in an attempt to "keep the status quo" and eventually, it just angers the audience because... it's boring.

A stalemate with major characters is what stops a show dead in its tracks. All of these characters should be constantly evolving in one direction or another. For The Office, sometimes that growth comes in the form of a promotion, or a pregnancy; for their audience, that growth comes in acknowledging that maybe their favorite characters aren't as 'awesome' as in the fanfiction they write.

Fringe: Observers of Time

2009-11-23T13:41:00.005-05:00

It's no secret that J. J. Abrams, Alex Kurtzman and Roberto Orci are fans of anything having to do with time. Abrams is the mastermind behind the hit ABC series, Lost, that has spent the last five seasons zipping through time via flashbacks and flash forwards before introducing actual time travel – and all signs point to more time travel and even imaginary timelines (or alternate realities) in the final season starting February 2010.

With Kurtzman and Orci, the trio's new Star Trek movie this past summer literally re-created the franchise utilizing an alternate reality from which they catapulted the rebirth. They've re-launched an old science fiction staple and done with it something rarely seen – turned it into a mainstream commodity. That people are talking of time travel and time jumps within their favorite series not as some clichéd way around problems, but as a curious and interesting way to push forward through the boundaries of storytelling is not only an exemplary achievement, it's exciting.
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Last season, the trio launched the FOX series Fringe, centered on FBI agent Olivia Dunham and her team's experiences with what the show has called "The Pattern" – a series of paranormal events culminating towards something massive. That something, it's been debated within the show, is the battle of two alternate realities over the right to exist. Who wins, and how, remains to be seen, but in all this there are a group of men who've been seemingly given the task of watching these events unfold.

One of these men, called 'Observers', has been photographed at various "Pattern" related incidents, and up until now their involvement has been minimal and mostly through the eyes of Walter Bishop. Many years ago, on a drive with his son Peter, they got into a car accident, from which they were pulled (or at least Walter was) from certain death by an Observer. This past week's episode 'August' began with a different Observer watching over a woman in a park before abducting her. His actions were the first time an Observer has been seen on the show actively participating in his surroundings, as opposed to just watching, so it begs the question: Why now? Why this girl?

The Observers themselves are oblivious as well and the rules are laid out – they observe time as it exists, like watching a movie, and only step in and act to course correct something that, through their observations, they've altered somehow (as with Peter's death). It would seem they are keepers of time, ensuring that the events in their history remain in their history, which implies that – at least in the Fringe world – the history of a world can be changed. Of course, with this ideology comes all the thoughts that predate Fringe through the other realms of Abrams and co, particularly Lost.

Are the Observers simply the end-result of our status quo? From a future world where one of the alternate realities has already won the battle? Or will their changes alter the course of history, leaving them marooned to a different future.

It stands to reason that the future winner of this reality show-down is not ours. Why send observers into the past of the reality that won? Those histories are written in books and taught to school children. The lost history, the history of the civilization that perished, would be far more interesting. What events in our universe were different from theirs; what chain of events lead to our universe ending while theirs continued?

It's obvious that The Pattern is an important chain of events, and for each important chain of events there seems to be an assigned observer. A man (so far) with amplified senses and advanced motor skills who lacks an emotional connection to anyone around them. Similar to the soldiers in Walter's manifesto, possibly the solders that eventually resulted from Walter's manifesto, taken by William Bell to the other side, the Observers can read minds and move at incredible speeds, yet, are incapable of love.

Except that they are. The random kidnapping of Christine becomes far less random once we realize that this particular Observer, named August, has been following the young women from the time she was a girl. Her parents died in a bridge collapse and August – when he realizes that she will die on a flight to Italy – can't let her die twenty years later because he feels something for her. He loves her.

Of course, her life would be an inconsistency in the history, the possibility of a different outcome and the other Observers require that she die to correct it unless, Walter warns, August can find a way to make her important. The complexity of her importance – that she is the reason for the death of an Observer, is understated. It isn't the girl herself, but the feelings she elicits in August, that cause his death. He is compelled not simply to observe, but to act by sacrificing himself, because of his love for Christine (the play on the sacrifice of Christ should not be lost on the audience).

August has observed, and because of him the others have observed to a lesser extent, humanity – something seemingly lost in them – and this humanity will be the path towards a new future. Christine is not the first anomaly. The fact that they have a hired hitman on call implies that the Observers are keen to the fact that they ARE changing something – because it is impossible to observe something without leaving your own mark on it.

Twenty plus years ago Walter got into a car accident – caused by an Observer – that resulted in his son's death. Through some deal made with the Observer sent to observe him and The Pattern, the Peter from an alternate reality was eventually brought into our reality ultimately changing the course of all history. Or did the Observer allow this trade because he knew it was always part of the plan.

Only time will tell.

Gossip Girl: How to Succeed

2009-11-02T18:04:00.007-05:00

Let’s be honest, I started watching Gossip Girl to see beautiful people swan around beautiful places in beautiful clothes getting with other beautiful people. This show did not have a lot to aspire to. Surprise! It vastly exceeded my expectations with its risqué banter, themes of loneliness and popularity, and the dark past of its characters. So, I cast aside my initial evaluation and prepared to enjoy. Surprise! It is now hammy and convoluted. Whether this is due to what many former O.C devotees refer to as the S3 spiral of hell or the much-feared college decline, things have gone badly wrong. So, me being an all-knowing TV goddess (ahem....) I have 5 rules for Josh Schwarz and Stephanie Savage to follow in order to make like Bart Bass and be a bad-ass billionaire successful mofo. *Please kill me now for the mangled, clichéd, and desperate analogy*

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1. Bring Back Original Recipe Blair

Stop exploiting Leighton’s versatility. Just because she has the ability to do comedy, does not mean she should be relegated to these ‘hahaha’ storylines. This whole desperate quest to become Queen of NYU is a) ridiculous as Blair already cast aside her mignons and the Colony Club saying she wasn’t dealing with High School anymore; b) stupid as it’s not funny watching Blair be left lonely after her ‘dastardly scheme’ fails, it’s actually sad.
This whole NYU storyline could have actually given us character development rather than regression. Seeing Blair really struggle with the loss of her identity and status could have been moving as well as interspersed with comedy. We could have seen Blair coping with living with Vanessa, who she sees as the representation of her polar opposite. Imagine how much more poignant the last scene between them where they realise how much they’ve lost and how alike they are would have been. If the writers are looking for drama, rather than using Blair’s schemes to divide her and Chuck and cause the seasonly rift with Serena, why not have her relapse with her bulimia? Chuck is devastated she can’t trust him and Serena is torn between telling her step-brother or keeping Blair’s loyalty. This would utilise Leighton’s dramatic acting ability, incorporate Chuck and relationship drama, be a real issue with Serena that tests their friendship/loyalty/trust, and get the whole cast involved – Cyrus and Eleanor worrying about her, Nate because of his previous history with Blair, and Dan and Vanessa realising Blair is not an evil witch but a real person with insecurities and problems.

2. Stop With The Guest Stars

We know they aren’t sticking around, so there is no point us getting involved in their storylines. Nate’s Romeo/Juliet romance has no credibility as we know Bree is disposable. Ditto Hilary Duff (sorry, I just can’t see her as Olivia, she’ll always be Hilary Duff/Lizzie Maguire to me) and Dan’s relationship. This point is particularly emphasised by Scott. FINE, I’ll concede at least he had a valid reason to be there, but otherwise really, really? They could have at least cast someone attractive and had him even slightly resemble Lily/Rufus. Seriously he looked like the love child of Pete Wentz and Rosario Dawson.
Not only do these guest stars serve almost no purpose but they eat up precious screentime. A few people may tune in to see Hilary Duff and Tyra Banks, but most loyal viewers tune in to see the regulars. They stop the main characters interacting with each other. Nate and Bree seemed to exist in a completely different TV show. People seem to be acting in little 2/3 person bubbles. Where are the scenes from S1 where the NJBC was out in force and sparked off with the Brooklynites? For example a memorable moment would be at the white brunch when Blair told Dan about Serena sleeping with Nate

3. Kill Off Jenny, Rufus, And Vanessa

I feel apathy at best, hatred at worst for these characters. Each one is in their own way completely redundant in Gossip Girl. Rufus/Lily is done. They are married. We do not need to see their pathetic conflicts and Rufus acting like a baby. Vanessa is a judgemental hypocrite. While she is useful as a sounding board for Dan, I feel that the sage advice could just as easily come from Eric, seeing as these two are apparently family though I don’t think they’ve said two words to each other. Use this Van-Hump-Der-Bass family to create original drama/conflict/relationships. Jenny is, like the guest stars, part of completely seperate world to the rest of the main cast. Constance is now OVER, please see Friday Night Lights for the graceful departure of a character - Smash and Jason Street. If Jenny does HAVE to be involved, please give her a bath and a burger. She looks like a crack whore.

4. Storylines With A Point

All that secret child drama for what? A 5 minute reunion where nothing is discussed and consists mainly of Lily reassuring Rufus of his love. Seriously, just watch it.
Carter/Bree WTF?! A family feud involving someone’s sister and an altar and a zzzzzzzz. No one cares nor has this had any real impact on the main characters. Useless, useless, useless.

5. Chuck/Blair White Hot Sex

One of the hottest couples, and yet at most we’ve seen a few kisses. Where are the scenes from last year with the smouldering tension, the partial nudity and heart-breaking emotion? Ok, maybe not heart-breaking (please no break-up/back together drama) but I want to see some passion. I wanted to see the rest of kinky waiter foreplay. I want to see the infamous red tights make a comeback. I want to see how they deal with sex within a committed relationship. And no, I'm not a pervert! Yes, I like the sweetness of Blair cuddling Chuck in bed and the fact that TPTB are trying to show us that they aren’t just about the sex, but I think that was effectively handled last season with the I Love You drama. Also, on that kinda point but not strictly related but what the fuck was that ‘I didn’t say I love you because I couldn’t trust you’ bullshit. Please writers, read your own damn script and watch your own damn show.

So, there you go Gossip Girl. A few hints and pointers from a disappointed viewer. Tell me your problems with the new season. Rant and rave. I like to think the TV Gods will hear our pleas!

The End Is Nigh: Blackout Disaster

2009-10-17T13:43:00.013-04:00

Soooooooooooooo, I have been without my computer/internet/life for nearly a month now (seriously, I KNOW – there should be some sort of condolence card available for the loss of my extra limb) and having not been able to watch any TV – I live in the UK so have to download all the shows I watch – it got me to thinking: When is the worst possible time to cut-off a TV show?

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Friday Night Lights
Before we know whether or not they won/lost the State Championship. Seriously, this would have killed me...the anticipation, the anxiety, the trepidation, the downright desperate desire to know what happened would have given me a cardiac arrest. Would Coach Taylor live his dream? Would Matt Saracen finally prove his worth as QB1? Would I get to see Tim Riggins whip off his shirt in a fit of unbridled joy? Let me hear you say it CLEAR EYES, FULL HEARTS, CAN’T LOSE.

Gossip Girl
Right before the wedding of Chuck Bass and Blair Waldorf. Now, this spot was under stiff competition from ‘Right before the unveiling of Gossip Girl’, but let’s be honest, we know GG is kick-ass (She’s Veronica Mars people, c’mon!) and while she/he/it is intriguing, Chuck and Blair are this antagonistic, conflicted, damaged relationship that in my little shippy heart want to see have the iconic ‘I dos.’ P.S. Sorry about the dodgy manip

One Tree Hill
Please just turn this off. Seriously. Now. I’m not joking. Right now.

Criminal Minds
The Hotch at gun-point by Foyet. Does he live? Does he die? Is he sliced up Boston Reaper style? How are Haley and Jack affected? Or does The Hotch take him down in a tense frenetic battle of the wills and skills?

House
Before we meet Dr. Gregory House. Because then we would never have met him and been introduced into his wonderful miserable, pain-addled, bizarre ‘everybody lies’ world.

Grey’s Anatomy
Before we hear Burke say his vows. *Pre-emptive duck* I know there are so many other moments to pick from – some dramatic, some romantic, some life or death, but in all my life, this has to be the most beautiful set of vows I have ever heard and to be deprived of hearing them would be a true loss.
"I could promise to hold you and to cherish you, I could promise to be there in sickness and in health, I could say till death do us part but I won't. Those vows are for optimistic couples, the ones full of hope and I do not stand here on my wedding day optimistic or full of hope. I am not optimistic I am not hopeful, I am sure. I am steady, and I know that I am a heart man. I take them apart and put them back together, I hold them in my hands. I am a heart man. So this I am sure, you are my partner my lover my very best friend. My heart, my heart beats for you and on this day. The day of our wedding I promise you this. I promise you to lay my heart in the palm of your hands. I promise you me. "

Smallville
Right before the final showdown between Clark Kent, Davis Bloome and Lex Luthor. Now I know what you’re thinking – Why not Superman? Why not Doomsday? Hasn’t Lex died???? OK, first of all, I’m not huge on comic books and due to legal complications, Smallville can’t actually ‘show’ Superman and in Smallville, we see through the eyes of Clark Kent, not Superman. Second, Doomsday can never be killed. Fact. So, the fight would be pretty one-sided. Plus, Sam Witwer is fiiiiiiinnnnnneeee, and I actually laughed out loud at the rubber man ‘DOOMSDAY’ suit, therefore Davis with just the red eyes to show his transformation. Thirdly, I want Michael Rosenbaum back! In my mind, Lex never died! It was all real!Lex’s clever doppelganger fiendish plan.
I want these guys to have a real, honest to god, big fireworks, blood dripping, humanity in peril, evil versus good, up-tempo rock anthem playing, FIGHT! And with their shirts off, did you say?? Yes, I’m in totally agreement! LET'S GET NEKKID! *Dribble dribble*

The Wire
Ever. Seriously, the greatest TV series that has ever ended. Oh, if it could have lived forever. However, it kind of does because it was so true to life, it was almost a documentary and to this day I imagine the lives of new Avons, Stringers, Omars, Marlos, Kimas, Rhondas on the streets and in the offices of Baltimore.

So, what about you? Your worst TV disasters? Has technology ever failed you at a critical moment?
Share with me – Misery Loves Company!

The Office: The Wedding Countdown Begins!

2009-10-01T15:47:00.000-04:00

Watch this post--we'll keep updating it--for all the info from now on involving Jim and Pam's wedding. Last things first? We've got a lot to catch up on!

Updated 10/1: Here's a new promo showing Pam getting all giddy about cashing a check.

Previously posted info under the cut.

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First of all, here's a non-spoilery promo guaranteed to tug your heartstrings without spilling the beans:

Kristin's minions put a video up this evening of behind-the-scenes Jam wedding goodness:

There's also the small matter of THE COVER OF ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY, BITCHES!

The cover story of EW this week is about the wedding, and it's pretty spoilery. We learn that Jim gives a very touching speech at the rehearsal dinner, one that would be flawlessly romantic if it weren't for the fact that he apparently spills the beans about the baby about one day too soon. To make matters worse, looks like Michael is the one who tries to save Jim from total epic fail territory--but of course, this is only going to get The Most Awesome TV Groom Ever in even hotter water. Since we know one of the lines from his speech is, "People told me it was crazy to wait that long for a date with a girl I worked with, but I think even then, I knew I was waiting for my wife," I think we (and Pam!) will probably be willing to let him and his loose lips off the hook. There are also some pretty terrific behind-the-scenes videos of John Krasinski and Jenna Fischer at their EW photoshoot--you can watch those here.

We know the details now about their bridal attire, which you can read about here.

We also know that after the wedding, it's looking pretty likely that Michael's going to be hooking up with Pam's mom, so, y'know, cringe and wait for the "your baby will be my grandchild" jokes. (Yeah, if the old watchword was bastard--thanks, Angela!--then the new watchword is Grandpa.)

What's even more exciting is that, for Jim and Pam, the wedding is only the first in what's bound to be a season full of juicy Jam stories, as we anticipate the birth of their baby in February. (Oh, and PS, I'm reminding Mindy Kaling via Twitter just about every day that said baby has to be a girl. Join in on the harassment if you wish.)

Pilot News: Jabrams & Co. Getting Back in the Spy Biz!

2009-10-01T14:00:00.000-04:00

As we celebrate the anniversary of Alias's first episode, it is fitting that word got out yesterday that J.J. Abrams, the man who thought, "Hey, let's do a show about a kickass spy," is currently developing a new hour-long series based around the concept of a married couple who spies together.

Described as lighter fare than his most famous projects offer, this series sounds a little like a brighter version of Mr. and Mrs. Smith.

Couple of thoughts--

Jabrams's most enduring series have been those with heavy plots and a side of romance. People forget that he was also behind the short-lived Six Degrees and What About Brian, both of which were practically intolerable. This series is being billed as an "action-adventure-romance." And with the main characters already coupled up, I'm skeptical about the potential OTPness of the whole thing.

That said, with the right leads with the right kind of chemistry (could Nathan Fillion get out of Castle for this?) and really strong writing, this sounds like an interesting concept. And of course I'll give anything from Bad Robot the benefit of the doubt.

Lost & Sesame Street: Brought to You By the Numbers...

2009-10-01T12:00:00.000-04:00

My Google Alerts went nutso yesterday when a press release went out stating that Matthew Fox will be a guest on this season of Sesame Street. There's really not much to say here, expect that it's going to be pretty freaking exciting. Though we hardly think that Sesame Street will tackle Lost's complex themes, many of which are geared toward audiences older than pre-schoolers, it's always interesting and amusing to see how the children's show simplifies the concepts of grown-up dramas for its young viewers. It probably goes straight over the kids' heads, but at least their parents--and the fangirls watching mid-morning PBS--will be entertained.

For instance, here's their recent parody of Mad Men, in which the titled is translated quite literally as the muppets explore different emotions, including mad:

"Good work, sycophants," also cracks me the hell up.

So what will Foxy's appearance include? Maybe he will literally be lost on Sesame Street, and it can be a lesson in what to do if you get separated from your mommy. Maybe he'll play doctor and show the kids how to put on Band-Aids.

Or maybe Big Bird will be conned by Oscar the Grouch to climb to the rooftop of Mr. Hooper's Store. (Oscar would do it himself but he can't leave the can.) And of course Big Bird will fall off the roof into a crumpled heap of feathers on the sidewalk of Sesame Street. Somehow, Oscar will get Big Bird to Jack, who will do his best to save Big Bird, even going so far as to transfuse him with his own blood. (The episode could be brought to you by the letter O Negative.) Just before Jack goes to amputate Big Bird's leg, Big Bird decides to let Doc off the hook. He dies, tragically; his dying words are, "Tell Snuffy..."

Unfortunately, Snuffleupagus is off having a sexy picnic with Sayid.

YEAH. I SAID IT.

Friends: Epic Musical Reunion!

2009-10-01T10:58:00.002-04:00

On Tuesday, Courteney Cox and Lisa Kudrow were on hand at a charity concert to introduce Sheryl Crow. Unfortunately, Sheryl found she had a tough act to follow after an audience member shouted out "Smelly Cat!" Lisa indulged the audience and performed a few bars of her classic hit.

Love it!

Source: Just Jared

Alias: Happy Anniversary, Vaughns!

2009-10-01T10:00:00.000-04:00

Eight years ago, Sydney Bristow became a double agent, with Michael Vaughn assigned as her handler. Thus began two epic relationships--theirs, and my relationship with Alias.

Damn, I feel old.

Glee: Of Roads Not Taken, Bowling as Foreplay, and Epic Broadway Collaborations

2009-10-01T08:00:00.000-04:00

It has come to my attention that a lot of the people who appreciate television romances also appreciate things like Broadway musicals and Taylor Swift songs. I'm not trying to speak for everyone, as I'm sure there are plenty of people who love them some TV but found themselves on Team Kanye, but it seems that enjoying plot expressed in lyrics and melody is something many fangirls have in common.

So you can imagine how unsurprising I find it that Glee has quickly become a show with a strong and active fandom.

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Yesterday's episode was quite good, even if it was the third straight episode centering around somebody quitting Glee.

"The Rhodes Not Taken" had good romantic development on all fronts, with Finn and Rachel sharing another kiss and Will and Emma having their first disagreement. It was the first episode in which I really felt engaged in the Finn/Rachel dynamic (has "Finchel" caught on yet?), as allllll that angst landed on them.

Finally, as always, the strongest part of the episode was undoubtedly the music. Not only did this episode dispense with the dream sequence numbers--all of these numbers were legitimately being performed--but they also, of course, featured the megatalented Emmy-winning actress, Kristin Chenoweth, for whom, incidentally, my sister claims she would go gay.

Her numbers, particularly the duet with Rachel, "Maybe This Time," were pitch-perfect, ranging from the forlorn "Alone" to Carrie Underwood's bouncy "Last Name." All of them were thoroughly delightful.

What was perhaps most poignant about her guest appearance was how it led to the absolutely show-stopping final number, "Somebody to Love." With Rachel back in Glee, the club performed their first song as a group since the newbies joined up. It was nothing short of incredible, with just about everyone rocking a solo. Of course, the song belonged to Finn and Rachel, who showed their onstage chemistry with not only some pretty outstanding vocals, but choreography that was oh-so-reminiscent of their first outing in "Don't Stop Believing."

Lastly, if you had told me a year ago, as I baked a cake while listening to the Spring Awakening, Hairspray, and You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown cast recordings, that I would one day watch Lea Michele, Matthew Morrison, and Kristin Effing Chenoweth do such a pitch-perfect project together--and one that would set Trending Topics afire, no less!--I would have slapped you in the face. And not just because a year ago I had no idea what Twitter was.

Gossip Girl: Van der Humphreys: Imminent

2009-10-01T06:57:00.003-04:00

So. In my fandom closet, I have a long history with soap operas. And right at the top of that list is Jake and Vicky on Another World. You know, before AW got cancelled and their characters were moved to another show, where they were both eventually killed off.

How, you ask, is this remotely relevant? Because back in the day, their big, splashy, on-location wedding was shot at the Brooklyn Botanic Garden.

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So, naturally, when I saw the paparazzi pictures of the Gossip Girl cast filming at the Botanic Garden, my brain went, “Ooooh! Wedding!” Which I then realized was ridiculous, because the GG cast filming somewhere in fancy clothes is proof of absolutely nothing.

But lo and behold, the title for episode 3x05 is “Rufus Getting Married.” Yay!

I’m always surprised when I read comments online that people don’t care about Rufus and Lily. Really? Because I think they’re adorable. Maybe there’s less story potential for them now that they’re getting married, but I love them together. When they’re not having the same fight over and over. I don’t even care that their wedding squickily makes OTP Dan and Serena step-siblings.

Here’s a thought: Does the Van der Humphrey union mean the end of the Brooklyn loft? Or, more importantly, the end of those absurdly quick and convenient trips back and forth between Brooklyn and the Upper East Side?

The Stepdad Rufus potential looks to be really sweet, too. I love that he wants to be a real dad in the string of Lily’s husbands. I don’t read many GG spoilers beyond these set pictures. But I can only hope that Papa Van der Woodsen will surface soon, leading to all kinds of chaos, drama, and fatherhood smackdowns.

Bones: Some of Us Are Patient. Some of Us Are Not.

2009-09-30T22:57:00.004-04:00

Now that Booth and Brennan seem like they're finally at least on the getting-together path (however long that path may be), Bones has become somewhat of a waiting game. And while the fandom seems content--at least for now--to wait this one out, they're not quite so patient in other respects. Right now, for instance, I'm sitting here at my computer watching the Bones fandom flail around me as the ladies wait--perhaps in vain--for the elusive illegal Canadian upload links.

It's an interesting phenomenon, this Bones-from-Canada thing. It could be argued that this activity is hurting the show in the long run, as potential Thursday night viewers are tuning in to commercial-free streaming video online the night before; it could also be argued that the Canadian preview night is helping sneak-peekers promote the show on Thursday, before it airs in America to presumably more viewers.

I will admit that I usually watch the night before, and have thus far not watched or DVRed the show on Fox. But many fangirls do not fall into this category. Indeed, it must be true that most of the people willing to hit refresh, refresh, refresh after 11:00 eastern time just to watch the episode 20 hours in advance are probably going to want to see it on their larger screen and DVR it for posterity ... or just freeze-framing a Booth/Brennan brush-pass.

For me, the benefit of watching the night before is simple--I don't like other people knowing things before I do. I am a knowledge control freak. And anyway, you're bound to get spoiled on Twitter at some point on Thursday, so it's also a preventative measure. Thirdly, my Thursday nights are effing crowded, so getting Bones out of the way on Wednesdays is pretty much the only reason why I'm actually watching Bones at all.

When Fandoms Collide

2009-09-30T09:19:00.004-04:00

One of the most fun things about fandom is when two (or more!) of them collide. Sometimes this happens in-canon, like when Lost shockingly married Kate Austen off to Mal Reynolds/Captain Hammer/Johnny from Two Guys, a Girl, and a Pizza Place.

And sometimes, you have to use your imagination.

Like when Addison Montgomery and Temperance Brennan shared the cover of TV Guide last year. An inquisitive fangirl imagines how ridiculous such a crossover would look if it really happened. As I said then, "It always gets me in a good mood seeing my favorite characters from different television universes get together for one fantastic adventure or just a TV Guide photo shoot."

So one can imagine how sillyface I find this breast cancer awareness PSA from Funny or Die:

THE BOOBY SCARE Featuring Alyson Hannigan, Emily Deschanel, Kat McPhee, Minka Kelly and Jaime King - watch more funny videos

Because that's basically Bones, Lily Aldrin, and Lila Garrity feeling each other up.

I'm just waiting for the icons.

The Big Bang Theory: Somewhere Here There's a "Small Bang" Joke

2009-09-30T07:00:00.001-04:00

On Monday night's The Big Bang Theory, the gang explored something significantly less novel that the writers probably think it is: boring first-time sex.

This plotline was tired when it happened to Ed and ~~Sarah Shephard~~ Carol on Ed six years ago. Yeah, in the fourth season, they finally did it, with disappointing results. It was only after they decided to be Just Friends, thus removing the pressure to perform, that they had the good sex and realized they'd prefer to do that some more rather than call it quits.

Literally the exact same plotline we saw on TBBT on Monday.

I mean, if you think back, even Ross and Rachel got off to a rocky start. I'm sure y'all can name even more examples of sitcom couples who took two tries to get it right.

The one thing I will say in favor of The Big Bang Theory is that even when it brings harried plotlines, it adds a level of delight by including some truly funny jokes, including the following winner from Sheldon:

"If you people spent less time thinking about sex and more time concentrating on comic books, we'd have far fewer of these embarrassing moments."

Also, I really hate Lewis Black. Why must he insist on talking in such a hateful tone? I am such a fangirl for Jon Stewart, but even I fast-forward through his insufferable segments. He is an intolerable man, and I hope he had a spider in his collection that paralyzed his character and then he got buried alive.

Lost: I Believe I Heard Something About Jack and Kate?

2009-09-29T22:42:00.005-04:00

So the Lost season six news is finally picking up, and there's excitement to be had! Of course, if you know me, you also know that that could only mean one thing...

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Jate's back, people!

Yes, Matthew Fox and Evangeline Lilly have been spotted several times on set together--including once to film a touchy-feeling kind of scene:

"Jack and Kate appear to hug/kiss or something and hold hands but it was hard to make out all the detail," says one of DarkUFO's sources. Forget how excited I am about the possibility of hugging and kissing--HAND-HOLDING??!!?

As we all know, Jack and Kate are the rulers of tactile romance. Who could forget the epic glass!hands scene in "I Do," which is TOTALLY the most romantic scene in that episode, amirite?

Or how about the even more epic graspy!hands scene in "The Man From Tallahassee," which is basically as close as two people can come to saying "I love you" without actually using the words?

And, y'know, there's always the classic grabby!hands scenes in "There's No Place Like Home," where Jack refuses to let Kate get left behind by the chopper.

So, yeah, I'm jazzed about the possibility of adding one of those to the list. Hugging-slash-kissing doesn't hurt, either.

All in all, we still have no idea what to expect from Lost's sixth and final season. Spoilers seem to indicate now that rather than a standalone "course correction" premiere showing what would have happened had Oceanic 815 not crashed, we'll instead be seeing a full-on alternate timeline--or three. It appears that the premiere will pick up in three separate years: in 2007 with Sun, Fake Locke, Ben, and the new people; in 1977 with the aftermath of the Jughead explosion; and in 2004 with the safe arrival of Flight 815 to LAX. The photo shown above suggests that Jack and Kate share screentime at the airport in Los Angeles (notice their crashwear). Whether this is a casual brush-pass as they gather their stuff at baggage claim or an epic aiding-and-abetting situation has yet to be determined. Either way, I'm excited.

Some shippers, including myself, are fearful of the possibility of Kate ending up with Sawyer in one timeline and Jack in the other. However, I remain optimistic for two reasons. One is that the timelines will eventually have to converge and she'll still have to end up picking one. Second, I'm still hopeful that they'll use the alternate universe to further pursue the concept of fate, ultimately giving Jaters (of course, Jaters) the satisfaction of knowing that our OTP is, in fact, totally fate. Like in that Gwyneth Paltrow movie, Sliding Doors, where she ends up with John Hannah in both timelines. Except the epic Lost version.

In other unrelated-to-Jate Lost fandom news, check out the bitchin' cookie cutters I just bought:

I am imagining a party in which I serve airplane cookies decorated to look like Oceanic 815 (and, of course, broken in half). And look how easy it would be to slice off that thumb with a knife and make a perfect four-toed foot cookie. WHO WOULDN'T WANT A FOUR-TOED FOOT COOKIE?

Lost: Look Who's in the Premiere!

2009-09-29T17:05:00.004-04:00

An interesting Lost tidbit under the cut!

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That's right, y'all! DarkUFO confirmed that Desmond is indeed in the season six premiere.

Not exactly sure what that means (especially since if they're working the reset idea, Desmond would theoretically be shot back to the island), but I like it!

(More Lost flailing later tonight.)

Doctor Who: A Message to Lead Myself Here (Plus a General Message to Lead Y'all Here)

2009-09-29T00:05:00.004-04:00

Hello, everybody! Yes, we know, we've been way too quiet this season. We have a couple of decent reasons--one is that I think we've all taken on a lot of TV this season ... [crickets] Just me, then? With all the watching I've been doing, I barely have time to digest it, let alone discuss it coherently. By the time I can even get the words, "Oh, my God, why didn't they use 'Bones and Booth fix the plumbing' as an excuse to throw a wet T-shirt contest?" out of my mouth, it's time to move on to, "Holy crap, Fringe really is using the same house as in "Home.'"

The other reason is Twitter. It's so easy to have a squee freakout in 140 characters! I can spaz about Jim's Office promotion and then move seamlessly into a brief analysis of Derek and Meredith's Grey's sexcapades.

(You can follow me on Twitter here, by the way.)

Anyway, from now on, I'm going to try to post very regularly, expanding upon my tweets of glee and bringing the fangirl flailing back where it belongs -- Chaos in General.

Our first piece of excitement comes, shockingly, from my real life. The University I attended for my Bachelor's is not my favorite place in the world. I could write a dictionary-length diatribe about my hatred of the school and the people who work there--and often, the people who attend there, too. See, my opinion of the student body is that they're selfish, overprivileged, and paying way too much for both their crappy education and their designer leggings.

And then today, I look out the window of a classroom and I see this:

Oh my gosh, when did this school get witty nerds!?!

For those unfamiliar with the awesome signified by Bad Wolf, it refers to an important part of Doctor Who, most often associated with Rose Tyler. The Bad Wolf loomed large over the first season of the modern series, with the words showing up all over the adventures of The Doctor and Rose. It was only in the first season finale that the true meaning became apparent--Rose herself was the Bad Wolf, scattering the words throughout the universe to lead her and The Doctor to that moment: "I am the Bad Wolf. I create myself. I take the words. I scatter them ... in time, and space. A message to lead myself here."

The words continued to appear randomly throughout the next few seasons, a consistent if not constant reminder of the connection between Rose and The Doctor--and always a nice throwback to the sacrifices made in "The Parting of the Ways." Putting up the words "Bad Wolf" in huge letters on the wall of the Academic Center (and seriously, that had to take a good long while) is not only a nod to Doctor Who, but it's a deeper, more clever reference, since it used it in a way the canon would have used it to signify something important, as if Rose Tyler herself had actually scattered the phrase onto the campus. What I'm saying is if they had just thrown up the word "Dalek," I would have chuckled, but I probably wouldn't have felt the need to pull out my Blackberry and take a picture.

So not only did I "Oh, my God!" in an otherwise quiet room, my faith was restored that there actually are, as I said, witty nerds in my presence.

This witty nerd will be back tomorrow with quick updates about more stuff in need of a good flail. (Like The Office.)

True Blood: The Stand Out Episode

2009-09-21T17:02:00.007-04:00

Every TV series has that one episode that everyone remembers, that provides mass debate and discussion and that is the authoritative commentary on what the show is about. For True Blood, I think that episode is 2-9 ‘I Will Rise Up.’

What a fantastic episode! I honestly think this the definitive, game-changing episode of the season and possibly the series. There is just so much to say about this episode – the storylines, the cinematography, the characters and the wider implications for the vampire/human world.

OK, while I obviously understand that TV is fiction and purely a method of entertainment, I take TV seriously and am emotionally and mentally invested in the shows I watch and over analyse anything and everything (hence this blog!). So while one could take True Blood at face value as a sexy Southern vampire show and the episode as just part of the ‘story’, I was thinking about why this episode is so revolutionary. Eventually I came to the conclusion that it was the ‘message’ of this episode. I could try to clumsily explain but I think it is best expressed by Jung “The sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being.” This episode has relevance and meaning for not just the world of vampires, but the world of man and the reason for humanity.

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But before we delve into the deep end, let’s take a swim in the shallow end of the pool. I have two words for you - Alexsander Skaarsgard. Oh. My. Good. Lord. What a delicious man!*Jumps out pool* So, back on topic *sigh*, the dream sequence between Sookie and Eric. This has stirred up mass debate and conflict. Many were put off by this new ‘schmoopy’ Eric, arguing that it was completely out-of-character for Eric and was honestly just quite cheesy. However, we must remember that this is Sookie’s dream i.e. this is how Sookie imagines Eric in bed. For me the most powerful moment between Sookie and Eric was the moment where they just lightly brush hands when Eric leaves Godric with Sookie. So much was said and unsaid in that tiny touch, in that infinitesimal caress.

Forget Bill and Sookie. Forget Eric and Sookie. The hottest new vampire/human couple in town is Hoyt and Jessica. Their sweetness factor is through.the.roof. It’s just such a cute tale of first love, but it’s not all sugar and spice. They’re going through some real difficulties but what I love about them is they don’t just use it as an excuse to break up and create more drama, they deal with it together and are growing up. In this episode, they are fighting the bigotry and hate of Mrs Foytenberry who is used as a foil to show us the bigotry and hate of the outside world. Their relationship shows us the ‘real’ issues a vampire/human couple face. Through their ‘supernatural’ problems, like Jessica’s hymen growing back, we glimpse into how they are as a couple and people and how together they work to find a solution. Too often with vampires, we assume they are these superior beings, but with Jessica we see she is just a scared teenage girl and through this, we glimpse their humanity.

There was FINALLY delevopment for the storyline of Maryann. If it wasn’t for the phenomenal work done by Michelle Forbes, to be honest I would FF through the Maryann scenes because there has seemed to be such little reason for this arc. You know I thought I would never hear these words out of my mouth but Jeez, am I glad there are no more orgies – seriously they were getting boooorrrrrrriiiiinnnnngggg. Now, this could have been deliberate storytelling by the writers to show us the banality of excess, but I’m slightly sceptical. In this episode, we were actually shown a glimpse into her psyche and what drives her.

However let’s get down to the real nitty-gritty. For me, Godric’s death is the most important event in the True Blood verse. I was struck by how delicately this was handled. I’m not sure how this event can be topped in terms of impact and emotion.

First we have the powerful imagery and cinematography. The sight of this child burning alive in blue flames against the background of the dusky dawn and the unknowing city. The audience were granted a rare chance in seeing someone with the utmost dignity sacrifice himself towards God. We saw this formidable 1000 year old ‘super human’ alight due to the effect of the sun next to this tiny innocent girl who stood by unharmed. It showed the true weakness of vampires – they are ultimately the dark.

This idea of light/dark is highlighted by the use of the Christian message of love and forgiveness. While I don’t want to get too over-involved in the discussion of religion (too many foot/mouth moments), I leave it to you to draw your own conclusions, I will underscore the different ways religion in particular the concept of sacrifice was portrayed. We had the act of war with Luke with the bomb, the frenzy of pagan excess with Maryann and the town; and then we had Godric, truly offering himself, still, willing and the true meaning of awe-some as in awe inspiring, breathtaking act of sacrifice.

One of the ways I think True Blood differentiates itself from other vampire shows, is that it not only tells us what it is to be a vampire, but what it is to be human. Alan Ball explores Life and all it means. Godric says “Why would you be so cruel?” when Eric is trying to convince him to live. For all the vampire benefits, the one that is the most sought after is eternal life. But through that one question, we see that life without end is meaningless and actually ‘cruel.’ We see the ultimate irony of how eternal life is perceived as heaven but in reality is the complete opposite - hell. Godric genuinely longs for mortality, for time with meaning, for life with meaning, for death with meaning. I believe in his last moments, like Pinocchio, Godric was bestowed the girft of life. Maybe not in body, but in soul. Where he expresses surprise in Sookie’s empathy – me=floods of tears. I hate to be all pretentious and slightly lazy by using a quote but Richter expresses eloquently what I am clumsily trying to explain “Humanity is never so beautiful as when praying for forgiveness, or else forgiving another.” Godric and Sookie were truly never so exquisite as that fateful morning.

“I’m scared for you”. This quote shows us why Sookie is the bomb. A lot of people have criticised the character of Sookie, and while she has her faults, I think this episode shows her best nature and why Bill and Eric are so fascinated with her because at her core she is a compassionate soul, which both of them have so little experience of. She is so novel to them in their world of night, ego and cruelty. Particularly to Bill from what we have seen in his flashbacks with Lorena.

Ah, Lorena. Psychopathic bitch that she is, we see a certain, if not love, then bond with Bill. This bond of maker/makee is explored in the episode. We have the contrast of Bill/Lorena and Bill/Jessica compared to Eric/Godric. Bill and Jessica were both unwilling and their ‘turnings’ were violent, dark struggles. However, Eric sees Godric as his personal saviour, as his own god. This is almost reversed at Godric’s death. Godric till the very end is astounded and in awe of Eric’s vitality. The fact that Godric knows Eric still has ‘life’ left in him and so commanded him to leave is testament to their love and loyalty. We see their different outtakes on life - Godric is weighed by the burden of his years, Eric still has his joie de vivre and this ultimate disparity is encapsulated by their exchange: Eric “I would fight you now if I could.” Godric “I know.” It’s beautiful and reminds us of their history as warriors. They were not just brothers-in-arms, they are each others “Father, Brother, Child.” Godric says he’ll be all those things, and at the very end he is all those things to Eric and vice versa. The caress by Godric says it all. Such tenderness and hope. If anyone doubts whether vampires have feelings, this must surely prove otherwise.

And last but certainly not least, I must praise the acting in this episode which was absolutely stellar, in particular by Anna Paquin and Allan Hyde. Their exchange on the roof should be the one they both put in for the Emmys.

So, there you have it, my long, convoluted explanation of why you MUST MUST MUST watch True Blood, if not at least this episode. Cast aside your preconceptions of a vampire show, Twilight this certainly ain’t!!!

Fall Season 2009: FlashForward

2009-09-19T22:36:00.004-04:00

I’m a fan of Lost, Heroes, Alias, Fringe, X-Files – any story that can blend a little (or a lot) of science fiction and time travel into a complex and mysterious serial drama, and I’m sold. So it says something when I have to stop getting excited for FlashForward to take a deep breath and remind myself that these types of shows fail to deliver (except Farscape, bless you).

I often get the feeling that the show writers are a bit confused themselves. The starting idea is brilliant, they love their characters, and they keep a little something out of the mix to help stir things up in season two and three... and then, the flame sort of sizzles and you’re left with Alias’ Elixir of Life, or in the case of X-Files, some overly complex, muddled plot that involved bees, Super Soldiers and The Syndicate, I think?

Heroes is resetting again, apparently unable to build upon the season before and once more wiping the slate clean (not that I can blame them). Lost is nearing its finish line, and I am more and more convinced that we’ll be left with a lot of unanswered questions and a fairly unsatisfactory answer as to what the island actually is. And you can tell JJ and team learned because they started to go down the same path with Fringe and all of a sudden it was like someone smart finally said, “you know, let’s just get to the damn point and tell them there’s an alternate universe.” Thank you, Someone Smart!

The thing is, I like science fiction and time travel and complex and mysterious storylines. I like fully fleshed out characters and confusing relationships. But if I am going to commit to watching your show weekly, and hang on for the ride season after season to the finish, is it too much to also ask for a well crafted show arc? I want to think and question and be surprised when there are twists and also satisfied when there are answers. Hell, I’d be more proud to be a fan of writers that thought out a brilliant six seasons and just walked away at the end of their contract instead of getting reeled in by the network that decided they wanted to milk more from the cash cow.

So please forgive me if despite my excitement for FlashForward, I’m coming into it a little hesitant. I have no doubts the first season will be brilliant, but there will be ranting like no other if this show goes the way of most.

Now, all that said, here’s why I actually think this show is going to ROCK YOUR SOCKS OFF:

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1. I read the book, and though I already know the two aren’t going to be alike in much more than a layer of primer, the book was thought provoking and romantic (I know). It was the usual fate vs. free will main plot, but the subplot was all about reality now vs. reality future, relationships and hope. They also announced at Comic-Con that the novelist, Robert J. Sawyer, will pen one of the episodes.

2. Unlike the book, the “flash forward” takes everyone to April 29, 2010. For a television series, putting the flash 21 years in the future isn’t nearly as exciting, so good move there. What will happen when we hit the date? Or the better question, what will happen after?

3. It’s almost like the writers know the Lost fans are going to watch but are also coming in slightly bitter and suspicious, heh. They have already confirmed that we will not be facing “Island Time” with this series. It will progress in normal time. Praise be!

4. It has an impressive cast; among them, Joseph Fiennes, John Cho, Jack Davenport, Gabrielle Union, and Losties Dominic Monaghan and Sonya Walger.

5. The writers have a five season arc (22 episodes each). And that means it will have continuity that actually makes sense, and satisfactory answers to questions that were set up episodes or seasons before. Hello! Music to my ears. Please stay true to this and I may actually have one additional show to add to my Best Shows Evar!1 list (hi, Farscape - also seriously, you all need to see this).

Unlike Lost, where a bracelet worn by two women and deliberately shown in one episode is there to MEAN NOTHING (argh, rant), Robert J. Sawyer himself had this to say about FlashForward, "I've had very fascinating conversations with David [Goyer, executive producer] about things that we're putting in the pilot that we hope most people won't notice, but are there so that when we play that card 10 episodes or five seasons down the road, nobody will be able to go back and say, 'That wasn't set up properly,'" Sawyer said. "That's the level at which this show is being thought out."

Guys, it might just make me cry of happy.

Season One premiers in the U.S. on September 24th.

Fringe - New Season: New World

2009-09-18T18:37:00.006-04:00

Any fan of JJ Abrams can tell you that he has a penchant for creating female leads struggling between two worlds. With 'Felicity' there was Felicity's conflict between becoming the doctor her father expected her to be, and becoming the artist her heart wanted to be.

In 'Alias' there was Sydney's battle between remaining a secret government agent to make the world a better place and becoming a regular woman, wife and mother, to live the life she'd always dreamt of.

On 'Lost' there is Kate's choice between playing into the bad girl fugitive lifestyle she thinks she deserves and being the good and happy family woman she desires to be.

With 'Fringe' there is literally a female lead struggling between two worlds.

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The season one finale saw Olivia mysteriously escape into an alternate universe, of which we know very little, and the premier skipped past the events of her time there and thrust her, literally, back into this one with veiled memories of her meeting with Walter Bishop's previous partner, William Bell, among - possibly - other things.

The questions of how she got there, how she got back, what exactly happened to her during that time, who is this shape shifting soldier after her, and what do they want with her will be the context of the rest of this season. It is curious that she woke only when Peter sat at her bedside (much like she telepathically lit the lights on the puzzle last season with Peter standing behind her) and the words she muttered – in Greek – were words Peter's mother, an unseen force thus far in this story, used to recite to Peter on a daily basis.

Be a better man than your father.

The frustration of a show like this is speculation. Did Olivia meet Peter's mother? Or did Olivia somehow tap into some memory in the recesses of Peter's mind? And if she did, why? Is there some bond between them that allows her to tap into her powers? What exactly IS her power? The video of her as a child seemed to suggest – when compared to the images of Mr. Jones' artificially created time/space jump location from the prison cell – that she had herself made some sort of possibly natural time/space jump.

By doing so, did Olivia create the alternate universe that is predicted to destroy ours?

Or did she simply travel there? (Since they opened the doors to it -- Is our Olivia really OUR Olivia -- or did each universe's Olivia switch over? And while we're at it, just how alike ARE the two worlds? Is there a second Walter? Or is William Bell REALLY that world's Walter Bishop?) And will Peter eventually be forced to see Olivia as an experiment in order to prevent that from happening?

Alternate universes are an old staple of science fiction, and that Fringe comes from the same people who have more recently created 'Lost' and the newest 'Star Trek' movie, it brings to mind the same themes those works emphasize: fate and destiny and free will and the consequences that each brings.

And it brings us back to choices. If Olivia does have the ability to transport herself between the universes, is the proverbial grass greener on the other side? Does she have the responsibility to put Peter back in his universe? Or was it his destiny to be in ours? Most importantly though, does Olivia have the power to decide which universe survives the impending merge? Or does she have the ability to seal the alternate worlds permanently from one another.

And what are the consequences of it all?

At the heart of all these things is one woman with very real feelings and very real connections to the people around her – whether they are from this dimension or another – and the knowledge that her actions could put any one of them in danger, or eradicate them from existence will weigh heavy on her shoulders. But is it any different from her situation now?

One could argue that Olivia wants the same things Felicity, Sydney and Kate wanted before her: the freedom to choose the life she leads. To not have extenuating circumstances and the aspirations of others direct her paths, and to be able to ultimately walk away from the path her life had been on towards what she truly wants. And what Olivia wants is, whether you deem it to be misogynistic or a natural instinct, to be a regular ol' mom in an ordinary world.

Her character came to life midway through the first season with the introduction of her sister and niece, and she is most human, most empathetic, when she's cutting loose in those few moments outside of work, most especially with Peter and her niece. Her line of work, you could say, is what Walter Bishop and William Bell engrained in her as a child – the rules of some imaginary future army (much like Sydney Bristol in 'Alias') that would be beckoned when the time was right. Her life has become the byproduct of that.

But is that her destiny? Does she walk the fine line between these worlds protecting them both as some sort of superhuman soldier? Or can she walk away, creating a new life – a new dimension of herself.

It's a good thing we have another season to get closer to that answer.
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Bones: Are Our Psychic Powers Stronger Than Cyndi Lauper's?

2009-09-16T10:29:00.004-04:00

Must a girl do everything herself around here?

I haven't blogged about Bones all summer, a feat I'd feel more proud of if I had blogged about a ton of other things all summer. But now, with the premiere airing ~~tonight~~ "tomorrow," we've got tons to talk about.

And even if I am abstaining from Bones flailing--no, really, I am, ask anyone--that doesn't mean I don't see and hear things, and it doesn't mean my brain stops theorizing. Better to get these things on the blog (or at least out of Twitter) before the premiere airs.
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Okay, here's what we know.

Cyndi Lauper's in ~~tonight's~~ "tomorrow's" premiere, playing Angela's psychic. She's involved with the case--which the critics agree is about as crucial to this episode as it was in "Critic in the Cabernet"--but the real intrigue of Avalon Harmonia is what she theorizes about Booth and Brennan. The opening scene, we think, is Avalon reading Brennan's tarot cards. She ruminates:

"I see a sick man in the hospital. He takes refuge in a dream life. You're there, in the dream, and you're helping him to create that dream life by telling him a story. You're both so happy in the story, so happy it's almost sad when he wakes up.... The man whose life you saved is really excited to see you again."

Brennan, of course, dismisses this, but it's hard for us, the audience, not to believe Avalon may be on to something when we see a following clip, in which Booth greets Brennan in her office with a hug and a very happy face.

From promos, we know that Brennan does have a fight scene, presumably the scripted one in the clinic that was also scripted to end in Booth rescuing--and then making out with--Brennan at the crime scene. (At this point, all signs point to that having been Hart messing with the fans, and I would be incredibly impressed if he managed to pull off hiding that big of a reveal.) We know there is a kiss of some kind, however, though we've been told that it's a mere forehead kiss.

I know a lot of fangirls who were disappointed by that, and to that I have two important points. #1: I learned the hard way, never get too excited about a Bones storyline that seems whoa obvious. And #2: This could actually be a really good thing.

Because we saw a little split-second scene of them on the street, in which Brennan jokes, "Do you want me to kiss you on the forehead?" and Booth agrees, closing his eyes and leaning toward her. She laughs it off, but we guess Booth's request was an effort to prove or disprove something Avalon said regarding the pair's relationship. We assume that later in the episode (perhaps once he's saved her?), she'll actually give him that forehead kiss, and it will validate for Booth whatever he's confused about. The point being, Booth doesn't need a crime scene PDA to prove what he feels for Brennan is real; it's even more poignant to show that he gets all fluttery inside just from a kiss to the forehead.

Speaking of Booth being confused, we know from another clip (also in the YouTube video above) that Sweets is trying to push Booth to revisit the feelings evoked from the "coma dream." Putting together a few key pieces of intel, it seems like Booth is having regular brain scans, and Sweets is analyzing them, in conjunction with therapy, to help Booth get back to normal. The joke I've been using is, Sweets says to Booth, in a different turn of phrase, "This is your brain. This is your brain on Brennan." We love what Cam tells Booth at the bar (heard on audio clips): "Be sure about your feelings, because if you crack that shell and you change your mind, she'll die of loneliness before she'll trust anyone ever again."

We also know, from the last clip included in that YouTube montage, that Brennan is familiar with this "coma dream" business. (Sorry, that's still hard to type without air quotes.) Booth knows she wrote it as part of her book. Whether we actually see a scene where they put these pieces together, or whether we get the idea that they talked about it before she fled to Guatemala, has yet to be determined. I think far more interesting that what Booth subconsciously experienced while under the knife is what Brennan consciously typed while sitting in his hospital room.

I think the end scene will be Booth coming to the realization that he definitely feels something epic for Brennan. It'll hit him like a slap in the face, but still being confused--and having heard what Cam had to say--he won't be sure enough to really act on this yet. (We, the audience, will be convinced, because it will corroborate Avalon's predictions and, subsequently, the "coma dream.") I think the "device" that's been alluded to will be Booth struggling to reconcile what he thinks he feels with what he knows about his relationship with Brennan, and we'll see this play out in the coming episodes as Booth, to use David Boreanaz's turn of phrase, "courting" Brennan.

A lot of people I know have their hopes up really, really high. The premiere has been getting good reviews, but I think it's important for everyone to try not to anticipate having a huge, massive squeefest. The difference between what critics think and what fangirls think can often be huge. I think it seems likely that the premiere is going to set up a strong season, with potential for a further build for Booth and Brennan, but I don't think viewers are in for a Booth and Brennan fluff party. I don't think they'll make out at a crime scene. I don't think they'll necessarily take the qualifiers off of their ILYs. So if that's what you're waiting for, you might want to exhale. I'm not saying it doesn't have the potential to be entertaining (Cyndi Lauper's accent could probably carry the entire episode by itself), but I'm concerned about a mass disappointment at about 11:30 tonight.

Oh, hell, what am I saying? You all liked the damn finale.

Fall Kickstart 2009: Gossip Girl

2009-09-14T15:00:00.002-04:00

Gossip Girl is back for a third season tonight, and we're filled with anxious excitement. On the one hand, new storylines bring fresh promise to the show, which had a lagging season two. And on the other hand, we can't remember the last time a high-school based show successfully sent its main characters off to college. As just about everyone in the cast heads to NYU, we're cautiously optimistic about the fate of our beloved (and behated!) characters.

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Excels At: Delicious drama. I've long argued that Gossip Girl is what The Hills would be if it didn't even try to be "reality." Between hookups, breakups, frenemies, and long-lost half-siblings shared with your ex-boyfriend, this show succeeds week to week at bringing the crazy. It's well-done, too. Even when the show reaches deep into the cliche jar (no, really, Serena and Dan share a half-sibling, who's now in New York looking for his parents), it puts a fresh spin and a Blair Waldorf smackdown on an old trick.

Needs Improvement: The end of the second season was hard to watch. Dan hooked up with a teacher, a move that could have been interesting if it wasn't so heavy-handed and creepy. Or if it had been Chuck. Chuck could've gotten away with teacher-doing. Nate probably could have, too, but he had his cougar-hookup arc earlier in the season.

Part of the problem was that the stories have begun to over-feature recurring characters. After the hugely awesome Georgina arc in season one, the writers began to introduce more and more characters to come in and stir up drama. In season two, Nate's grandparents came to make crazy, as did sketchball Aaron Rose, Poppy Lifton, Lord Marcus Beaton (and his aforementioned cougar stepmom, Lady Catherine), sucky friend Agnes, would-be rapist Jack Bass, noted sleazy Spanish teacher Rachel Carr, and bizarro-plotline driver Elle the "Nanny." And that list doesn't even count Scott, Lily and Rufus's biological son, who made his first appearance in the season finale.

Too much! Can we get back to the show where the biggest drama comes straight from our main characters?

Also, can someone please tell me what purpose Vanessa and Nate serve? They are so freaking useless.

Interpersonal Dynamics: Most notably, Chuck/Blair seems to finally be officially on. It's exciting, mostly because it seems like they're still going to be up to no good, only now, they're kind of like this little mischief-making team. Which I guess they always have been. Look for their wily ways to get the best of them as the season progresses, as they struggle to keep from manipulating each other. (I think it can't be done.)

Dan and Serena is on the sidelines for a while, it looks like. Which is sad, but what can you do when you find out you share a half-sibling? We all know they'll figure it out in the end; for now, it'll be interesting to watch them grow as individuals for a little while.

And of course, there's Lily and Rufus, who are also finally official after two seasons of grown-up tension. We figure they're probably not over all of their problems, either, but it's more interesting to watch them try and figure it out together rather than continue the will-they-or-won't-they. The OMGSOMUCHSEXUALTENSION is really best left for the barely-legals. Also, just some early speculation? I wouldn't be surprised to see Lily get pregnant this year. Just throwing that out there.

Particularly Notable: Hilary Duff is joining the cast for an arc, where she plays an

Pay Attention To: Dorota. I'm still convinced she's Gossip Girl.

Overall Score: 3.5 Stars.

Season Two premieres in the U.S. tonight at 9:00 on the CW.

Supernatural is BACK BABY! It’s Apocalypse Now, and You’re All Invited!

2009-09-11T18:02:00.015-04:00

Floods. Hurricanes. Swine flu. North Korea. And... fangirls?! THE END IS TRULY NIGH.

"Look Mr. Edlund. Yes I'm a fan, but I really don't appreciate being mocked." Well, I hate to tell you this Becky, but...
The season five premiere of Supernatural, 'Sympathy for the Devil', aired last night on the CW, and I might sound like a broken record at this point but why are you not yet watching this show?! The episode did not disappoint in ANY aspect: it had humor (oh, the postmodernism of it all!), drama, wtf moments, angst and everything else that makes Supernatural the best show no one's watching - and those who do watch it, well, they're crazy, as this episode establishes. SamLicker89, I'm looking at YOU.

NOTE: This post contains spoilers for SPN 5x01 'Sympathy for the Devil'. However, it also contains several MORE excellent reasons why you should give the show a try, aside from the ones I've already mentioned, so do keep reading and let yourself be convinced!

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"What in the devil is your name?" "Little old Sammity-Sam!"
When season four ended, Sam and Dean were standing at the Boca del Inferno itself (oh wait no, that was Buffy), after Sammy accidentally set Lucifer free. Oops. Yeah, Dean's not going to be so quick to forgive and forget this one, and he spends most of the episode preparing us for the big angsty ending by telling Sam that his apologies aren't good enough. Very inappropriately this kept reminding me of a scene in Greek where Casey found out that Frannie is dating Evan. This upset her because Casey used to date Evan, but Evan cheated on her with Rebecca, who is now dating Cappie, who used to date Casey, who is Frannie's sorority sister, and Frannie told Casey to stay with Evan anyway, after which Casey slept with Cappie, but then Casey and Evan broke up and now Casey doesn't want to be friends with Frannie anymore, and then she... says her apologies aren't enough..... um, huh? What? This is SRS TELEVISION people, honest!

Basically it's all very angsty though. And see, as is the case of all good television friend-/ships, angst only serves to strengthen their relationship in the end. I KNOW this. But seeing Dean stand there and tell Sam that nothing could be like it was, that was a tough moment. I think honestly I only really like angst when I'm seeing it in retrospective so I know everything will be alright. And who knows what will happen to the Winchester brothers at the end of this season (which is in all likelihood going to be the last)? Even though my ideal ending for the show is the two brothers riding off into the sunset in the Impala, rock music blaring as they bicker, I just don't see it happening at this point. Sad smiley face.

Kodak moment!! Sort of. This is a random picture but it's one of the precious few smiles shared between any characters in this episode. Besides the crazy fangirl smiles of course.
As far as characters in this episode go, I must say Dean might have been a tad too emo, even for me. Of course the tense relationship between the brothers dampened any interaction they had with each other and other people, but he was just moping, and his voice was way deep, and was it just me or did his eyes seem smaller than usual? Don't get me wrong, if ever there was a time to be mopey this would be it, but even though we all love Harry Potter (right? RIGHT?!), we can all admit that he was a bit of a pain in Order of the Phoenix. This season definitely looks like it'll be darker than the rest, but then, we knew this. And in Supernatural, darker usually equals more absurd and black humor, so count me in. Ah the humor. I'll get to that in a moment. As for Sam in this episode, he was really a pleasant surprise. See, I've always been a Dean girl, it's never really been a question, but actually I was surprised by how much I understood and emphasized with Sam here. He's made some bad choices in the past year, but he's honestly had the best of intentions at any given time. He reminds me a lot of Jack Shephard when I really stop to examine it, and with all the crap he got this episode from fake!Bobby and Dean and the angels (indirectly), I think I'm actually on his side so far, loyalty-wise. I hope I won't have to take that any further though, because I prefer to just be on the Winchester side and leave it at that.

"You know your surrogate daddy's still awake. Screaming in there." Oh good... Meg is back. /sarcasm
Thank god Bobby was possessed. I mean, there's no way he couldn't have been but still!! He truly is their surrogate daddy, and unlike Dean, Bobby actually showed some compassion for Sam in this episode: "I ain't cutting you out boy. Not ever." I LOVE Bobby! He's my favorite non-main character and personally I think that he's a much healthier father figure than John ever was, and seeing him struggle against the demon possession because of his love for the boys (again, we've only ever seen John be able to do this, because of his love for Sam and Dean), and impale himself with the knife... Bobby is the anchor of Supernatural, I keep saying this, amongst all the deceit and bad blood Bobby has always been the one person who would never ever betray Sam and Dean (and implicitly us, the viewers). Him losing the use of his legs is horrible and I hate to see what it'll do to him, but I hope it'll only give him even more chances to be awesome. Kicking ass and taking names, wheelchair-bound – if anyone can do it, it's Bobby!

Before I continue though, I have to call out the writers. I'm sure other reviews will mention this too, but I just couldn't let it go. I mean I'll forgive the writers of Supernatural for just about anything because they're so over-the-top awesome, but how on earth do they justify Bobby ever getting possessed?! He was the one who gave Sam and Dean the charms to prevent possession, and if the boys were smart enough to get the tattoos surely a seasoned hunter like Bobby would have done it years ago! The only possibility would be if other demons grabbed him somewhere, ripped off his charm and held him down while he was being possessed...? I don't know. I'd like this cleared up. It seemed a bit rushed, but I suppose they had a lot to get through in this episode.

The Devil Wears Island. In a theater near you. SOON. *Muahaha*.
Oh, actually there is one more character who deserves a section of their own: Lucifer! Or rather, his pre-possessed (haha see what I did there?) vessel. It is, of course, our very own Jacob from Lost, and man... that's the best typecasting I have EVER seen. From THE Jacob to one of the most ambiguous figures ever, the fallen angel. I mean man, talk about irony. The episode was called 'Sympathy for the Devil', but honestly I don’t think we got to see a lot of that yet... I'm very intrigued by the way Lucifer will be portrayed on the show, because I don't doubt he will be interesting. We already know that Mark Pellegrino can bring the necessary depth to a character like this.

Now we're on the subject, did this remind anyone else of the scene with Ben and Jack in the church in '316'? Hmmm.
Speaking of vessels, Dean was informed that he is meant to serve as the vessel for Michael, the arch angel who is supposed to kill Lucifer. Eh. I'm sure fellow blogger Scarlett will agree with me that this wouldn't be... the best thing ever... exactly? I have a feeling that in the end, Dean will have to submit his body to Michael, and this will end up killing him/destroying his soul. And that would be a terrible thing to watch. Poor, tortured Dean's last minutes/scenes would not even be DEAN, it would be someone who possessed him, and the fight would indeed end up being bigger than the boys, but carry less emotional weight because of that fact. There is an alternative though: when Dean was talking about forgetting the angels and the demons and fighting to save the planet themselves, it might only have been empty words – but could they actually hold some promise of what's to come? They've got Cas (yay, btw!!) on their side it seems... so here's hoping!

Um... way to play into Becky's fanfictional assumptions there, Dean. OH COME ON everybody's thinking it!
Okay I think that's all the mythology stuff out of the way! Now I want to talk about the writers of the show, who are clearly on crack. Or something. EL-OH-effing-EL people!! Please do me a favor and watch the clip below. Even if you never want to watch another minute of this show you WILL want to see this. Basically someone's written a book series about the boys, and this girl is a fan. Like, a FAN...

*calms self* I have so much to say about this. First of all, the fact that the show exists within the show in the form of a cult book series with a group of "small, but dedicated followers" was first introduced in the season 4 episode 'The Monster At the End of This Book', and it builds on what I'm sure is a great inside joke within the writers' room responding to the fact that such an overwhelming portion of the real SPN fandom consists of screaming fangirls and Wincest shippers. In season 4, they took this joke as far as to make a few sarcastic comments ("Don't they know we're brothers?!" "That doesn't seem to matter."), but now apparently they've thrown out all pretenses and actually introduced a fangirl into the story! The writers have NO shame, and I love them to bits for it! What other franchise dares to take such royal piss out of their own fandom – and gets away with it?! I'm sure the "SamLicker89"s of the world realize that Wincest is bizarre, and honestly I think it's pretty neat that rather than condemning these fans' existence, the writers are actually incorporating it all into the story! Just like they're incorporating swine flu, and the hurricanes, and the other disasters. I like to believe that we're meant to associate crazy fangirls writing slash and coming out of the woodwork with the apocalypse. Oh my god you guys, SERIOUSLY, not just any show could get away with stuff like this! A character not only commenting on the show itself ("The demon stuff was getting kinda old") but writing honest to god pornographic incestual fanfiction about the main characters, on prime time network television! And this in the same episode as some of the most gripping, emotional material the show has yet produced. "Sam touched, no caressed, Dean's clavicle. 'This is wrong,' said Dean. 'Then I don't want to be right,' replied Sam, in a husky voice!"

This show is bat-shite crazy. I love it.

To finish off here, I could not have been more pleased with this premiere. I breezed through the show over the summer and after that I've rewatched a lot of it, and I only loved it more the second time around. The premieres have never stood out to me though, including the Pilot, so I wasn't expecting too much with this one. Also, I've never before experienced waiting for a single episode of the show before so I didn't know how much I would enjoy it as a weekly event rather than as a marathon show, but it's shaping up to be pretty epic! This episode had it all, including of course heaps of angst – which better be leading up to the hug of all hugs, and the SamLicker89s of the world better not have scared them off such showings of affection! I hope this is truly a sign that season five is going to be the BIGGEST, the BEST and the most BADASS (I couldn’t think of another b-word and I was on a roll. A BREAD-roll, omfg I’m so funny. They should really hire me on the show. For the lulz) season ever.

Score: 9/10. = IT WINS.

((Also this is the first post I've done where I succeeded in posting it correctly on the first try!! Yay me!))

Glee: Okay, Can We Stop Talking About High School Musical Now?

2009-09-10T12:54:00.004-04:00

I think this should settle the “Is Glee Ripping Off High School Musical?” debate.

Riddle me this—is High School Musical allowed to make jokes about crazy-train filicide? Is High School Musical allowed to not-so-subtly make reference to oral sex—or worse yet, push “the C word”? And did you see the brochures in Emma’s office?

Definitely not HSM material.

Last night’s episode of Glee was every bit as entertaining as the premiere we saw four months ago—and it answered what I think is an even more important question:

What’s Glee going to be about?

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After the pilot, the direction of the show seemed nebulous. Obviously, the A-plot (getting to sectionals/regionals) was set, but the B-plots seemed harder to come by. Now, we can see those supporting stories developing, and they’re delicious.

The hilarity of Terri’s hysterical pregnancy is her character’s saving grace. If the show was trying to sell her as a sympathetic character, she’d be hard to take. Fangirls like me would see her only as a roadblock to the Will/Emma relationship; with this development, we’re totally allowed to love-to-hate her. It’s a bold choice for the show, and one that’s making for an interesting ship. For instance, in Matthew Morrison’s recent TVGuide.com interview, he said, “It's hard trying to defend [Will and Terri’s] relationship.”

Normally, you find actors trying to play devil’s advocate. There were times back in the day when Jenna Fischer of The Office would talk about how she thought maybe it was more interesting if Jim and Pam never figured things out, because her show is realistic and sometimes those things just don’t happen. Just this morning, Joshua Jackson and Anna Torv from Fringe were quoted by Entertainment Weekly as going against their oh-so-obvious ship. It’s refreshing to have a show not even try to sit on the fence about where they’re going.

Watching Terri flounder as she tries to conceal the very fake nature of her pregnancy is going to be amazing. I guess joint baths are out the window, eh? She’s obviously going to have to remove sex from the equation, and is that really the way you want to go when you’re trying to convince your husband not to leave you? Also, Terri doesn’t even know Emma exists at this point, right? There’s gotta be some intrigue down the road once she realizes her husband might have his eyes on his coworker. (Oh, yeah, we know a thing or two about that around here.)

The angsty goodness between Finn and Rachel is just as yummy. The show is doing an excellent job showcasing just how awkward young like can be, and how confusing the associated emotions are. Last night solidly built an impressive love triangle between the high-schoolers. It’s obvious already that Finn and Rachel like each other, but the status problems associated with that coupling, along with his girlfriend, are clearly going to put this relationship on hold for awhile. I can’t remember the last time premature ejaculation was used as a sweet device to show just how smitten our hero is. Finn’s subsequent lack of explanation did nothing to demonstrate this fact to poor Rachel, who pwned that last number.

It’s interesting to see how the Terri-like wheel of this love triangle, Quinn, is constructed differently. She’s still got her shrew-like characteristics, but I also kind of like seeing her take on the role of Vindictive Bitch Christian Cheerleader. While we’re on the subject, how un-High School Musical was that Celibacy Club meeting? I love how forthright Rachel was, discussing the pitfalls of preaching abstinence. It would be easy to have written Rachel as a prude, but it’s way more interesting to make her sexually aware.

So then let’s talk about the music. Last night we saw “Superfreak,” “Gold Digger,” “Push It,” “I Say a Little Prayer for You,” “Take a Bow,” and a delightful little snippet of “All By Myself.”

All I have to say is … good GOD, how hard are these people working?

The one problem I have is that I’m a little troubled by the staging used in “Take a Bow.” If this was my freshman undergrad course on “University Writing Through Hollywood Musicals,” we would say that episode had a diegetic conflict. All of the songs in the pilot and all of the songs except for “Take a Bow” are used in a diegetic context: the singing is actually happening. No one is breaking out into song randomly. But then in “Take a Bow,” and similarly, in a clip from an upcoming episode using the song “Bust Ya Windows,” the songs are used in an extradiegetic context: we’re not to assume that Rachel was actually belting out the chorus while watching Finn and Quinn (eww to that rhyme, by the way) canoodle at the lockers. It bothers me because it’s inconsistent. I have no problem with using music to highlight a moment, as “Take a Bow” expertly did last night, but it was confusing in a "is this really happening?" way.

It would be better if the show would keep the songs onstage or in rehearsal, but intersperse them with other scene snippets to spotlight how the song is relevant to other stories. This was done to great effect by showing Terri making redecorating plans during “Gold Digger,” and “Take a Bow” would have been just as moving were Rachel NOT singing in the hallway, but rather just standing there looking forlorn as the sound of her emotive rehearsal plays in the background.

Okay, fine, I’m just a musical snob.

All in all, another great showing from Glee and an excellent start to the 2009-2010 television season. Now bring on Week Two!

Supernatural: Our Hopes and Fears for Season 5

2009-09-07T16:02:00.012-04:00

Hello fellow Supernatural fans! *crickets chirp* Just us then? Well at least there's two of us! The 5th and Final season is looming very close and so we (Scarlett and Selina) decided to join forces to bring you the ultimate HOPES AND FEARS roundup post! Because there is so much to say, we've divided our points into five categories, and we'll address them individually below.

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1. SAM/DEAN

The end of season 4 saw Sam and Dean as far apart as they've ever been emotionally, yet when the world was ending they still held on to each other, and this gives us hope for their reconciliation. However, making up isn't fun without some angst first, so hopefully this reconciliation doesn't come too soon! Too often, TV depicts people having an argument and making up straight away. We need to see the tension, not just for the beautiful man tears of Jensen and Jared, but for the progression of the characters and the brothers' relationship. Sam and Dean *literally* went to hell and back and their relationship has never been under such strain. We have seen the lengths each has gone to protect the other and this desperate need to save each other is what effectively caused the apolcalypse - Sam wanting to protect Dean from getting himself killed fighting Lilith, and Dean wanting to protect Sam from his foretold dark future. Ultimately however, we want the brothers to continue being a team because the show is always at its best when Sam and Dean are working together and bantering as they go. They are THE WINCHESTER BROTHERS and even though things are going to be mighty tense and awkward in the Metallicar, their loyalty and love for one another would never waiver while fighting the evil forces, especially against the most evil evillest evil the world has ever seen. There are many issues they have to resolve and we want them BOTH to work towards bridging the gap between them. Sure, Dean will probably go off with Castiel and Sam needs his moping time with his emo bangs, but this show is ultimately about Sam and Dean vs. The World. Kripke has talked about revisiting S1 themes so we sincerely hope this is one of the things he was talking about. Yes, the stakes have been raised and Sam and Dean are pawns in a game far bigger than them but Supernatural is not about angels and demons, Supernatural is about family, friendship and belonging, and we need our mushy moments! More epic hugs please!

2. APOCALYPSE

Plea to the CW - Please please please give SPN a decent budget. Why? We hear you ask, things seem to be pretty good. Ok, we'll tell you why. Are you sitting comfortably? We're going to tell you a story of what a poor budget can do to a show. We call the show, let's say, Smallville. Now producers had been bigging up the 'Greatest Fight' between Superman and his oldest and most deadly adversary Doomsday - "It's going to be AMAZING", "The best thing you've ever seen", "You won't be able to sleep because of the nightmares about this horrifying monster". What happened was, Doomsday turned out to be a relatively tall man in a rubber suit fighting for about 30 seconds with Superman. That's it. Seriously. So please, CW, heed us when we say we will not be impressed if all we get in the season premier is Sam and Dean in a burning field, wiping their sweaty brows saying "Phew, what a fight." We do not want the apocalyspe to happen in offscreeenville, we want to see it unfold before our very eyes. We want Sam and Dean and their band of merry men to FIGHT the good fight. We want to see the action - preferably with Sam and Dean in torn shirts.... Yes we know we're demanding but here's one other thing we want: no more vessels! We do not want to see Sam-as-Lucifer, Dean-as-Michael (to clarify, Michael is the archangel who defeated Lucifer, and possibly what Zacariah is hinting at when talking to Dean about his destiny of defeating Lucifer). We want to see Sam and Dean as themselves fighting Lucifer and the Angels. It's clearly been established through Castiel/Jimmy Novak that humans do not keep their personality when possessed. If Lucifer is a fully-formed evil spirit/demon/angel/thing, we want to see Sam and Dean take him on in an epic battle scene, punches, fire, powers, hordes of angels, hordes of demons - basically a Lord of the Rings style war.

3. OTHER CHARACTERS

Even though the show is mainly about Sam and Dean, there are a lot of side characters rumoured to be coming back this season! Castiel, of course, will be a regular, and we anticipate lots of awkward incomprehensive-angel-amongst-humans situations... imagine Castiel trying to pick up a girl! What we DON'T want to happen though is to see him divide the brothers' time too much. Obviously he's mostly concerned with Dean and doesn't seem to have much time for Sam, and what with the brothers' current lukewarm feelings for each other, Castiel might hinder their reconciliation. We like the guy, but not even John could tear these guys apart... let's keep it that way! As for the others, well Bobby has obviously been a key player since season 2, acting as a substitute father for the boys, and here's hoping that this will be his role in season 5! Jim Beaver teased some big changes for Bobby... uh oh. It's always been such a relief amongst the possessions and backstabbing that Sam and Dean could always trust Bobby to have their best interests at heart - it would feel wrong to lose that. Oh and one last thing? Ruby needs to be GONE from our TV screens FOR GOOD. kthanx.

4. COMEDY

Ghostfacers: They've appeared in every season since they were introduced in season 2, and these characters (especially Ed and Harry) deserve one last hurrah, especially if this is to be the final season. The Ghostfacers have become an integral part of the cult fandom, with their website and their involvements in the last two Comic-Cons, and seeing as the last time they appeared they were unwittingly instructing Sam and Dean in how to do their job (4x17 'It's a Terrible Life'), perhaps this time when they show up they'll actually end up helping Sam and Dean again rather than hindering... of course with the hilarious commentary self-referential banter they always bring to the screen!

General: When Supernatural was named #37 on TV Ate My Brain's list of the top 100 Sci-Fi shows (OH YEAH!), the show was described as "often terrifying, often hilarious", and we couldn't agree more! It's the show's perfect balance of horror, angst and comedy that makes it stand out to us, and with the impending End of the World we worry that this means an upping of the angst and a downtoning of the fun. But knowing Kripke and his writing team, most likely MORE DEATH just equals MORE INAPPROPRIATE JOKES, so we're excited! Upping the scales of action is sure to bring us some hilarious moments! Also, more self-aware episodes please, ala 'Hollywood Babylon' and 'Ghostfacers': episodes where we're being made aware that we're watching a TV show and where the premise of the whole show is ridiculed, yet at the end we're still as invested in the story and the characters as we ever were... because that's what makes the show brilliant!

5. SHIPPING

Shipping and Supernatural is an odd combination, however we suppose we HAVE to tolerate that there is some romance... *sigh*. In this blog we'd like to address two more or less canon pairings and our hopes for them this season!

Anna/Dean:
While Sam was being indecent with the devil, Dean very symbolically found solace in an angel. Anna was supposedly destroyed towards the end of the season, but surely she's too kickass to really be gone! It's hard to ship Dean with anyone, but Anna seems to be one of the few exceptions - their relationship would definitely be interesting, seeing as she's an angel and all (but still feels human emotions as far as we know), and it's better than the string of no-name small-town single mothers he tends to go for. At least Anna is a character in her own right and can fend for herself, which makes shipping the two so much more interesting! Bring back Anna!

Dean/Castiel:
Ahh. See, we don't ship Wincest, so kudos to us, but Dean/Castiel is fair game as far as we're concerned! Their long looks... their smoldering sexual chemistry... the fact that Dean's siren was a dude... the evidence is overwhelming! "I'm the one that gripped you tight and raised you from perdition" "Yeah, thanks for that." See, see *looks around to see nodding* ....Okay, right, yeah, maybe not so much in canon. But girls can dream right?? (And we do *ahem*) We know that Dean and Castiel will have more scenes this year, and while these are almost certain to be of the heterosexual variety, but there's nothing wrong with Dean/Castiel, and it would add a whole new dimension to the show. 4 srs.

So that's it, our hopes and fears for season 5! It premieres next Wednesday, we could not be more excited! Hopefully a few of you readers have taken more interest in the show at this point, so we'll have some readers for our posts on the show during the season. Look for our post on the ideal ending for the show soon! Thanks for reading!

(Caps courtesy of screencap-paradise.com)

The Sour Taste Of UST

2009-09-04T03:47:00.010-04:00

I know what you’re thinking. Sour taste in the same sentence as UST, a Bones picture... what?! Because really, UST is the most powerful ‘shipping force on TV and when written and acted well, it can be absolute perfection and help hold a show up for years. Trust me, I get it; I believe the hype and my stomach gets all fluttery and I can write an entire post about that time when my ‘ship shared that meaningful glance. Hell, I ‘ship from cast photos before a pilot has even aired (thank you, Stargate Atlantis).

However, for a moment, step with me into madness and try subscribing for a brief moment to what I call the RST Scenario. Yes, Resolved Sexual Tension is a real thing, and I know almost every writer and actor (and fan) will tell you that putting the ‘ship together means death. But honestly. HONESTLY. That has to be my single, biggest grievance with TV ‘ship today.

First, let’s discuss how a UST can die all on its own.

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I’m still surprised every time I hear a Bones fan say they don’t want Booth/Bones together yet. I’m sorry, but how much more unbelievable do you really want their relationship to get? We’ve taken most of the journey with them and completely experienced partnership, then friendship, then trust, and now we’re pretty much watching them go through the entire love factor. ALL WHILE SOMEHOW STILL NOT GETTING IT ON. I mean really, everyone knows they love each other, they know they love each other; can anyone name a couple in real life that has actually gotten this far in a relationship without having committed to an actual relationship? And yet, it’s Bones and Booth, man. I’ll stay for the ride because the UST right now is just that good.

But here’s where we start to see the dead end: they’re working through everything now! Fears, hopes, dreams, trust issues, family drama, babies, vices... what’s left when they finally become a couple but happily ever after?

Second, how RST can kill a show.

There is the inevitable Moonlighting scenario. I never watched more than a few episodes of this show and yet somehow it always comes into play with articles about will-they/won’t-they TV relationships. I would just like to know why this show is still being talked about. It went off the air in 1989! Was it the first show to have sexual tension? Can we not find a more recent comparison?

Okay, maybe we can say Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman was one such RST casualty. I’m sure there are more recent examples of shows that fell to their demise once the ‘ship became a couple, but I’m hard pressed to find one. And no, Gilmore Girls does not count.

Third, how RST is done wrong.

1. Do not over extend your UST welcome.
Law and Order: SVU taught us you can only dangle the treat in front of everyone for so long. Some of us still watch, but we whine, and it’s doubtful we’ll think it’s worth it when it happens.

2. Do not exhaust the minute relationship workings or personality quirks before the ‘ship becomes a couple.
Oh X-Files.

3. Do not skip the good stuff.
The Office, I’m looking at you. We went from OMG OMG UST to happy couple? I let it slide because it still kind of works, but cheaters! Also, Stargate SG-1, nice try.

Fourth, how RST can be done right.

1. Do explore sex before a relationship.
Farscape. Bloody genius show. Sex in season one, and still they managed a will-they/wont-they relationship? This wins at life.

2. Do start a relationship too soon.
Standoff was running from the start and chock-full of sexual tension even while they were sleeping together. At first it was just sex, and it was hot, and then it was more than just sex, and still hot. And I know it was cancelled, but I promise it wasn’t because of the ‘ship. Go watch.

3. Do evolve the relationship naturally.
Jericho paired Stanley and Mimi perfectly. The wedding plans may have started a little early, but in a war-torn, post-apocalyptic setting, and with a ticking cancellation clock, who could blame them?

4. Do keep something in your back pocket.
If timing had been on our side, ER could possibly be the crown jewel of the RST Scenario. Carter and Abby, you guys. Excuse me for a nostalgic moment. It’s what we didn’t see them work through before they became a couple that will tantalize forever. Luka/Abby is nothing compared to what Carter/Abby would have been. We didn’t see how Carter’s parents would react to an engagement (we love you, Gamma!). We didn’t see Abby go through the bipolar disorder freak out when she got pregnant. We didn’t see the ups and downs of the ever-recovering addicts. We didn’t see how their trust and timing issues would ever resolve so that this relationship would actually last. And while it may not have had the same UST thrill as the first time they saw each other as more than just co-workers, or the first time they touched or kissed, the RST was built on a swiss cheese foundation – full of enough holes to keep us hoping they’d fill in the gaps before it all fell down.

So seriously, stop with the excuses!

How great would it be to watch Booth/Brennan try to hide a relationship? Brennan into it for sex, and Booth something so much more? Brennan pregnant? Booth’s family interacting with Brennan as his girlfriend? There are still things we haven’t seen, but those are getting fewer and the predictability of these scenarios is greater.

Don’t start writing a show planning to avoid RST and drag the UST to the bitter ends of absurdity (Hart Hanson). Man up, think creatively, plan the relationship arc with the storyline, and show us something amazing!

House: To Ship or Not to Ship

2009-09-04T00:31:00.012-04:00

I was brought on board sometime last year toward the middle/end of the season to write on my thoughts in relation to House/Cuddy and managed to pump out two blogs before the end of the year and that finale. I italicized “that” because at the time, I had a little bit of contempt for David Shore and Company that night in May. But now that some time has elapsed and a little under a month is left until the Season 6 premier, I believe it was high time to write something.

I started out this piece with the full intention of addressing spoilers and making a few predictions on the season. Due to some highly controversial stuff floating around in the fandom with regards to the premier, I decided to deviate from my original thought and pose a question to all of you.

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It's inevitable really. You turned on your television set, plopped down on your couch, and decided to become invested with a show. You're a fangirl. (Or boy.)

I admit, I can be a fairly rabid one at times and the last few days, I have come to question my sanity. Do others experience the same heated emotions I do? Do some feel the overwhelming need to punch out their screens from anger or buy a lifetime supply of mood stabilizers?

I suppose all of this stems from the crazy atmosphere surrounding my favorite show, House. (Although Bones runs a close second.) I am a House/Cuddy shipper, which is probably painfully obvious to all of the four people who read what I wrote down last season. It's a roller-coaster relationship. What makes the two of them sexy together is the fact that they were miserable and weren't afraid to admit it or hide it from one another. It was flawed which made it an almost train wreck, yet oddly compelling and lovely. To know someone for the span of twenty years, to have a draw to them, yet never act on it for fear of getting hurt. The finale sort of put a wrench in the two of them starting anything up.

But if these two get together, the rest of the fans are up in arms. Well, what about the House/Wilson shipper? They make valid arguments on their side. Wilson is an excellent friend and has even forgiven House for being involved in the death of his girlfriend. They've known each other years and House relies on Wilson when he is in trouble. Wilson even serves as his relaxant, someone he can just kick back with and enjoy the company of.

On another side, there's Cameron. She was a loyal student of his, taking his way of solving cases into her own repertoire as head of the ER. House seems pretty resistant to change but Cameron's heart was in the right place when she did want to save him because he was broken. If we care about someone, don't we naturally hate to see them suffer? But alas, now she is married to Chase.

Many of us take up our paddles and get on our ships, manning cannons to aim at the other boats in the House Sea. At times though, I hate to think that we are all aiming at one another, destined to blow ourselves up from the inside. All in all, I suppose I am wondering if all of this just is what shipping is about. It's the tears, the laughter, the heartache, the fury. It's hugging your virtual and actual friends when the going is great and passing them a pillow to punch when all seems for naught. I am sure there are many more factions this pertains to out there (who don't “yell” as loudly, so I am not as aware).

It seems that whichever direction House turns, a “love interest” could be in his view if he would allow himself the indulgence. But...does it help to root? Is House "incurably himself" like the new promo suggests, destined to be alone?

Which leaves me to my ultimate question, the one I am posing to all of you. Does “shipping” affect the way you view a show or does it simply exist in your psyches as an added bonus interest? Are we just a bunch of collective “idiots” for having faith in our ships?

Alright, alright. That turned in to more than one ultimate question. But I am just as curious to see what all of you think and have to say. Sound off below!

The Deal Breaker: Why Enough is Enough

2009-09-03T15:00:00.009-04:00

Ok, to truly understand this post you must understand something. I am completely INSANE. To explain more fully the reason for my insanity - I am a completionist. I HAVE to see things through. And this trait has become the bane of my TV world. I just can not stop watching awful shows. Shows with bad writing, complete jump the shark moments, character assassinations. But I just. Can. Not. Stop. Watching. Please help me! Rehab 101 here I come.

Hi. My name is Scarlett and I am a TV completionist.
Ok, I have acknowledged my problem.
Next step, confronting this problem.
So I have decided to make a list of cut-off points. Moments so OOC, badly written, and WTF that in order to stay healthy I must leave the show. Here goes...

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Grey’s Anatomy: When Alex Karev leaves.
Dead Denny Sex. You know what I thought that was it, I did, truly. I was so disgusted, horrified and offended. I honestly felt like writing a letter to Shonda telling her to DIAF. I held off for about two weeks, but then had to watch. Why? I hear you ask. Good question. Because in my heart of hearts, I just have to see Alex Karev get his happy ending. I just could not leave him alone in Seattle Grace Hospital with a crazy girlfriend. Watching his heart break when the truth came out was one of the saddest moments, if not the saddest moment ever on Grey’s *sob*. I can not give up on this show until I know Alex has his fairy-tale ending.

Gossip Girl: When Chuck Bass and Jenny Humphrey become an OTP
Let’s be honest, I originally started watching this show to watch beautiful people swan around New York and imagine myself as them. But, one word changed all that for me – Chair. What? What on earth does a piece of furniture have to do with why you watch? Ah, but you see Chair is the portmanteau of a fascinating, wonderful, tortuous couple made up of one Chuck Bass and one Blair Waldorf. These two characters are possibly the most intricate personalities of any teen TV drama. Their sizzling chemistry and sadomasochistic mating dance has set my shipper heart alight and my viewing eyes fixed. I don’t care what they do, as long as it is Blair and Chuck, Chuck and Blair. They could go to Africa to volunteer with baby elephants, they could become poor, they could have just one second per episode of screentime, I don’t care. But one thing I will not take is for either one of them to be endgame with someone other than themselves. I even don’t mind them not being together and ending up alone. I choose Chuck/Jenny for my most hated endgame couple. They can hook-up, though I don’t really want to see it happen, but I will stop watching if they become an OTP.

Smallville: When Chloe dies.
Please, please, please kill her off, TPTB. Put me out of my misery. This show has gone rapidly downhill from the end of season 5, yet I am stuck watching it because I am way too emotionally invested in a fictional character called Chloe Sullivan. She is Clark’s rock and heart, yet TPTB are so afraid to recognise this we have had 8 seasons of the Clana (Clark and Lana) merry-go-round till I am sick and tired of spinning, much like the sick and tired storylines. The recent Smallville finale sucked so bad, I’m surprised the show didn’t get cancelled right away, and to be truly honest, I wish I could say I would not be turning in to the season 9 premier, I wish I could I swear, but until the fat lady sings and Chloe is declared dead beyond all doubt, God, I’m going to be there. This show has abused, humiliated and exploited me, yet I still cling to the vestiges of hope that things will change. Please, please, please, TPTB, let me and Chloe go!

Heroes: When we find out Claire is the mother of Sylar’s son.
Oh so many improbable storylines have been and gone and will come, but actually I’ve come to realise most of them I could probably live with. I mean we’ve had the Jessica/Nikki/Tracey fiasco; the deaths and fake-out deaths of nearly every character; the bizarre world of ancient Japan; weird incestual vibe between Claire and the entire Petrelli family; and the Claire/Peter/Sylar show; but when we find out that Claire is the mother of Sylar’s son Noah, POOF, that’s the sound of me flying like Nathan Petrelli and getting the fuck out.

Supernatural: Sam and Dean become involved in a love triangle.
I watch this show for the relationship between the Winchester brothers. I like the fact there is no ‘Chick Flick’ TV. It’s not that I’m averse to a ship per se, it’s that I don’t want to see the brothers fight over a girl to the detriment to their relationship. They’re just too perfect and special to have something so trivial come between them. I do not want to see Supernatural 90210.

So, there we go. You’ll know if I break these. Help me stay strong if hell breaks loose and these storylines ever happen.
It has made me feel rather pathetic acknowledging the depths of TV viewing I am willing to sink to just so I can complete a series so here is one example where I’ve managed to stick to what I said. Round of applause, please. *Blushes, blushes. Accepts statuette.*

Buffy The Vampire Slayer: When Angel left.
I’m sticking to this one, I swear. No matter how much my friend bugs me to watch the whole thing, no matter how much I want to see how it ends, no matter how much I want to see the hotness that is James Marsters aka Spike and Sarah Michelle Gellar get it on. That is it. I’m sticking to it.

And then there are times when one just has to realise, no matter how well you do, once an addict always an addict, and just give in.

One Tree Hill: Never
Stop laughing in the back, yes you! I don’t have to explain how ridiculous the show has become and judging from the spoilers, how even more ridiculous it is going to get, but I’m going to anyway. Could I stop watching when they ret-conned the entire Brucas relationship? No. Could I stop watching when Haley had almost no screentime? No. When Nathan grew a beard? No. When a dog ate Dan’s heart (Yes, that’s right, I typed that correctly)? No. Could I stop watching when I knew Leyton would be endgame? No. Even when they were getting married with the compulsory OTP daughter, I knew Leyton were leaving so I’m still sticking around in the vain hope that the Chad will soon realise this is the only acting gig he’s going to get and come back and Brucas will be forever. One Tree Hill and I are stuck in a Chinese finger trap. One of us has to let go. It’s not going to be me.

So there you have it, my pathetic patheticness in all its pathetic glory. Go on, I’ve shared. Don’t be afraid. Share your abusive TV relationships with us and trust me, it’ll feel better.

Grey's: Because ER Was Such a Great Role Model...

2009-09-02T17:34:00.005-04:00

If you don't like spoilers, walk away right now. If you don't want your entire outlook on the future of Grey's Anatomy darkened and ultimately destroyed, run as fast you can - maybe ignorance really is bliss.

Still here? Okay, then.

Y'all, I have no idea what is wrong with Shonda Rhimes, or ABC Network for that matter. Is it pure greed? Of course it is. Because you can't possibly tell me there is any other reason for the ridiculous news we got today.

E!Online has just reported, buried within an article about Katherine Heigl's leave of absence to make a movie, that Seattle Grace will soon merge with rival hospital Mercy West - thus bringing on tons of new characters from said other hospital and mixing them in with the doctors we already know and love. As if we really need any more newbies, right?

But that's not even the main issue here. This is:

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The Seattle Grace-Mercy West merger storyline is part of a long-term plan hatched by producers and ABC execs to make Grey's Anatomy a viable going concern for years to come. (We hear they want something like an ER that could continue for 15 years or more.)

SOURCE

Are you kidding me? I almost don't even want to scream out "Seriously?!?" because Shonda doesn't deserve to have that remain such a popular part of the American vernacular anymore, but really -- SERIOUSLY!?!?

So, let me get this straight. They're going to introduce even more new characters, mix them in with the originals we already love (and the previous newbs we've grown to accept by now), then slowly start to weed out the originals over time until we're left with Grey's Anatomy v2.0?

Allow me to clue you in on a little secret, ABC: It didn't work for ER! Those last five seasons were one embarrassing train wreck after another. It's not going to work for Scrubs, either, although guest spots by Zach Braff will carry it for at least this first season of attempting life with a beta cast. The only reason that ER was able to sustain itself as a successful quality drama for the first nine years (even with the revolving door of characters) is that Dr. John Truman Carter - the character the entire premise of the show was built upon - had never left.

Sure, we've seen characters come and go many times already on Grey's, and the general viewing audience seems to have accepted Callie, Lexie, Mark, and Hunt with open arms by now. (I've accepted Arizona, too, but I'm not sure about the rest of you out there.) But that doesn't mean we think Grey's Anatomy can continue on their shoulders alone. You can't systematically remove Izzie, Meredith, Derek, Alex, Cristina, etc et al and think we'll still watch because, hey, Lexie and Mark are still there so technically it's still Grey's Anatomy - now we just have McSteamy full-time instead of McDreamy! Trust me, Mark and Lexie running the show with a group of newbies under their care is never going to work. Ever.

And really, to be honest, it still won't work even if Derek and Meredith did stay around for 15 years taking over the hospital and overseeing all the new interns that come through their doors. Why? Because no one really gives a rat's ass about the newbies. Especially not when you're trying so hard to force us to get to know them/like them that the remaining originals we do still love barely receive any worthwhile time on the screen anymore.

I mean, come on, did no one learn anything from House? Even House learned from House, and is making great strides at correcting what went horribly wrong with the introduction of the newbs. But sure, Shonda/ABC, give it a go - since you're so wonderful and infallible, clearly the mistakes and lessons of others won't possibly apply to you.

Who knows, maybe I'll end up surprising myself, but I have sneaking suspicion that I won't be watching Grey's Anatomy anymore after this season.

Horrible, epic fail, Shonda/ABC. Really. What the fuck.

Warehouse 13 (aka X-Files, Eureka, Fringe in a Blender)

2009-09-01T01:53:00.006-04:00

Myka: “I thought the medic might know something so I asked him to meet me after work.”
Pete: “Good idea. I got a thing to do. [serious] But, Myka, I want you to be careful. I want you to use a condom.”
Myka: “That's hilarious.”

Hee. There’s just something about this show. It’s not exactly an original storyline: two Secret Service agents (Pete and Myka) are whisked away to a warehouse in the middle of nowhere that guards supernatural objects from the ages, and they are tasked with going about the country to bring back artifacts still loose in the world and wrecking havoc. Okaaay.

So here I was, all set to be bored or irked by the show. A July start date, a copycat premise, and while I absolutely love the sci-fi, I still recoil at the newly renamed SyFy channel. Oh sure, that name change will totally draw in all the non-geeks! Uh huh.

The show doesn’t start off with a bang. It’s not particularly sophisticated or original. And at first, the chemistry between the leads was a bit iffy (I said, at first. See below for the status update). But what does shine through clearly from the start is the charm. The show knows it’s not X-Files or Fringe, and doesn’t attempt to be as clever as Eureka; it doesn’t care, and lives quite contentedly in being adorably charming and fun. The show promises and delivers both a good time and some pretty amusing banter.

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Pete: “No more zoos, okay? From now on, if an artifact is at a zoo, we leave it there.”
Myka: “Monkeys spit. Artie, do you know that? They… they spit! And it is not pleasant.”

So let’s talk about the ‘ship because really, 75% of why I continue to watch a television show is for this reason alone.

The cast starts to gel nicely over a few episodes and yes, inevitably the leads will end up in a will-they, won’t-they relationship. Unlike Castle, where the leads were (unsuccessfully) meant to ooze chemistry and "meant-to-be" from the first moment, Warehouse 13 takes more of the Bones approach.

Pete: “Use your feminine wiles. Smile. You're pretty when you smile.”
Myka: “I am?”
Pete: “Yeah.”
Myka: “So, what does that mean when I'm not smiling?”
Pete: [pause] “Kind of frightening.”

Myka and Pete are partners, however unwillingly that may have started, and they equal your polar opposite couple of oil and water. And yet; there are all the little things that make this ‘ship worth watching.

One: she knows what he means when he says “red shirt”. Hello, that’s a true sci-fi kink right there.

Myka: “Artie acts like keeping us alive isn't a priority. To him we're just...”
Pete: “Redshirts?”
Myka: “Yeah.”
Pete: “Okay. First, he doesn't think we're redshirts. And second, that's so cool you knew what I meant!”

Two: he knows she’s hot, but also thinks she’s out of his league. It makes Pete not care how he acts, and makes her find him endearing on occasion. So worth it.

Myka: “She’s out of your league.”
Pete: “How do you know what my league is?”
Myka: “Not that I asked for them, but I’ve had season tickets.”

Three: she names her ferret after him. Ha.

Leena: “Myka did name her ferret; she’s just not telling Pete the name.”
Claudia: “Well why not?”
Artie: “‘Cause she named it Pete.”
Myka: “It’s cute, but it’s so annoying.”

There are serious things, too, but the show doesn’t get bogged down in them. They’re just built into the foundation and bits revealed nicely in a way that brings the emotional resonance and backstory without forgetting the humor at the show’s core.

If it’s the best new show on television you’re after, or something with a lot of depth, conspiracy or mystery that will keep you digging and analyzing, this isn’t the right end of the spectrum. But there is appeal here, and definitely a nice attraction between the leads (and a general chemistry with the rest of the cast), and some deeper story growing that might just be the sugar for your sweet tooth.

Oh yeah, and did I mention the chemistry got hot?

Fake!Myka: “So what tipped you?”
Pete: “The real Myka... would never kiss me. Never! Not if her life depended on it! [pause] Which is...”
Fake!Myka: “...a shame. You’re a good kisser.”

Season One is currently airing in the U.S. on Tuesday nights. The show has been renewed for season two.

The Office: Double the Fun?

2009-08-28T19:58:00.000-04:00

I am so confused.

We've got so many conflicting and confusing set reports from The Office that some fans are beginning to wonder if we're being supremely messed with. While I highly doubt the show has the time, budget, or the need to film decoy scenes (especially ones that involve flying across the country), the reports and visual evidence I've seen are highly confusing.

So I thought we'd take a little time this afternoon to analyze what we've got here and try to make some sense out of it. Ready? Spoilers under the cut.

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Jim and Pam get married in the fourth episode of The Office.

Jim and Pam have a rehearsal dinner (so sayeth Jenna) and a church wedding, complete with Halpert family members, Beesly family members, and the entire Office staff.

Jim and Pam get married in Niagara Falls, so sayeth Randy Cordray, a producer: "All I can really say is that the wedding does happen in Niagara Falls, and Jim and Pam decide that they would really like to get closer to the waterfall, and so to do that, they take a ride on the Maid of the Mist."

Jim and Pam are in their wedding clothes on the boat ride (including Jim's chopped tie, indicating it's the same day as the church wedding), and some local news outlets have said that they get married on board.

We know that at some point in the episode, Jim and Pam arrive in Niagara Falls; he's shown carrying an overnight bag, while she's carrying her wedding dress:

We also know Jim and Pam. In "Cafe Disco," they agreed that although the idea of eloping was nice, they wanted a "wedding wedding."

We know that Pam wants her parents to be at her wedding. (Duh.)

We also know they're kind of overwhelmed at the idea of a wedding wedding. Jenna said at the TCAs that "It's going to be a destination wedding, probably in Niagara Falls. By making it a destination wedding, the hope is that nobody from the office will come."

We know that, at their wedding, they're still trying to hide the pregnancy.

Sidebar: This never turns out looking good.

Okay, so this is what I've put together from all of these things.

The church wedding takes place in Buffalo. Perhaps they will retcon something and say that Pam is from there. (We know from "Job Fair" that she went to high school in Scranton, but perhaps her family is originally from upstate New York. Obviously, we know that Jim grew up in Scranton, in the house that he and Pam now own.)

Maybe they choose that location because the minister knows Pam's family and they can invite the entire office and hope that they don't all decide to make the four-and-a-half-hour drive (thanks, Google maps!). And, of course, Jim and Pam are shocked when the whole office does make the trip. (I wouldn't be. Who wouldn't want to go to that wedding?)

So, basically, between Michael making a toast and Pam's parents fighting, maybe the day doesn't turn out so perfect for Jim and Pam. I'm hoping that Michael manages to do one of his classic moves where he acts like an ass all day but then ends up saying something really sweet--like his "never ever ever ever give up" to Jim in "Booze Cruise." (And I'm hoping Pam's mom tells a story about a certain late-night phone call.)

Plus, they'll have to keep their biggest excitement--their ~~daughter~~ baby--under wraps all day, and that's gotta be hard. I mean, you can't tell me that the show's going to spend the entire Jim and Pam wedding episode without some precious acknowledgment of the fact that Halpert's marrying his ~~daughter's~~ child's mother, can you?

Enter act five: Jim and Pam sneak out of their own wedding reception to go on a little boat ride. They don't actually get married on the boat, I bet, they're just still in their wedding clothes because they snuck out of the reception. And this is where things get almost too precious to handle. They're alone (except for obviously the camera crew), they're married, and they can talk about how happy they are to be starting their family, etc. etc. etc. Romantic, precious, my dog perplexed at seeing me lose my shit...

That's my take on how all of this could fit together. They could also pull a Marshall and Lily and get married quietly before the ceremony. Only glitches there are that (A) Um, Marshall and Lily did that recently and (B) Jim and Pam obviously get super-drenched on the boat, yet in the shots from the church, they look fresh as spring meadow. So that doesn't seem very likely.

I'd say it was just an early start to their honeymoon, but they're in the same clothes, so it's gotta be the same day.

So, yeah, I'm betting it's a reception skip-out. Did I convince you?

The Evolution of the Epic Bromance

2009-08-27T11:46:00.016-04:00

This post will focus on something which is not quite shipping in the romantic sense, even though the concepts share a lot of the same characteristics: I speak here of the televisual "bromance". As most of you reading this will probably be girls, I assume that we're all familiar with girl-friendships (hos over bros, y'all! Holler!), and enjoy seeing and identifying with these on TV (eg. Peyton and Brooke from One Tree Hill, or Maria and Liz from Roswell). As for relationships on TV I'm sure we all wish we could identify, and spend a lot of time trying and failing to make life imitate art – Jack Shephards just don't grow on trees, damn it! But when it comes to m/m friendships (or relationships for that matter), we don't really have a lot of experience or understanding of how these work in real life. Men can have beautiful friendships but they usually remain a mystery to us women because of those damn sexual politics. That's right, I just used that phrase. What TV can offer us in this case then, is an exclusive fly-on-the-wall glimpse at boy dynamics. It's true that sometimes all we see is delusional women's interpretation of how male friendships should work (see: all fanfiction in the world), but it's none the less fascinating to us. It's why your boyfriend steals your Cosmo (and thinks you don’t notice): we'll never understand the opposite sex, and thus it fascinates us, and those on-screen male friendships help satisfy that need for understanding.

But look no further: in this blog I'll investigate the idea of this so-called bromance! I'll look at a number of prominent examples and use them to discuss different aspects of this idea, and maybe discuss sexual politics some more. You know... for the lulz.

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Let's start by looking at some specific examples with actual brothers. Haha, like I would ever pass up an opportunity to discuss the Winchester boys, so I'll start there:

Sam and Dean Winchester – Supernatural
"All I'm saying, Sammy, all I'm saying is that you're my weak spot, and I'm yours." – Dean, 3x16 'No Rest for the Wicked'

I thought I'd start with these guys rather than beat around the bush with it, because the Winchesters pretty much define the epic bromance as we know it. Supernatural revolves around the relationship between Sam and Dean, and everything they hunt, everyone they save, somehow reflects something the brothers are struggling with, whether it be the boy they meet who is trying to save his little brother, or the spirit of a little girl who haunts her now elderly sister's family because she is lonely. It's underscored time and time again in the show that all the brothers have is each other, and they would literally rather die than be apart. There's no white picket fences in these guys' futures, no chance of them settling down with a pretty girl each and only seeing each other for Christmas and Thanksgiving, their bond is far too all-encompassing for that. And we eat this stuff up, because there's nothing more attractive to us romantic suckers than a guy who can not only show compassion for his girl but for his fellow man (for any guys reading: that's the key, btw. You're welcome), and because Sam and Dean are brothers they can do so without it having any romantic undertones. As far as canon goes, the need to assure the audience of the platonic nature of their relationship never arises because duh, they're related, and this "excuse" allows the writers and actors to go all out emotionally. It's interesting to note that this show is primarily written by men (though my sources tell me they tend to leave the big emotional scenes for Sera Gamble), and of course the actors are the ones who really bring out the intensity in the scenes written for them. It's delicious for us girls to get to watch these guys be so close, and without having to worry about love triangles or the usual shipper problems, because it will always be Sam and Dean, no question about it.

In fact, the actors themselves are so invested in the Sam/Dean dynamic that in the episode where they had to act indifferent to each other, What is and What Should Never Be (2x20), Eric Kripke says in the commentary that they struggled massively with the material, both telling him that the brotherly bond was so instrumental in tying them together that it scared them to watch it absolve and not being able to play off each other like they usually did. That's an epic relationship if I ever saw one.

Nathan and Lucas Scott – One Tree Hill
"Just playing walkie-talkies with my brother." – Lucas, 6x14 'A Hand to Take Hold of the Scene'

I'll use Nathan and Lucas as my second example of a literal bromance, because I think their dynamic is significantly different from Sam and Dean's. Unlike Supernatural, One Tree Hill is a show primarily focused on romance and complicated love triangles, and the Nathan/Lucas relationship is allowed to slowly develop and be cemented in the background. But that doesn't make it any less adorable, and only intensifies the squee-level of the scenes they actually do get together, like the walkie-talkie scene depicted above. Romantic relationships are great but on television their milestones are usually limited to: the first kiss, the breakup, the reconciliation, the other man/woman, the engagement, the marriage, the pregnancy and the birth. Of course those epic ships we all love so much tend to feature more heavy angst because it adds that extra depth and raises the stakes (Jate, I'm looking at you), but in a show like One Tree Hill it's all relatively straight forward. Lucas and Nathan, however, are more complicated because of the rivalry between them instigated by their father, Nathan's growing disconnection from his parents and relationship with Lucas' best friend Haley, Lucas' relationship with Nathan's ex-girlfriend Peyton, and the usual ABC of growing up. Especially in season 1 the conflict between the two brothers was a central part of the show dynamic. Like a ship that starts out hating each other, we wish for these guys to have their epic throwdown and then bonding session, but it has to come slow and steady, and One Tree Hill delivered. Nathan and Lucas succeeded where Keith and Dan failed, and it tugged at our heartstrings.

The ultimate resolution for these non-ships is usually a hug. In a ship it would be a kiss, and really the difference in the happiness these moments bring us is not that great. We just want the characters we love to be happy and together, in whichever way we choose to interpret that word.

Joey and Chandler – Friends
"All right, look! If this is just a big joke to you, then forget about it, all right?! This means something to me! And if it doesn't mean anything to you, then you should get out of there, otherwise you're just an idiot in a box!" – Joey, 4x08 'TOW Chandler in a Box'

I've discussed the close relationships between brothers – but when the characters are not brothers, the lines get a little blurry. I almost left these guys off my list but bumped them up over McDreamy and McSteamy, because, it's Joey and Chan! J and C! J-Man and Channie (6x02)! These guys defined awkward best-friend 4eva male relationships for the comedic generation. A lot of the humor in the Joey/Chandler relationship stemmed from the homosexual undertones and their "girly" way of being friends (i.e. they actually shared their feelings). Their friendship sometimes strayed into ambiguous territory, but it was always done with a laugh: the most significant moment (in my opinion; there were a lot) to show this is when they get the chick and get into a very domestic argument parodying parentage:

Joey: Well, anyway, I got to go change, I'm ah, meeting some of the cast for drinks.
Chandler: Excuse me?
Joey: What?
Chandler: I stayed home from work today while you were at rehearsal so somebody could be here with our chick!
Joey: Hey! Who was up from 2 o'clock this morning until 5 o'clock this morning trying to get her back to sleep?
Chandler: You don't think I get up when you get up?
Joey: Ohh, here it comes.
Chandler: Yes, here it comes! I'm stuck here all day, and then you come in and spend two seconds with us and then expect to go off gallivanting with your friends?! Well I don't think so mister!
Joey: Hey! I need to relax, okay? I was working all day!
Chandler: And you don't think taking care of our chick is work?
Joey: That's not what I said. Okay, I just meant...
Chandler: I know what you meant! (pause) You notice that ever since we got this chick, we've been fighting a lot more than we used to?
Joey: I don't know, maybe we weren't ready to have a chick.
(3x21 'TOW The Chick and the Duck')

Before Chandler and Monica got together (and to some extent after, as well), there was a lot of writing for Joey and Chandler as if they were a couple. Besides from Rachel and Ross they were probably the two friends who were closest and spent the most time together, and while for the most time the "relationship" insinuations were comically exaggerated, there was a lot of truth in it as well. Looking at Friends realistically is always a challenge, but if we try, we see two guys in a New York apartment, unlucky/unhappy in love and with their careers, who at the end of the day can come home to each other and take a deep breath because it's safe, and easy, and free of complications. That's what characterizes a true friendship and what makes life a little bit easier for us all, and it's nice to see that guys can also have it. For me personally I take a lot of comfort in the Chandler/Joey friendship because it reminds me of my own best friends, and it's always depressing to see those guys who only hang out to get wasted or play video games. Joey and Chandler's friendship is one for the ages, and it's influenced the televisual bromances that followed – for example Seth/Ryan, which I will discuss below.

Seth and Ryan – The O.C.
"Alright, come on buddy, get ready. For some old-fashioned Seth/Ryan Time." – Seth, 3x04 'The Last Waltz'

Like One Tree Hill, The O.C. is primarily about romance, But Ryan and Seth's relationship did a lot to define the show, and came to symbolize The O.C.'s over-arching theme: the merging of two worlds (Chino and The O.C., rich and poor, tough and touchy-feely, etc).

Seth and Ryan are like the odd couple, with their different backgrounds and personalities it shouldn't be possible for them to be friends, and yet they are. They have very funny, sarcastic scenes and their jokes are usually focused on Ryan's masculinity and Seth's lack of same. Like with Chandler and Joey, Ryan and Seth's close bond is sometimes indirectly (more or less) addressed in the show:

Seth (walking in on Ryan changing): Hey! Oh... sorry. I'm surprised that hasn't happened before. Not saying I'm disappointed it hasn't happened before just saying the mathematical probability of...
Ryan: Yeah. Crying during chick flicks... walking in on me getting dressed...
Seth: Yeah, what's your point? Okay, I'm not seeing what you're getting at. Do you work out?
Ryan: Not really.
Seth: Cool, me neither. I'm gonna go watch some hockey.
(1x24 'The Proposal')

But nothing is ever actually insinuated between them, and why would it be? Sure, there are Seth/Ryan shippers out there and by all means go for it, but it's always been clear in the show that Seth and Summer belonged together and that Ryan, at least, never considered a relationship with a man. We love this friendship because it functions as a Constant among all the Ryan-Marissa-Seth-Summer-Anna-Taylor-Luke-Oliver-Trey-Johnny-Kaitlin-blablablablaaaah drama. We never have to worry about it, or read anything into it, it's nice and relaxing, and I know I personally always get that "aaahhhh" feeling settling into some good old-fashioned Seth/Ryan time. It's just them. Nothing to get worked up about here.

Hurley and Charlie – Lost
"Just remember... I love you man." – Charlie. "Yeah whatever, I love you too." – Hurley, 3x21 'Greatest Hits'

My last example is one which might not have gotten a lot of screen time in which to develop, but it was one of those rare treats for Lost fans whenever these guys got to bond and remove us from all the seriousness for a while. This relationship was maybe not as epic in its entirety, but they sure had their squeeful moments! My top three are:

3. 3x10 'Tricia Tanaka is Dead'

Bromances on TV are often used for comedic effect, but sometimes the funny is interwoven with seriousness and melancholy, and that’s when it gets really great, in my opinion. This moment from the car is great. "Let's look death in the face and say, whatever dude."

2. 3x21 'Greatest Hits'

The last hug. Charlie has to make sure Hurley doesn't come along, because he's set in the sacrifice he has to make. It's heartbreaking, and poignant, and even if Charlie is doing this for Claire and Aaron it doesn't make his love for Hurley any less beautiful.

1. 1x07 'The Moth'

When Charlie and Jack emerge from the cave we get the romantic payoff when Kate hugs Jack, but the male fans (and us) also get their resolution, which they can enjoy without feeling emasculated, in the Hurley/Charlie hug followed by "Dude, you rock!" (It happens a while into the video but it's worth waiting for, just for the Jate hug!)

(But... what about the actual romances?)

Before we finish, there's a dilemma I want to address which inevitably comes up when you discuss bromances in this fashion: On one hand, you want to distance yourself from the hormone-ridden fangirls who over-sexualise everything from Shrek to Harry Potter, and thus you try to completely ignore the supposed homoeroticism in these relationships (as I have done so far)... yet on the other hand, is it really such a stretch to imagine that Ryan and Seth or Chandler and Joey could have been romantically involved? The intense feelings are certainly already there, and sometimes I wonder if the only reason shows choose not to go there is because of the political statement it would make, and the creators are, ironically, trying to avoid the drama. It's true that not every relationship is romantic, but the problem with television is that romance is always a factor in m/f relationships. Hence the triangles and quadrangles of doom. Torchwood intensifies this by making Captain Jack bisexual (above shown making out with James Marsters), but here it's just another extreme because he just has sex with everyone. Television shows simplify the world, and included in this we sadly have our token ethnicities, our token gays, our token white trash, etc. I suppose if there is a morale to this post it is that it would be nice once in a while to see some complexity and variation in television show relationships. Let's see a bromance that actually develops into a romance without the fuss and fanfare (see Willow and Tara in Buffy – they got it right). Let's see a friendship between a boy and a girl which is never anything else (Haley and Lucas from OTH is the best example I can think of here). Show the world that these issues are not such a big deal, and then move on.

In conclusion:

We all have our soft spots, and male friendships is one of mine. I'm not one of those people who need to make everything into romance, and in the cases I have mentioned above I think the relationships are as amazing as they are because romance plays no part in them. From Supernatural, where the brothers' relationship is the core of the whole show, to Friends where everything even remotely serious needs to be turned into a joke somehow, these bromances have touched me, and I hope you feel the same way. What is your favorite on-screen bromance? Let me know in the comments, and thanks for reading!

*Screen cap credits: http://www.oth-caps.com/, http://www.screencap-paradise.com/, http://magicalscreencaps.com/, http://lost-media.com/, http://friendscafe.org/
**And special thanks to Aly for looking over this post for me and helping me find a good Churley quote!

Fall Season 2009: The Mentalist

2009-08-25T02:09:00.003-04:00

It only makes sense after lavishing over Lie To Me that I admit to watching The Mentalist, too. After all, it films at the WB, I work at the WB; oh yes, my loyalty streak runs true.

I know you’ve all heard of this show; let’s count how many times CBS can call it the number one new show of the season. Is it deserved? Is there some unique story or chemistry between the characters that pushes it ahead of the crowd? Is it really just Psych on a primetime network?

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Excels At: Entertainment. There’s no doubt that the show is fun. You have your characters and their quirky relationships, the silly antics, and that gosh darn formulaic crime drama merriment. The show isn’t particularly deep, but in this case, it’s not a bad thing. The humor is enjoyable, the plotlines simple but engaging, and when facing another season full of angst-ridden, convoluted, mystery-driven dramas, this show hits good time breather out of the park.

Also, the cast is just pretty. And Simon Baker is apparently something akin to Australian gold dust, so let’s just say that the show is very easy on the eyes.

Needs Improvement: Really, the show is a ratings success, so I doubt there will be any shaking up of this formula. I don’t have much hope for the storylines getting less obvious, so my next request... character backstories.

It’s not all fun and games in The Mentalist; lead character Patrick Jane has a torturous background that seriously rivals that of most characters on TV today. Wife and daughter murdered by a serial killer Patrick was unable to capture when helping the police as a pretend psychic? Ouch. I know the Red John storyline is going to continue for a long while, but we really only learn anything about Patrick when it revolves around this plot, and the show and his personality do quite a 180 at those times. I think that’s the point, but some more continuity, some more building of character arcs would help this show build a solid base and will stand it apart from the average feel-good dramas.

And side note: for a show that plays on the word “Red” for its episode names, you’d think the Red John plot would be utilized a whole lot more.

Interpersonal Dynamics: Patrick Jane/Teresa Lisbon – it’s going to be slow to develop, but you know there’s something there already. He trusts her, which says a lot since he doesn’t speak about the Red John incident to just anyone, and she has a pretty difficult past of her own. Step one for bonding!

Wayne Rigsby/Grace Van Pelt – probably most people’s favorite couple. It’s adorable, it’s sweet, she’s innocent, he’s protective, and you know Grace is going to fall for him (to hell with regulations!) soon.

Kimball Cho – my new TV boyfriend; thus, the ‘ship is him and me. It’s awesome. There will be websites, you just wait. But really, you’ll find it hard not to love the juvie and military record backstory combined with the deadpan delivery style and dry wit.

The characters together never fail to amuse, and as a cast, they seem to actually like working with one another, and that very nicely translates as such on screen.

Particularly Notable: Not the best, nor my favorite episode, but “Red Handed” is one of those episodes that I remember often. Seeing Patrick at work in a casino with his observation skills, and the team’s interactions during the whole gift giving/returning scenes is great and a good example of the light-hearted humor that makes this show a winner.

Pay Attention To: The Red John plotline; a second season means more interaction, more development, and some more insight into Patrick’s past. Rigsby/Van Pelt; you know it’s going to happen.

Overall Score: 3.5 Stars.

Season Two premiers in the U.S. on September 24th.

Fall Season 2009: Lie To Me

2009-08-24T01:09:00.003-04:00

Maybe you heard of the show; it carried itself through its 13 episode freshman season quietly, had a wee bit of help here and there from the FOX promotions department, and tried its best to make up for its mid-season start as a show that suddenly seemed a little like a copycat, and was thoroughly trounced in numbers by The Mentalist anyway.

But it you’ve been keeping an eye on the TV (and really, why wouldn’t you? Have you seen all the delicious pre-season commercials that have started?), you may have noticed that FOX is making more of an effort to support this little show and give it the attention it rightfully deserves. So if you’ve toyed with the idea of catching up or just adding it to the TiVo list this season, or if you’re already a Liar at heart (okay, I tried. Prepare to see Lie To Me Fan written out a lot), here’s what you need to know:

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Excels At: Seriously complex personal histories and deeply layered interpersonal relationships. The Mentalist, this show is not! Divorce, suicide, drug addiction, honesty, lies, cheating, spying, abuse – look what we discovered about our main cast in just 13 episodes. Then put all that backstory into their interactions with one another and it is genius.

And I put that first so you got all excited and didn’t back away going boo and boring at the science of the show. The Lightman Group, to which our esteemed group of characters belongs, helps solve crimes through (and pulling directly from Wikipedia here because the words are just so pretty) “reaching the truth through applied psychology: interpreting microexpressions through the Facial Action Coding System, and body language.” While Temperance Brennan may not approve of me referring to it as a “science”, exactly how do I learn how to do this? Imagine the possibilities. And yes, it’s as cool as it sounds. There are set-ups to trap, tests to engage, and voice and video analyses that I’d like to employ on my next date.

Needs Improvement: It can be cookie-cutter as a procedural drama; there are times when the ending is as clear as a smog-free Los Angeles day. And if you don’t know LA, a smog-free day isn’t common, but still, some more focus on the storyline and how it utilizes the science, versus “here’s a cool new psychology trick; how do we tell a story around it?” will be helpful as we move into season two. Also, more humor! There was some nice witty charm to the start of the season that definitely took a turn to angst and drama as the season progressed. I love the heart wrenching, but more personality quirks (give Dr. Foster junk food; she’s hilarious!) and light-hearted moments are on my wish list this season.

Interpersonal Dynamics: I’ll own up to being a Cal Lightman/Gillian Foster fan right now because it’s likely 9/10ths of what I’ll eventually write about this show will focus on them. Come on, he calls her “love”. But really, co-workers who trust each other implicitly, but who also try to keep their personal lives separate from one another because they know there’s something between the two of them that, if acknowledged or acted upon, could destroy their working relationship? Recipe for success!

Then there’s the Cal Lightman/Ria Torres dynamic. Teacher and protégée, but Cal is used to being followed and to being right, and Ria is stubborn and emotional. Some of the tensest moments in the season were the two of them butting heads.

And finally, Ria Torres/Eli Loker. Since he never lies, we know he has a thing for Ria. Will it evolve? Will he be able to climb up from the demotion to unpaid intern for his folly last year?

Even the guest stars – Cal’s ex-wife, his daughter, Gillian’s husband, Mekhi Phifer as an FBI agent – help add to the crazy dynamic between the main characters. Definitely the show’s strength is in its characters, their personalities, and their interactions.

Particularly Notable: I’d choose a Cal/Gillian moment, but when the storyline is tight, everything falls into place beautifully. “Blinded”, the second to last episode in the season, was a wonderfully set up and told story. When they (and we) all realize that Cal has been running a “long con”, and that all of them were pawns in his master strategy, it’s a particularly awesome moment. And it makes the scene between Cal/Gillian, after she’s been attacked, when he tells her that continuing this case isn’t worth it, so much more meaningful.

Pay Attention To: The new show runner. Shawn Ryan (creator and writer of The Unit and The Shield) takes over for season two. Expect more character development, harsh realism, and controversy.

Overall Score: 4 Stars.

Season Two premiers in the U.S. on September 28th.

The Office: Game On, Folks, It's Wedding Time

2009-08-23T09:59:00.007-04:00

If you were standing outside my apartment right now, you'd think there was a small animal dying in here. In reality, it's just me having a freakout on this lovely Sunday morning.

Under the cut are some spoilerific Office pictures.

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Jim and Pam are getting married, y'all!

Between Jim's fancy new haircut and Pam's barely-there baby bump, I am just about dead with all of the excitement. (Also, what's going on with Jim's tie? Did he have a run-in with Abbey Bartlet?)

Aside from the fact that it's been a long time since I've been this excited about a TV wedding, I'm thrilled to see that the show seems to be doing this the right way. I was frustrated last year by the lack of Jim and Pam storylines, and it seemed that a lot of viewers translated the inattention paid to them as "Jam is boring." Now, though, it appears the show is putting the focus on the Halperts, with both their wedding and the February birth of their ~~daughter~~ baby constituting hour-long episodes. And with the fourth episode of the season chronicling their wedding day, we're told to expect to meet more of their family members, which I love.

Okay, side note. There's nothing weirder than seeing the wedding of the people you love and not recognizing anyone in the bridal party. But it's also strange when they have only their coworkers in their wedding. Like, seriously? Angela and Hodgins don't have any friends or family outside of the lab?

So it's nice to see that The Office might try to find a middle ground by introducing us to Jim's parents (you know, the ones with the bad taste in clown art) and other assorted relatives.

I spent a good part of my evening last night on the phone with Leigh, lamenting how shows are so reluctant to resolve "will they or won't they" that they wait far too long to get the OTP together. I get frustrated when ninety-minute movies don't have epilogues; when I've invested years into a television show and its respective relationships, they need to pay off in spades, not in a series-finale conclusion that ultimately doesn't resolve anything (*coughFriendscough*).

And really, God bless The Office for showing that it can be done. We're starting season six of The Office, and I think it's safe to assume it'll probably go to seven. We've got at least two more seasons to go, and yet the central couple is about to get married and have a baby. We're going to get to see their ~~daughter~~ child as a toddler. (Oh my God, you guys, imagine Jim playing pat-a-cake with a baby.)

And it really does sound like they're going to put the spotlight back on Jim and Pam this year. Paul Lieberstein specifically said, "Jim's cool and he's fun, but he's a goof-off, not a super-hard worker and not very ambitious. He's been very adolescent. He's going to try to step up. We feel like Jim is a big part of what we're focusing on this year."

Of all the fall premieres, this is the one I'm most looking forward to. I can't wait to see what's coming for this couple, can't wait to see their precious little ~~daughter~~ baby ... God, I can't even wait see a freaking promo, for crying out loud.

Grey's Anatomy: Beating a Dead George With a Stick

2009-08-21T11:42:00.004-04:00

Oh, come on!

That's what I said when the credits rolled on last season's Grey's Anatomy finale, and months later, I'm still saying it.

Going into last year's finale, we had some idea of what was going to happen. We knew Katherine Heigl and T.R. Knight were both on the verge of quitting, and we knew their characters would find themselves on the verge of dying.

And while the finale itself was pretty good--ignoring, of course, Derek and Meredith's entire plotline--my mind was boggled by the cliffhanger. Because it's not really a cliffhanger when you can see it coming from about six miles away...and when you can say the second it fades to black how it's going to be resolved.

There's Problem #1: It was obvious.

More...We flat-out said here, here, here, and here that there was no way that Izzie was going to die.

The other thing is--of course they weren't going to go the whole summer without the staffing shakeup being leaked. And it wasn't even so much leaked as Shonda Rhimes talked about it publicly and T.R. Knight was on the damn cover of Entertainment Weekly. There's your Problem #2: The "cliffhanger" was further de-cliffhangered by the INEVITABLY OUT-IN-THE-WORLD news that Knight was peacing out of Grey's and Heigl was staying.

Obviously, not everyone who watches Grey's scours the internet for scoop, but, I mean, this was pretty much everywhere, no? Mainstream magazines, TV news ... I think you'd be hard-pressed to find a viewer who hadn't heard about this.

So then riddle me this.

Why is this promo all about OMGWHO'SGONNADIE?

Now, I'm not saying that the show should gloss over George's death just because we all know how it's going to turn out. It absolutely shouldn't do that. But given the fact that the result here is basically a forgone conclusion, they should account for that. Like, don't show promos trying to get us excited about OMGWHO'SGONNADIE? Guys, we know George is going to die.

And don't make us spend the entire premiere with more flatline-and-rally BS. Guys, we know Izzie's going to live.

Instead of making us wait another couple episodes for the conclusion we've all known was coming since before the finale even aired, why not try and show us what else you can do with this story, instead of manufacturing more tension that NOBODY is going to feel tense about? It's ridiculous.

Angst as OTProgress, Or Why Everybody Needs to Take a Chill Pill

2009-08-20T00:21:00.027-04:00

If you’ve been following this blog for a while now, you’ve probably noticed that there’s a general trend in what several of us here crave from our favorite couples. If you’re new to us, though (or if you just haven’t been paying that much attention), we want to let you in on a slightly twisted secret:

We’re whores for angst.

Pretty much everyone here thrives on a good argument or drawn-out arc of episodes in which our OTPs are climbing uphill against a constant flood of bad news, slamming doors, and tears. Brennan's dating Booth's boss and gets in a fight with Angela about it? SCORE. Some of us enjoy it far more than the rest (Mae and Caroline, to get specific), but generally it’s an aspect of ‘shipping we all crave.

And do you know why? It’s because nine times out of ten (read: unless John Wells is running the show), angst and fighting results in cute reunion fluff and even the occasional dose of makeup sex.

We’d never really thought about taking this fandom truth and turning it into a blog topic until this very moment. But Mae and Enigma happen to be completely immersed in a faction of OTP ‘shipping that's been repeatedly misled and sent to the back-burner numerous times in recent years, so, even though things are ridiculously happy in their world these days, there are still a few people who tend to be notoriously trigger-happy when it comes to preaching doom & gloom at the slightest hint of relationship angst. The Chase/Cameron fans of House are totally lovable, but they've been pushed around for far too long and could honestly use a Valium most days with how easily some of them panic and determine the end is near.

(We're allowed to poke fun at them since, you know, we are them.)

When Ausiello came out with his spoiler column last night, it included this juicy little tidbit – which directly resulted in the publishing of this entry:

Question: I’m so happy Cameron and Chase are getting their old jobs back on House. Got any more scoop about them?
Ausiello: Their first significant fight as a married couple will take place in episode 4. And it’s not going to be pretty.

We immediately flew into a celebratory dance of anticipation and joy because, you guys, fighting is awesome! Non-pretty fighting is even better! Throw in the fact that we’re dealing with a married couple and you’ve pretty much landed yourself in a guaranteed arc of tasty, angsty goodness that will eventually resolve in the fluffiest of ways.

Very quickly, though, we thought of the trigger-happy and easily-panicked fangirls out there in the world - not just in House-verse, but scattered across all fandoms far and wide. And it occurred to us that we really need to put together a distinct list of examples proving just why it is that angst = awesome.

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Alias' Sydney and Vaughn were great at the angst, but then again they were one of those "guarantee" couples you could pretty much ship without fear of failure because there was simply no way they weren't ending up together. They did a lot of fighting in the early days before they ever hooked up romantically, but some of our favorite moments from their post-"Phase One" days come from the second half of Season Two. In "A Dark Turn," the CIA calls Syd in for a secret meeting and it turns out Vaughn's under investigation as a possible double-agent and traitor to his country. She's torn between trusting her heart and fearing the worst, and it causes some major angst between the new lovers. But when she decides to trust him rather than risk their relationship by turning him into a mark, we're rewarded with the joy of hearing Sydney admit to a superior that Vaughn is someone she truly loves.

Season Two's "Countdown" also brought us a great argument after Sydney lies to Vaughn about a very important investigation, and they continuously disagree over how to handle the situation at work. But the end of the episode finds them on a bench in Griffith Park with ice cream. She admits to him that she lied, then tells him she's never had anyone to disappoint until he came along. It's all very sweet and perfect, and they walk away through the park arm in arm.

Mae's favorite angst from Alias, though, happens to be an entire season long. Sydney's two-year disappearance and Vaughn's subsequent marriage to a skanky whore in the meantime makes Season Three one of the most epically angsty and painful years of television on record. When Sydney confronts Vaughn in "The Two," screaming at him for giving up on their love and telling him how ripped apart she is without him, it leads to a bittersweet conversation one episode later where Vaughn tells her all about what happened to him after she supposedly died--he drank himself into a constant stupor, held conversations with her hallucinated ghost, and pretty much fell off the face of the planet all because, as he says, "I was so in love with you, it nearly killed me." The entire season carries on with more and more of the same, and it's just so achingly beautiful to watch because, holy shit, angst is delicious when it delivers such a pretty outcome in the end.

We love that scene. "I am horrible, Vaughn, I am ripped apart." Holy crap, it's delicious.

Even if we think on the lighter side, some of the best Jam on The Office this year was found in "The Surplus," where Jim and Pam disagreed on how Michael should spend the surplus. They're on opposite sides because they’re stubborn as hell, and they like anything that’s going to break up the monotony of the day—not because they don’t love each other. It shows how similar they are, how complementary their personalities are, that they both throw themselves into their little project (convincing Michael to spend the money their way), and that, ultimately, they both have a sense of humor about their jobs. We know that at the end of the day, they’re going to be just fine. What the show accomplished in showing this disagreement was to demonstrate how these two don’t have to always be on the same page—and even when they don’t get along perfectly, they’re still one of the strongest couples on television.

Another example of a angst-gone-good comes from Leigh's favorite show, Gilmore Girls. After finding a copy of "You Deserve Love" in Jess' bag, Lorelai can't help but poke fun at it to Luke. Instead of mocking something she thought to be so pathetically mockable, he's quick on the defensive. Why? Because it was originally his. The same book that caused him to "see her face" one episode earlier. Luke tears off a mini-rant as Lorelai looks on like a deer in the headlights and we're left thinking -- "wh-wh-what the fuck was that?" However, a few minutes later, we find out that none of that angst was meant to actually exist as angst -- it was all just a means to a squee-filled, jam-your-face-in-your-pillow type of ending. The episode ends up showing us another adorable byproduct of arguing/ranting -- the slow dance. Complete with touching and smiling and giggling and bodies oh-so-slowly getting closer. You can't help but love the fight after you know it ends up like that!

But really, let's get down to some super-serious business now.

If there’s any couple on television who knows how to fight, it’s Jack and Kate. From the gun case to the search party for Michael to the disintegration of their romantic relationship, these two have had some epic battles. (You want me to name some more? How about Kate ruining Jack’s chances to get “rescued” on the submarine? How about Jack refusing to save Tiny Ben? Jack sneaking the dynamite into his own pack? Jack finding out Kate’s a murderer? Jack wanting to blow up the island?)

Yeah, they fight. A lot.

One of their most epic fights is in season two, and the tension lingers for more than six episodes. Jack tells Kate not to come along on an A-Mission, and rather than follow his orders (which weren’t really his to make, even if he did have a point), Kate trails along behind the team and ends up getting kidnapped by The Others, who use her to threaten Jack, Locke, and Sawyer into giving up their weapons. Major bummer. Things continue to be awkward between Jack and Kate for a while, as they both sit in their respective corners and sulk. But what’s great is how they make up—Jack invites her along on a later mission to track down The Others, because knowing what happened last time, he knows they won’t try to kidnap her.

Now, Jack and Kate are (as usual) an outlier in our discussion, because unlike most of their counterparts here, they’re not together for most of these fights. So why is the angsting okay, when it seems to only drive them further apart? When their making up doesn’t involve crying and sexing and kissing in the rain? Because in the end, it’s making them stronger. They fight because they’re trying to survive on the island—together. And when they disagree on how to best achieve that goal of Not Dying, the arguments serve to highlight their differences, their stubbornness, and their individual trust issues. At the beginning, their arguments were almost entirely about trust, but as it’s progressed, they’ve become much deeper, about who they are as people: Is Jack a goody-goody? Is Kate a babystealer? Is Jack a child murderer? And if we say that at the end of the day, Jim and Pam and Chase and Cameron and Luke and Lorelai go home to each other, well, at the end of the day, Jack and Kate survive together. We fully expect them to spend the rest of their days arguing about who gets to go track down the Hostiles and who has to stay back at the caves with the kids, and we love them for it.

Now, we can’t do a list about angst and not jump headfirst into a discussion of these next two ill-fated lovers. Mind you, when we said at the beginning that all angst leads to fluff with the exception of couples under the thumb of John Wells, this is exactly what we meant. ER's Carter and Abby didn’t come out the other side of their final angst tunnel with their romance intact, but they sure did give us lots of beautiful examples of angst-as-love along the way.

In “Walk Like a Man,” Carter has just found out that Abby, a beleaguered alcoholic, has been drinking again behind his back. Things get pretty messy. Until they get adorable again. This epic fight of epicness, from the very beginning of their courtship, was largely about trust and respect and the strength of their new relationship. The fight culminates in Carter leaving Abby alone on the El platform, but is resolved at the end of the episode. And as they stand together on her stoop, smiling, we’re reminded that these are two really effed-up people who are going to have to work really hard to make this relationship function. But they’re willing to try, and that’s what matters. Well, at least for now.

Later, their fights get even more intense. Eric, Abby’s younger brother, has been missing for several days after his small plane disappeared off radar. Carter was scuba diving in Belize with his buddy when Abby called him with the news. By the time he got home on the red-eye, she was passed out drunk in bed. He takes care of her all day while she works her shift and searches for her brother, but when Eric is finally found alive and well, she disappears. This is what happens when her boyfriend finally tracks her down:

Yeah, see? So much fighting--and not about trivial stuff, y'all--and yet he still shuts down the conversation with an impromptu (and not entirely romantic) proposal.

Really, the fact that it all falls apart again and again – and never ultimately resolves – just one episode later is why you should never let John Wells touch your OTPs. They really did have some epically good angst-and-make-up situations in their three and a half seasons as love interests, and their breakdown is more of a testament to Wells's ineptitude and Noah Wyle's abandonment than to the failure of our laws of fighting.

And finally, to bring it back around to where this post even began, let's take a look back at House's Chase and Cameron. What’s interesting about fans being paranoid when these two fight is that, well, they have a very distinct and well-established pattern about it. Put them in a fight over Chase wanting a real relationship and Cameron resenting him for ruining their no-strings-attached arrangement, and you end up with Chase gifting her flowers in the locker room and making her blush. Want to spend several episodes pitting them against each other as he consistently tells her he likes her and she repeatedly turns him down? No problem, they’ll just end up kissing on his doorstep when all is said and done. And the cycle remains the same with every major tiff they have.

They spent the entirety of "The Itch" building toward a confrontation that left most people wondering if they were going to end up breaking up after all, but then - following their pattern step for step - Cameron comes around in the end and sets things right. You can't really hate on the angst when it's what gets you shit-eating grins and Chase playfully tossing a thong across the bedroom, see? But as last season wound down, they found themselves playing the angst game yet again:

See? The cycle continues. And this time, they actually did break up, you guys! That's some really bad angst. That was worth wondering if it would actually be okay. Of course it was, though, because this is what they do. When you can go from a bad fight/ultimate breakup to a marriage proposal in a matter of about fifteen minutes, you've got a pretty good track record with angst on your hands.

The final (and most ridiculous, yet strongest) example in this pile comes into play just two episodes after the engagement. Wedding plans get crushed under the weight of miscommunication and... well, sperm, but even with their wedding called off and everything seemingly crashing down around them, the angst serves its purpose to bring about the greatest payoff of them all:

The wedding was super presh and squeeful, and now these two newlyweds are approaching a new season where their first massive blowout awaits them. The beauty of it all? Now they can face more angst than ever before and yet it's barely even a legitimate threat anymore. Once vows have been exchanged, absolutely anything is resolvable until the minute a divorce is finalized. Married couples are far more immune to angst than everyone else -- and trust us, a blog surrounding that theory will be surfacing soon enough.

In conclusion, however, we feel it is important to make one thing very, very clear. Angsting is NOT will-they-or-won't-they. (Case in point: Bones has rarely had legitimate angst, but has thrived for four seasons on Booth and Brennan's sexual tension.) Angsting is trying to make the relationship survive, coming right up to the edge of doom, and then stepping back, realizing once and for all that they don't want to break up, they don't want to fall off the cliff.

And we beg of you to remember, they almost always step back.

Why You Are Not Yet Watching Supernatural (and 5 Reasons Why You Should Be)

2009-08-19T16:31:00.037-04:00

Hey everyone! I'm Selina and I'll be joining the girls here at Chaos, yay! I am a loyal follower of this blog but I noticed that no one is talking about Supernatural! Having recently started watching this show myself, I thought I'd do my part to rectify that a little bit and hopefully peak a few readers' interest in the best show you're not yet watching! In this post I'm going to introduce you to Supernatural, tell you why your reasons for not watching this show are completely unfounded, and then give you the top five reasons why you should give it a go!

Jared Padalecki and Jensen Ackles. Why. So. Seriousss?

Considering the copious amount of television I watch and the variety of genres I enjoy, there is a number of popular TV series that I don't watch, that I've never even given a chance: some I just haven't gotten around to, like Bones (I know, scandalous!), and some I just don’t really feel like watching, for whatever reasons. It's very hypocritical of me considering how hard I judge those people who refuse to watch Lost, but really, we've all got those shows that we know nothing about except that we won't like them so why even bother giving them a try? Supernatural used to fall into the latter category for me, and I remember meeting my housemate for the first time last year – she was also a big Heroes fan see, and doesn’t watch Lost, so I was already skeptical of her taste – and smiling benignly at the Sam Winchester poster on her wall... and then doing a double take because next to that was a Dean Winchester poster, as in, "Omfg-it’s-Jensen-Ackles-from-Dark-Angel zomg I luuuuurve him!!11" (as I am pretty sure was my exact reaction). But I never gave it much thought beyond that, I just drooled a bit on her poster and left.

The thing about me, though? I’m a pleaser. I'm not even kidding, I really, desperately want people to like me. So after a while of me and my housemate not really clicking, despite both being real-life fangirls and her being the first person I’d ever met who actually used the words "flist" and "fanfiction" in sentences, I borrowed some Supernatural from her in the hopes that we’d have something to talk about. And also partially to avoid studying for my exam. Heh.

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So I watched the first episode... and was notably underwhelmed. Uh, okay, they fought a random demon. Come on, it was fine for Buffy and The X-Files, but we're in a post-Lost era now! Monsters of the week are not really going to cut it for me anymore. But whatever, it's not like I had anything better to do (ahem) so I kept watching. It has to be said that while I appreciate the first season more now after having caught up, the show doesn't really get amazing until about halfway through season 2, when it writers also realized that weekly monsters wouldn't cut it, and started making the show funny. I’m not a big gore fan, was never able to watch The X-Files, but after four seasons of Supernatural I'm pretty much immune to it. I watch for the relationship of the brothers, the snarky, self-referential humor (the highlights being the episode commenting on the writers' strike where two random guys run around with a video camera looking for ghosts and calling themselves the "Ghostfacers", and when Sam and Dean discover that they have fans on the Internet – it sounds stupid but it’s hysterically funny, I kid you not), I respect the show because it's not afraid to poke fun at itself but is still good enough to turn from hilarious to poignant and heartbreaking in a moment.

Supernatural isn't the most popular, or highest rated show out there. The cast consists of two guys, Jared Padalecki and Jensen Ackles, who play brothers, so really there is no chance of an ongoing, developing romance, which I'm guessing is a BIG turn-off for most of you. Well, let me tell you something: romance? After watching half a season of this show you will wish ill fortune on all the houses of those darn women who come in between the Winchester brothers! Seriously, the story goes that Jensen and Jared met while shooting the Pilot, are now best friends, share a house and never fight. And it's really paid off in terms of the show because I've never seen two actors with better chemistry, and I've never cared more about a relationship that had nothing to do with romance whatsoever (Wincest, you say? Ew, I say). Trust me, you will want those ladies OFF your boys, and the brothers' bond will only grow stronger as the show progresses.

So to sum up: I understand your hesitance, if you don't like scary and you got your fill of fruitless shipping with The X-Files (ok, it bore a little fruit. Like, a grape... and a baby), but you will not be disappointed in this case. Here’s my top five reasons why you should join me in my Supernatural frenzy and catch up before the fifth and possibly final season, beginning September 2009:

It’s official: everyone wants a taste of Jensen Ackles.
(SPN 4x05 "Monster Movie")
5. The specials: Starting around the second half of season two, Supernatural begins to introduce a lot of "special" episodes: the writers' strike episode, the black and white "classical horror" episode, the Hollywood episode, the Christmas episode, the flashback, the time travel... et cetera. This is good because while the ongoing storyline is really interesting (especially in seasons 3 and 4) there's only so many original places they can go with that, but within the scope of one episode Eric Kripke (the creator) can go all out bat shizzle crazy, with amazing results that are not only cool on their own but actually matter in terms of character development (the drive to return the characters to status quo and therefore resorting to overlooking any development is generally a prevalent fault in the use of standalone episodes on television), and then blame it on some demon and kill it off, resolving the problem. There's a giant teddy bear, guys. Few shows can get away with stuff like that. It speaks to the brilliance of the writing.

"OMG Sam was lying, I so do not have moobs!"
(SPN 4x01 "Lazarus Rising")
4. The shirtlessness: Hahaha. No harm in saying what is definitely a key reason for Supernatural’s dedicated fanbase (I like to compare them to the Twihards). Jensen is supernaturally attractive, pun totally intended, and Jared Padalecki is pretty damn fine too, and while there's not a lot of shipping going on in the show, that doesn't stop them showing off their um, assets, and you can probably manage to forgive the girls that get in their pants along the way because they allow us to see some different sides of our beloved boys. There's a reason why the audience of such a serious, shipping-free, dark action/adventure show is 99% female. Just saying.

Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki pour their hearts and souls into this show every single week, and all most people care about is their six-packs. It just breaks your hearts, doesn't it boys?
(SPN 2x02 "Everybody Loves a Clown")
3. The acting: It's funny that on this relatively narrow-reaching, unknown show, so much effort is just poured into its production every week, from everyone who's involved, but most notably (for the viewers at least) the actors. In most shows you'll have a decent sized cast to share the workload and the hours, but on Supernatural we've only got two regular cast members who are in almost every scene - every single week. And yet they manage to deliver amazing, funny, believable, heartbreaking performances. Every single week. You don't always see a great deal of consistency in- and attention being paid to characterization in shows like these, which you expect to focus on the action and monsters-of-the-week, yet Sam and Dean are both believable, multi-layered, understandable, surprising, relatable characters... a lot of shows could take a leaf out of SPN's book here! They are both incredible actors but Jensen Ackles especially stands out: his crying scenes are just top notch, and the range of emotions he can express on screen just make him so fully realized. You feel how much Dean cares for his brother, and how far he will go to protect him. Jared Padalecki is especially good at the humorous scenes, though Jensen's got some classic moments as well, but it's when they work together that they both shine the brightest. They just could not have picked two actors who worked better together, and the fact that they've gone so long and worked so much and yet the atmosphere is (as far as we know) still great on set just proves that fact.

There are precious few hugs between the brothers through the series, because when it finally happens it has to be ultimately cathartic for both the characters and the audience.
(SPN 3x11 "Mystery Spot")
2. The "Wincest": Ew, no, not like that. I understand why some people wish that the two guys weren't brothers, because if they weren't the show could in theory set up a pretty epic romance, but the fact is that they are brothers. Full stop. And I don't wish that they weren't, because if you ignore the crazy people that want them to be together-together, the "love story" that Supernatural tells is one of the most beautiful that's ever been told on television and this is largely due to the fact that they are already family. They're all each other have. "You're my weak spot, and I'm yours," Dean tells Sam. They can only get away with sappy stuff like this because they're brothers and a romance is completely out of the question, and I'm glad because it's just so cute! Watching them fight evil together, looking out for each other, sacrificing themselves to save each other because they know they couldn't go on alone, that's what kept me watching through the first season (which is pretty generic, but trust me when I tell you to stick it out), and which just continues to pull at my heartstrings every episode. Their bond is so convincing, and it’s probably partially because the actors have gotten so close off-screen, and partially because of how well they are able to channel their characters, but whatever the reason it's really made the show what it is, and is one of the main reasons the show has made such a positive impression on me.

"We know you've had it hard during the crippling writers' strike [but] who needs writers when you've got guys like us? Our team faced horrible horrors to bring you the footage that will change your world forever. So strap in for the scariest hour in the history of television."
(SPN 3x13 "Ghostfacers")
1. The satire: This is my top personal reason why Supernatural stands out among the masses of shows I've watched. See, sci-fi/fantasy shows tend to take themselves hella seriously, and in most cases they need to in order to keep the audience invested in storylines that are completely implausible to begin with, and that's fine but when we're talking about B-list shows we tend to get a lot of recycled storylines, developments and character stereotypes. Take teen shows for example – they've got five or six different ways they can develop the story: pregnancy, death, appearance of unknown/missing relative, marriage, time jump, etc., and they always use them all! It's so repetitive. But see, Supernatural is not above clichés of its genre, and doesn't try to disguise something as original but rather goes to great lengths to point out the recycling. Supernatural doesn't claim to be anything more than what it is, and therein lies its brilliance. Supernatural knows it resembles The X-Files, and is not above referring to Sam and Dean as Mulder and Scully. It knows that there are certain gay connotations about the two main characters, and is not above commenting on this ("Don't they know we're brothers?!" "That doesn't seem to matter to them.") within the show. One of my favorite moments of the entire series is in season two when Sam and Dean are looking into a mystery in Hollywood and they go through the CW lot, and as they pass the Gilmore Girls set, they cut to Sam/Jared Padalecki's face (Jared used to star on Gilmore Girls) looking uncomfortable. These little moments that just say "we know this is crazy, but just go with us and enjoy it" are very precious and I feel very flattered as an audience member whenever I catch one of their little hint hint wink winks... if you’re a Lost fan, I'm sure this will appeal to you too. Like Geronimo Jackson posters or the numbers on the hatch door, only incorporated into the script.

There. Are. No. Words.
(SPN season 1 gag reel)
Also, an honorable mention goes to the bloopers. Not really a part of the show, but Supernatural has the funniest bloopers I have ever seen – yes, better than the Alias bloopers! If you're still not convinced after reading this, find the season 1 bloopers on YouTube (I don't think they're too spoilery), and see how great an atmosphere there is on the set, it'll make you want to watch the show just cause of the positive energy that went into creating it!

And there you have it. Thank you for giving me a chance to convince you to give up your precious time on yet another TV series (as I'm sure you've all got plenty as it is), and I'm very excited to be with you here on Chaos - and for single-handedly establishing the little "Supernatural" link that now appears in the link to the right! So did I convince you? Have you already seen the show? Or do you share in the "CW snobbery", which I had no idea even existed before today?! Let me know what you think!

(Credit to Screencap-Paradise for the episode images used in this post.)

Lost: Speculation Roundup, Summer '09

2009-08-19T10:24:00.004-04:00

As we head into the fall season, with spoilers and speculation for most shows spilling in at rapid rates, one show remains as elusive as ever when it comes to grasping the future. Even with a much-YouTubed Comic-Con panel, two frustrating almost-ARGs, and dozens of interviews with death-wishing Matthew Fox, Lost fans have little to go on so far.

Mind you, the cast isn't even back on set yet, so this silence is to be expected. But this season is particularly befuddling, because it feels like we have nothing to do. Think about the end of season three and the questions that arose from the famous "snake in the mailbox." How did Jack and Kate get rescued? Did anybody else get rescued? Who's at home wondering where Kate is? Who's in the coffin? What made Jack lose it? Is Christian Shephard alive?

I mean, I ~~probably could have~~ spent the entire hiatus just musing on the possibility of that little Jaby sitting at home missing his mom.

The end of season four brought more complicated questions, involving the island's disappearance, Ben's turning of the frozen donkey wheel, and Locke's apparent death. However, our fandom seemed capable of handling that. We'd spent the whole season being prepared for that finale, through Ben's appearance in Tunisia in "The Shape of Things to Come," the flashforwards revealing the lives of the Oceanic Six post-island, and the previous year's coffin question.

This year, though, and I know I don't speak for everyone, but there seems to be a feeling of a collective okay, huh? Because every question we could possibly ask: Is Juliet dead or alive? What about Sayid? Where did Ilana come from and why does she know so much? relies upon one bigger question:

Did Jack's plan work?

And I, at least, feel pretty incapable of answering that question, especially since, after five years with these guys, I'm sure Darlton will come up with something totally different than what I'm thinking. So today we'll round up the Lost news and discuss a popular theory on the future of the show, one that seems like the most likely explanation and yet one that is almost undoubtedly wrong.

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Here's what we know. Some folks are returning. Elizabeth Mitchell as Juliet will be around for a few episodes (with most of them being at the beginning of the season). Ian Somerhalder (Boone), Jeremy Davies (Faraday), and Dominic Monaghan (Charlie) will all spend time on the island. Emilie de Ravin (Claire) is returning for the entire season. And there are rumors floating around about short-term returns for both Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje (Mr. Eko) and Greg Grunberg (The Pilot).

We know that the first episode of the season is called "LA X."

And that's pretty much it.

The producers have answered a few questions about season six, and have reassured fans that the last five years of the timeline will not be irrelevant, likely ruling out an explicit "reset," wherein Oceanic 815 lands safely in Los Angeles and everyone goes on as usual. (Damon Lindelof also said flat-out that season six will take place on the island.)

That said, this idea of a reset does have interesting implications. And we've been teased about it so much that to just say "Jack was wrong" would feel like a cheat, too. There's part of me that really does want to see a reset, to see what would have happened to these people without the island. Would Charlie have continued to use? Would Sawyer have continued to con his way across the country? And of course, if you're me ... would Jack and Kate live up to JJ Abrams's original assessment that those two know each other "within the context of a universal recognition"?

There are elements of a reset that would be awesome. There's the potential to seal the deal on the ever-present element of fate in Lost. If Jack and Kate (or anyone, for that matter) feel a pull to each other even after the reset, well, then that's going to force them to deal with this concept of destiny.

So I think what a lot of people--myself included--are expecting is something a little in between. How about an episode (or, most likely, the entirety of the two-part premiere) of course correction? Imagine it playing out like "Flashes Before Your Eyes," with the plane landing safely at LAX and watching everyone go on about their lives. Kate goes to jail, Jack buries his father, Charlie struggles to find another fix, Claire gives Aaron up for adoption...

And yet... It would be monumentally epic to have Jack see footage of Kate on the news and feel so compelled by it as to go to the prison and meet her. (Similar to how Faraday was moved to tears by the footage of the 815 wreckage in "Confirmed Dead.") And we know what has to happen here, too--

Charlie, Boone, Eko, the pilot--everyone who died on the island will die in the reset, too, as the universe course corrects. Our guys, perhaps with the help of Faraday, who, of course, was not on Oceanic 815, begin to put the pieces together and realize what's going on. Things get weirder and weirder in reset world, until finally--THUD--the universe rights itself and everybody wakes up on the island.

Couple of problems with this:

1. It doesn't account for Claire. Could the course correction jolt her out of whatever state she was in when last we saw her, hanging out with her dad in the cabin?

2. It doesn't account for Desmond. This reset would theoretically throw Desmond back to the island. Is that possible? How would that affect the story?

3. We still haven't addressed the fact that it was 1977. If they course correct back to the island, would they wake up in '77 or would they rejoin the rest of the team in this millennium?

4. We still don't know what's to come of Juliet and Sayid. Dead? Alive? Somewhere ambiguously in-between?

It's enough to make a person say, Screw it, speculating on this crap isn't even worth it. Hopefully with the cast going back to work soon, Dark's sources will start gearing up again, too, and we'll get more information soon. Surely by the time the premiere rolls around, we'll have a better idea of where this thing is headed.

There's also this casting tidbit, from Ausiello--

The first official piece of new casting for Lost’s sixth and final season has arrived — and it’s surprisingly detailed. Team Darlton is looking for an actor in his mid 30s to late 50s to play…
Lennon: Scruffy, edgy, charismatic, and slightly stir-crazy, Lennon can be deferential when it’s called for.

He’s the spokesperson/translator for the president of a foreign corporation. He’s a wily negotiator, and far more powerful than his lowly position would seem to indicate.

Now, Lost has been known to use business-type descriptions for their more mythological characters. Jacob's nemesis was described in the original casting notice as a "corporate raider looking to take over his next company." So I think it's less likely that he works for Widmore or Paik, which have been popular suggestions, and more likely that he's a Hostile or an Other or a member of the Black Rock crew. Definitely sounds like it could potentially be related to ye olde Jacob vs. Esau.

But how does that relate to this concept of the reset? In his last moments, Jacob assured Non-Locke and Ben that "they're coming," and I took that to mean that our heroes, those touched by Jacob, are on their way. Would a reset make this easier? Harder? Impossible?

This is so difficult!

Share your thoughts in the comments ... I could use some help here.

Summer Advice #3: Kitchen Confidential

2009-08-18T18:46:00.009-04:00

As part of someone else’s series on shows to catch up on this summer, I offer you another casualty of FOX’s inexplicable business model: "Kitchen Confidential.”

A short-lived half-hour sitcom starring Bradley Cooper and based on chef Anthony Bourdain’s memoir of the same title, the show followed the life of the oh-so-cleverly named Jack Bourdain, head chef at the newly opened NYC hotspot Nolita and a recovering addict. The main idea was to show the comedy and drama (but mostly comedy) behind the scenes at a restaurant, from supplier problems (like when an order of rabbit meat shows up with the rabbits still alive) to coworker issues (do people prefer desserts or fish, and what will that question do to your staff dynamic?) to things that really have very little to do with food (such as inadvertently sleeping with your boss’s mistress).

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Now, I am probably the only person who cannot stand Bradley Cooper in just about any incarnation. I’m sure he’s a perfectly nice person in life, but I just don’t like him. And I’m not a fan of Jack, either, who seems to have to work very hard at staying sober, but not much else.

What does make “Kitchen Confidential” well worth watching is the rest of the cast. (Well, not Bonnie Sommerville, either—her waitress Mimi is one of the singular biggest pains-in-the-ass I’ve voluntarily watched on network television. But everyone else does.)

Nicholas Brendan as Seth, the pastry guy, tops my list for reasons to watch—I actually followed big, sweet, ol’ Xander from “Buffy” to this show. And yes, he’s basically playing the same character in a totally different setting, but that doesn’t make it bad—quite the contrary. He’s sweet, relatable, and fun to watch. And a little dose of our favorite Everyman, for people who miss said Mr. Harris. He’s also the happy medium between Stephen the British bahstahd and poor little Jimmy—manly enough by normal standards but plenty emotional and sensitive as need be. And he’s not above the wacky dating tactics that only work in sitcoms, to usually entertaining effect.

John Frances Daley gets major points here, too. I like him quite a bit in “Bones”—and I think that show does a better job of using him as the “kid” in a grown-up’s workspace—but, like Brendan with Xander, he’s good at this character. As Jimmy, the n00b chef from Mormon country, he’s worshipful of Jack and a bit of a moral compass-cum-punching bag for the rest, all while maintaining his good cheer. And I think he ends up with the one functional romantic relationship on the show, too. His cluelessness in many cases is overdone—but “Kitchen Confidential” is charming enough on the whole that it’s fun to watch, not painful.

John Cho is also in this, as Teddy, the fish guy. Disclaimer here: I’ve never seen “Harold and Kumar.” Either of them. Sorry, universe. So this was my first outing with John Cho, and I have to say I enjoyed it, to the point that I spent both showings of “Star Trek” reminding myself that he was called Sulu over there. But the guy is funny! And snarky, and you do come out with a new respect for people who make fish, as well as an odd subculture surrounding sushi and tourists. He and Nicholas Brendan don’t get used nearly enough, which is why their fish-versus-cake battle royal is one of my more memorable plots.

The other regular and recurring characters—Jack’s sous chef and bed buddy Stephen, the other waiters (a flamboyant man named Cameron and a chick who looks like Eva Longoria), and especially the incredibly dumb blonde but terribly sweet hostess Tanya and Jack’s sometime-romantic interest and fellow chef Becky—all have their moments, too. Becky’s the hot, tough chick chef that the guys all drool over, but when she takes things a step too far, you end up forgiving her along with everyone else. Tanya’s an airhead, but endearingly so—watch for the moment when she innocently comments that she’s going commando.

The guest stars, though, are a real treat. Frank Langella has a recurring role as Pino, Nolita’s owner. The inimitable Morena Baccarain shows up as an ill-advised one-night-stand of Jack’s (and why is it that outside of “Firefly” she’s always playing the chick with the crazy eyes?), as does P.J. from “My Boys.” Michael Vartan pops up as an obnoxious French chef…I could go on, but I’m technically at work at the moment and probably shouldn’t be fact-checking on IMDb.

I admit, I can find things to complain about with most of the characters and episodes. This show wasn’t like, say, “Arrested Development” or “Firefly” where you watch the aired episodes and cannot possibly fathom what the network executives were thinking to axe something so creative and unique and perfect and brilliant. As far as I know, this show never got the determined, passionate fan following that those two shows or Family Guy did (which probably helped with the whole cancellation thing), so it’s safe to say we shouldn’t expect any motion picture follow-ups or revivals, although it is out on DVD, so who knows?

But it was fun and diverting, which is in many cases just what a sitcom should be. The food was fun to look at (to a point—but then again, I’m a longtime vegetarian), and I suppose most people not me would say the same about Bradley Cooper. Anything with Xander Harris and Dr. Sweets on the regular cast roster is fine by me. Plus, it was clever and funny, and unlike a lot of sitcoms, had a sweet little heart in there somewhere. It’s also available in all its 13-episode glory on Hulu, so take a few hours before Labor Day and check it out!

One Girl. Three Scenes. Millions of Tears.

2009-08-17T23:15:00.004-04:00

I'm not a crier when it comes to movies and TV. I'm just not. Grey's can bring those sappy scenes all they want, but I'm sorry, Izzie Stevens, your cancer wedding isn't going to make me cry. Much-beloved characters can have epic deaths, but I'm sorry, Charlie Pace, you're the only one covered in water.

I'm just not a crier.

It takes something really special--and usually not traditionally cathartic--to get me to weep. Weddings, meh. Deaths, double meh. The tried and true moments that would make my college roommate all teary (like, OMG, sorry to sell her down the river here, but the end of Bones's "Santa in the Slush" was very emotional in my apartment) have no effect on me when it comes to tears.

So what does get me?

The following three scenes, any time. (Yep, I just tested them. They still work.) They're not all sad, they're all very sweet, and they're all about daughters, something I didn't recognize until just now. Huh. Anyway, watch these for a smile, a few touching moments, and apparently a glimpse into my psyche.

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In The West Wing's season four premiere, "20 Hours in America," Josh, Toby, and Donna get left behind by the motorcade in Indiana. As they try to make their way back to Washington, they encounter a variety of hilarious setbacks, including pesky timezone issues, a cornfield, and Amy Adams. At one point, Josh and Toby bide their time by throwing rocks at a barrel. They turn it into a game: whoever misses first must, for the rest of the day, introduce himself with a clarification that "I work at the White House." Spoiler alert: Toby loses. At the end of the two-parter, they're still in Indiana, where they find themselves in a hotel bar, and in the company of a man named Matt Kelly. Here's what happens:

Like I said, Grey's doesn't usually make me cry the way that it does for other people. In fact, I can remember only one time when I really lost it. And it's this scene, from season two's "Name of the Game." Alex has been working with this patient, Beatrice, all day. She's a mom who's rapidly dying, but lying to her sullen-but-sweet-underneath teenage daughter. Alex gets pissed, and calls his patient out on it, begging her to tell her daughter the truth.

Unfortunately, I don't have it clipped out, but it's right here and it starts at 34:25. It's worth it, and Megavideo buffers fast!

Okay, saved the best for last. Friday Night Lights season three was basically one big old weepfest for me (shocker), but this scene is so memorable to me. For those of you who don't watch the show (and you should be slapped in the face), Tyra is a girl trying to get herself out of small-town Texas. When we met her in season one, she was kind of trampy, didn't really do much, but as the years went on, she grew into herself and really started to dream big. At this point in the series, late season three's "A Hard Rain's Gonna Fall," she's trying to get into college. Now, for the most part, her family's not real helpful. Dad's gone, and her mom and sister are pretty content where they are, hooking up with bums (Mom), working at the Landing Strip (sister Mindy), and planning the world's tackiest wedding. But every once in a while, somebody's gonna surprise you. Seriously, watch this:

Bones: Premiere Promo Partytime

2009-08-17T14:55:00.000-04:00

It's finally mid-August, which means we're officially (give or take) five short weeks from the glorious start of yet another TV season. Spoilers are starting to slowly trickle out, but what's even more fun? Promos are finally airing again! Bones has already released several different variations promoting the September 17th premiere of it's fifth season, and, let's be honest - there's really not much else to do in response to them other than flail and squee.

Despite what all of us may or may not have felt about last season's shocking finale, it's looking as if season five is going to deliver exactly what's necessary to fix what's been broken. I personally really enjoyed the finale last season, but I was apathetic over almost every other episode that came before it. In my opinion, something needed to shift regardless of whether or not it was done to placate fans after the finale, and it's finally looking as though we're going to make some real progress.

Follow me behind the cut and we'll take a look at what's in store!

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The first truly exciting promo to come our way was little gem:

Booth is precious, you guys. Just precious. I can't help but giggle at his excitement and the sense of joy he exudes just at being back to work/around Brennan again. I find it not only funny but also really interesting that he's apparently lost certain minor details of his personality. He remembers who he is, everything about the people around him, how to do his job, etc - but the eccentricities that made him distinctly Booth, and the particular processes by which he used to approach work situations, have seemingly been lost. We hear from spoilers that he's no longer wearing his colorful socks (and the ties are back to boring black, too), and you can see from the promo that he's the one lacking total professionalism at crime scenes and having to be reminded of his own rules by Bones.

I really, really think I'm going to love the total shift that this season will bring. Booth and Brennan are going to be forced to almost get to know each other all over again in a sense, even though it's not as if he's actually forgotten anything about her. But he does remember what he felt for her in his "dream," and he's not going to have the easiest time maintaining the line that he himself drew all those years ago.

Add to that the fact that Cam is flat-out telling him he's in love with Brennan, which is another thing that I love about this show. Caroline used to say that Bones was great at hitting you over the head with exactly what messages it wanted you to pick up on, and the constant intervening into Booth/Brennan's relationship by both Cam and Angela (not to mention Sweets) is one of my favorite ways to be hit over the head. If Booth can't manage to admit it to himself, or at least out loud, then Cam will say it for him: he's in love with Dr. Brennan.

Thing is, as the next promo shows us, Booth doesn't actually have that much trouble admitting it out loud at all:

So Booth loves Brennan and tells her so, the Cyndi Lauper psychic is all up in their romantic/spiritual connection, Angela is sticking her nose into it again (yay!), and Booth/Bones are just generally adorable together at all times.

This is where it really gets fun, though. Booth admits to Brennan that he loves her, and that he's been wanting to tell her this since the moment he woke up. And then he almost immediately covers with his "...in an 'atta girl' kind of way" tag-on the second Brennan gives him her look of awkward discomfort and confusion. Plus, look at his face during that hug! I think the hug is my favorite part of the promo. He looks like he's simultaneously existing in both heaven and hell at that very moment, so happy to be holding her but so tortured that it can't be how he really wants it. Angela is surely correct in her claim that things are very, very awkward, and I think it's going to make it all the more delicious.

Can't you just imagine how much fun it's going to be? Booth, completely aware of his love for Brennan and longing to be with her, is going to force himself to fight against those feelings to keep from causing more tension in their partnership. But he can only fight it for so long, and Brennan is totally in denial anyway. The angst-to-fluff ratio is going to be outstanding, you guys! And it's my favorite type of angst, where they're not really fighting and falling apart -- they're just achingly struggling with warring emotions as they attempt to keep things platonic for even longer.

Me? I already love it. Who knows if it will end up going at all the way I hope it goes, but I'm extremely anxious to see it all unfold. I feel like this may be exactly the type of shift in their relationship that I was craving for last season. Things had gotten too "same plot, different week" with every passing episode, and I really felt like the show was losing sight of how to properly focus on angst/drama instead of their need to be goofy/comedic. I have high hopes for this plot to bring things back to an even balance all around, and I can't wait to get the journey started.

What are your thoughts on the promos and what they hint at for the new season? Do they give you hope and reignite your love for the show, or is the sting of the finale just too painful to move past?

(P.S. I have to point out how much I love the adorable David/Emily shot they keep using at the beginning and/or end of these promos. Seriously, y'all, those two are just ridiculous. But that's another blog for another day, perhaps.)

Scrubs: Reality & Storylines Collide? Yes, Please!

2009-08-16T21:08:00.006-04:00

First of all, let me just say that I am not actually two days behind on the news. I was out of town and incapable of instantly blogging my glee over this news, but better late than never, right?

As most of you have probably already heard, Scrubs star (or ex-star, I suppose) Sarah Chalke is officially pregnant.

Now, not only am I bouncy with joy simply because of my love of celebrity babies, but you have to admit -- the timing of this is absurdly perfect. Even though Chalke isn't officially part of the Scrubs cast anymore, she and Zach Braff (and others) are set to due several guest appearances during the remaining run of the show.

And maybe it's just me, but I personally think Chalke's new pregnancy just raised the bar for awesome guest spot appearance storylines so much higher.

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Before we do anything else, I think it's hugely important that we all rewatch the flash-forward sequence that aired at the end of Zach Braff's (and, really, Sarah Chalke's) final episode of last season -- because this is where it all starts perfectly coming together:

The first thing that's really important to notice is that neither JD nor Elliot is wearing a wedding ring during the pregnancy moments. In fact, they're not wearing them in any of the flash-forward moments at all until the actual scenes from their wedding. What this implies to me is that their precious baby girl comes along way before they actually walk down any aisle to make it official.

And considering that JD/Elliot had only been back together for less than an entire season by the time "My Finale" aired, that fits perfectly with Sarah Chalke being pregnant right now. If Elliot shows up pregnant in a guest spot early next season, we're on the perfect track toward fulfilling every exact detail of that flash-forward.

You know what else makes it all totally perfect? Carla was already pregnant with Baby Turk #2 when the season ended last year, and - oh yeah - Judy Reyes is currently pregnant right now, too. She's due in November, so the show could easily get in a scene or two of Carla showing off the immensely pregnant baby belly before Reyes actually gives birth. Plus, Carla & Turk's baby boy in that flash-forward is practically the same age as JD & Elliot's baby girl; they're no more than mere months apart, which again fits the timing of the actresses' pregnancies just splendidly.

I'm not really sure how they'd fulfill the whole Christmas gathering prophecy that includes both babies, as that'd be cutting it really close, but, really, this is TV and that's what time lapses are for, right? I'm not going to worry myself over that tiny detail, really. Besides, if Carla was already pregnant at the end of last season and her baby isn't that much bigger than Elliot's by Christmastime anyway, then it kind of follows that Elliot would have to be pregnant by now after all. Yay!

All in all, I'm giddy with excitement at the prospect of actually seeing that flash-forward fulfilled in real time. I realize that it doesn't matter all that much since the characters aren't even series regulars anymore, but it's not as if they'll never be in another episode ever again. They will be. And now we can all bounce around in anticipation of the adorable things that could easily happen during those guest spots.

You know, unless the writers/producers completely fail to take advantage of the awesome opportunity reality has presented them.

Which would just be, at least in my opinion, entirely irresponsible.

Gosh, I'm just so excited! There's nothing I love more than a good baby plot!

Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog: Everything You Ever Wanted

2009-08-09T21:59:00.003-04:00

Now that it's been nominated for an Emmy, I feel justified in writing a post about Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog.

A brief history:

During the 2007 Writers' Strike, Joss Whedon (the god of a television writer/director/producer/creator behind "Firefly" and "Buffy the Vampire Slayer") and various other awesome folks (and siblings) with whom he associates were bored and frustrated. And so they concocted a plan to create original content without the often-stifling input or restrictions of the studios and networks (see: "Firefly"). Once the product existed, it would be released in three parts, on the web for free, on a Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday of a week in mid- July. On Sunday, the videos would be taken down. From there, viewers could watch and re-watch it on Hulu, buy it from iTunes, or hold off until Christmas 2008, when an extras-loaded DVD would be released. In the process, they'd prove to the bigwigs that quality work could happen and turn a profit without them. (It probably helped that Joss Whedon has a uniquely dedicated fanbase that actually listened at his request not to bootleg it.)

"Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog" went live July 15, 2008--and it broke the Internet.

The creators essentially spent that day fixing their servers and such: they hadn't anticipated such heavy traffic. The problems were fixed by the time Act II arrived two days later, but the traffic continued to stream in. The DVD was a best-seller on Amazon.com, and it's been nominated for a number of web- and scifi-related awards (and won several). And now it's got an Emmy nod.

So what's the fuss about?

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"Dr. Horrible" follows the exploits of the eponymous Dr. Horrible in his quest to become a member of the Evil League of Evil. He has a sidekick, Moist; a love interest, Penny; and a nemesis, Captain Hammer. He's got a Freeze Ray (still a work in progress), a video blog detailing said exploits, and the drive to show Bad Horse (the ELE's leader) just how bad he can be.

What about the "Sing-Along" bit of the title, you ask? That's pretty self explanatory. While the words don't scroll across the bottom of the screen, the three acts feature about dozen incredibly catchy songs that after a listen or two you will be singing along with. These range from "My Freeze Ray," my personal favorite, which is bouncy and chipper, to the haunting finale, to rousing "Bad Horse Chorus," to others that draw on a range of inspirations and styles. As a fan of almost every musical thing out there (excluding "Oklahoma" but including the musical episodes of "Buffy," "Scrubs," and even "Even Stevens"), I'm primed to like this kind of thing no matter what, I admit. But Joss (who is also a big musical fan!) weaves the songs in wisely and well. That is to say, the songs are all key parts in the progression of the story and serve to move it forward--people don't break into song for no reason.

What else makes this stand out from the endless stream of online content? Well, for one, it's written by Whedon. Several Whedons, actually--Joss is the name but siblings Jed and Zack are in on this, too, as is Maurissa Tancheron, who's married to one of them (Jed?). For the uninitiated, this means a few things. Witty dialogue is a must--I won't spoiler the one-liner to end all one-liners at the end of Act II, but the trademark humor ("It's curtains for you, Dr. Horrible. Lacy, gently wafting curtains." "Bwah?") is there from start to finish. You also get a recognizable but utterly compelling world built for you--this one is basically like ours, but involves more song, and, apparently, the odd hero or supervillain. And you get a story that pulls you in from the get-go, makes you laugh, wrenches your heart a bit, and then demands to be experienced again. The finale is unforgettable; I've lost count of how many times I've seen this, and it still makes me gasp. (Fortunately, there's a sequel in the works.)

There's also a cast that rocks my socks so hard I can only wear sandals now. Dr. Horrible himself is played by the inimitable Neil Patrick Harris, and if you've ever seen an episode of "How I Met Your Mother," you know that's a recipe for, well, something legendary. He brings out Dr. Horrible's geeky bravado right alongside his alter ego's vulnerability. He also has a voice that is quite literally Broadway quality (see: recent revivals of "Assassins" and "Cabaret," for instance).

Captain Hammer is the equally inimitable Nathan Fillion, who sends up his "Big Damn Hero" character from Firefly (more on that in a later post) in the best way humanly possible. He also delivers some of the best lines of the piece with a mostly-straight face (including the one above and the aforementioned one to end them all).

The girl in question, Penny, comes to us courtesy of Felicia Day, of whom you've probably only heard if you watch her Internet series "The Guild" (and inspiration for this, both in concept and in marketing) or that one episode of "House." Or that Sears commercial. Anyway, Felicia does a lot with what could easily be a one-dimensional character, has a lovely singing voice, and a cute not-traditional-Hollywood look that fits well. Captain Hammer refers to it as a "cute nerdy thing--not my usual, but nice." I call it untapped talent; at least her costars have popular network shows to call their very own.

The supporting cast is fun as well--I won't get into detail, but Captain Hammer has groupies, with costumes. There's a newscaster with a frothy red beard. Moist (Simon Helberg from "The Big Bang Theory") has some unique superpowers. And more.

One last selling point: the DVD extras, most of which you can hunt down online if you don't want to spend the $10. These include "Commentary! The Musical"--exactly what it sounds like, but about seven times funnier than you'd expect. I hum those songs as much as the ones from the actual soundtrack. The ten winners of the Evil League of Evil application video contest are included, too--hold out for Tur-Mohel, the Calamitous Orphan, and L'Enfant Terrible (those are all available on YouTube).

There's also the more run-of-the-mill making-of featurettes and a regular commentary track, both of which are funny and enlightening even if you're decently versed on the backstory. (For the record, I've seen Joss speak in person, and he is actually that clever and funny off the cuff.)

Stay tuned for the sequel. All we know right now is that it exists, and Nathan Fillion says he knows the title and expects awesomeness. In the meantime, you can watch the original on Hulu--and you should.

True Blood: The Ick Factor

2009-07-24T15:29:00.009-04:00

Ok, so we all know True Blood was a show about vampires and on HBO so there was going to be some nudity and nastiness. But, seriously this show has had moments that have gone above and beyond the ‘Ick’, or, as the French would say, ‘Eek.’

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#5 The Obligatory Jason Stackhouse Sex. I’m not above shameless male nudity but seriously, Jason Stackhouse PUT SOME CLOTHES ON AND KEEP IT IN YOUR PANTS! Ryan has an amazing body, but frankly the Jason porno show went from ‘Oooh la la’ to ‘Please not again.’ The final straw for me was when they put him in Old Grampa Joe Y-Fronts.

#4 Lafayette and the Hip Bone.This was just gross. The ripped off limb, the squelching sound, and what looked like rubbery bloody tubes of muscles and tendons. Put me right off spaghetti bolognese.

#3 Human Vibrators.No, I’m not talking about a girl’s best friend. I’m talking about some freaky messed-up human vibration. Liam’s (the vamp with the bald head and tattoos) flickering tongue –which you think might be a good thing until you actually see it- and Maryann’s quivering sex pose which was extra creepy when coupled with the quasi-underage-rape situation.

#2 Graveyard Sex.I’m expecting backlash for picking this scene, but all the way through all I could think was ‘Ooh, there’s going to be dirt where it’s going to be mighty uncomfortable’ and ‘I really need a shower.’

#1 The Kiss of Blood. Seriously ICK ICK ICK ICK ICK ICK! That was just plain UGH! It was just a whole mouth full of blood – so much blood it overfilled and ran down her neck. ICK ICK ICK.

An honourable mention: Pam’s poor pumps. How could Eric let her ruin her shoes like that?!

A New Fangirl

2009-07-23T09:10:00.006-04:00

Hey everybody, we have a new writer here, to cover some shows we don't usually talk much about! (She also has some interesting ship ideas that some of us around here are boggled by.) Click under the cut and check her out!

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Dollhouse: Ballard and Mellie, Boyd and Dr. Saunders, Victor and Sierra

Fringe: Peter and Astrid

Gossip Girl: Chuck and Blair

Grey's Anatomy: Alex and Izzie, Meredith and Derek, Mark and Callie, Christina and Owen, Nurse Olivia with someone - perhaps a new McSexy surgeon.

Heroes: HRG and Angela, Sylar and Elle, Peter and Elle

House: House and Cameron, House and Cuddy

One Tree Hill: Brooke and Lucas, Brooke and Julian, Nathan and Haley

Private Practice: Violet and Cooper, Violet and Pete

Smallville: Clark and Chloe, Tess and Oliver, Lex and Lionel

Bones: Booth and Brennan, Booth and Angela

Chuck: Chuck and Sarah, Chuck and Lisa (the sandwich girl played by Summer, oops Rachel Bilson)

And.... I think that's it. Feel free to boggle at some of these unorthodox ship pairings. What can I say? I love the underdog and am prepared to drown with ships that will never ever ever set sail.

My favourite ship of all time : Rhett Butler and Scarlett O'Hara. Be prepared for some serious gushing.

So I think that's all there is about me. For those that wanted to know.

Bones Starter Kit: Four Seasons of Storyline, One Season of Time

2009-07-10T22:37:00.008-04:00

It's summer, and it seems like everyone's in catch-up mode: we're finally get into series that we've so far missed. It's fun, but sometimes it gets a little daunting. Even though we here at Chaos in General are quick to recommend Bones to our fellow fangirls, catching up with this series means almost 100 hour-long episodes--that aren't available on Hulu.

So we've put together a "Starter Kit" of sorts. It's 24 episodes (plus a few assorted scenes) that contain basically everything you need to know about Bones for the fall. So if you're put off by the thought of spending the next two months glued to a computer screen scouring the internet for these episodes (and you're not like me and Mae, who caught up with the first three seasons in a matter of days), fear not. Here's what you need:

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Note: Links to clips are download links--they're totally safe and contain only the designated clip, I promise!

"Pilot"

We are introduced to a man and a woman, henceforth known as "partners." Bet Mulder never backed Scully up against a wall at the firing range.

"The Man on Death Row"

Here, the writers try to introduce a story arc. So rarely do they do this that it should be noted. Brennan kicks some serial killer ass and it is AWESOME.

"The Man in the Fallout Shelter"

It's lockdown, so B&B (and the rest of the squints--boo) are forced to spend Christmas together. Also, good Brennan backstory and we're introduced to the wonder that is Parker Booth.

"The Woman in the Garden"

You really just need the second-to-last scene. It's the first time Booth physically stands up for Brennan, and DAMN he brings it. I mean, whoa. That's hot. (Sorry, I can't find the clip. Anybody have it?) Note: This is the scene Mae used to get Leigh hooked on Bones. It worked.

"Two Bodies in the Lab"

Arguably the shippiest episode from season one, this episode shows B&B's relationship blossoming outside of work, whether it's watching movies at the hospital or (yes) dancing around to Foreigner. This is also their first rescue scene and it is awesome.

"The Soldier on the Grave"

Turns out, Booth's kind of fucked up. Good thing Bones is learning how to be there for him with just the touch of a hand.

"The Woman in Limbo"

Oh, right, and Brennan's not all that together either. Also, her name's not really Brennan WHAT.

"The Titan on the Track"

Goodbye, Goodman (very sad). Hello, Cam (very sad). She will later become an awesome HBIC, but for now, she appears to be supremely In The Way. And also kind of a bitch.

"The Blonde in the Game"

What? More story arc? Here, we return to the story of Howard Epps. Really, probably the most fascinating recurring murderer ever.

"The Girl with the Curl"

Just this scene. Because it shows how, even though Booth dabbled in a little Cam for a time, his heart never stopped belonging to Bones. Oh, and he thinks she's hawt.

"The Woman in the Sand"

Booth and Brennan's first annual undercover op--not to be missed. Highly amusing--and HOT. This episode also kicks off a much-beloved second-string OTP.

"Aliens in a Spaceship"

Important to the canon--this episode introduces The Gravedigger, a serial killer with a truly bizarre MO. (And, no, we still don't know what was in that letter.)

"Judas on a Pole"

In which we return to the ongoing saga of Brennan's family. She and Booth meet a priest who says he can shine some light on Brennan's past...and things get interesting.

"The Man in the Cell"

Epic and awesome, this episode features so many memorable (not to mention suspenseful) moments: Booth's terrible boyfriend behavior, Parker Booth, a visit to Sydney Bristow's carousel, and the creation of what will forever be known as The Line.

"The Killer in the Concrete"

Here, we turn the tables for a change--it's Booth who's in trouble and Brennan's going to have to use unorthodox methods to save him, including finding an unlikely ally in her search for her kidnapped partner.

"Stargazer in a Puddle"

In the second season finale, our second-stringers are getting married, but, as usual, it's Booth and Brennan who get the real moments. In a scene that takes place in a parking lot, Booth proves just how far he'll go to do right by Bones. (And this chivalry won't go unnoticed--by anyone.)

"The Widow's Son in the Windshield"

We pick up a short time later, with the introduction of another serial killer, one who'll prove to be the ultimate undoing of a much-beloved character. Also, Booth and Brennan share a very sweet (if woefully green-screened) moment at the end. With this episode, we begin the rarely-strayed-from format of ending every episode with a requisite Scene of Fluff. I'm not complaining. In fact, when episodes do not contain this scene (*coughDoctorintheDencough*), it feels incomplete.

"Death in the Saddle"

Booth explains the difference between sex and making love. His eyes make it obvious just who he'd like to practice with. This is the scene Mae used on me to get me hooked on Bones. And look, it's on YouTube!

"Mummy in the Maze"

Booth and Brennan's "undercover" episode for season three, this one's set on Halloween and, in addition to being a really creeptastic case, involves Booth and Brennan dressed up as a squint and Wonder Woman, respectively. Not only do the characters find each other almost irresistible, but the actors admitted on separate occasions that they found themselves attracted to each other during the filming for this episode. SOMUCHTENSION.

"The Knight on the Grid"

Another "Widow's Son" case, this one, arguably the best of season three, literally brings everything. You've got an awesomely terrifying case, Brennan Family drama, plenty of romance, Booth at the firing range, and also some really funny moments. (Try not to laugh when Brennan talks about how taking the silver skeleton to Bethesda.) I'll even forgive that this episode fails at bringing the End Scene of Fluffiness.

"The Santa in the Slush"

Caroline was feeling puckish. Enough said. (Oh, the End Scene of Fluffiness is ridiculously perfect--and involves Parker Booth.)

"The Baby in the Bough"

Sometimes Bones hits you over the head with a baseball bat. This is one of those times. Here, Booth and Brennan, in a series of unfortunate and diaper-related events, are forced to spend an entire episode taking care of an infant. The words "But you're the babydaddy" pass through Brennan's lips. Does nothing for the plot at ALL, but this episode is epic in its silliness.

"The Verdict in the Story

As pointed out in the comments, this episode is needed to give some much-needed closure to Brennan's family backstory. Also, epic hugs.

"The Wannabe in the Weeds"

You really just need this end scene, where Booth fulfills one of Brennan's childhood dreams. (And then seriously ruins her day.)

"The Pain in the Heart"

So contrived, so ridiculous, practically unforgivable from start to finish, but this episode does involve a hat that dispenses beer. And our guys solve the Widow's Son case. It's stupid. You can choose to blame the writing or the strike. I just choose to blame Hart Hanson, who I feel was responsible for both.

"The Man in the Outhouse"

Again, one scene (coincidentally, the End Scene of Fluffiness) is enough. After Bones's experiment with dating multiple men ends in disaster, Booth schools Brennan on love again, this time on a promise that there is someone out there that she's meant to spend the rest of her life with. And by "out there," he really means "right here." Just look at that eye contact!

"The Con Man in the Meth Lab"

We've temporarily figured out a lot of things in Brennan's family, but now we've got to deal with Booth's family drama, which, while not quite as unusual, does suck pretty hard. Here, we meet his brother, Jared, who's got some problems and who also has his eyes set on (wait for it) Temperance Brennan. Watch what happens when "Booth-Lite" makes a move on his brother's girl! (Hint: it ends with a six-minute End Scene of Fluffiness.)

"The Hero in the Hold"

While this episode did not live up to expectations (even those developed midway through the episode), it's still pretty epic and important. Gravedigger's back, and this time they've got Booth--and they gave him some meds. He is affected.

"The Cinderella in the Cardboard"

In this End Scene of Fluffiness, Brennan tells Booth that she wants to be able to love the way Booth loves. They drink scotch, sit close, and he promises her that she'll find that one day.

"Mayhem on a Cross"

In this whole thing, I haven't mentioned my Third-Favorite Bones Character (Maybe Second), Dr. Lance Sweets. I pretty much want to go into the Bones canon and marry Sweets. Here, we get some of his backstory and some delicious character development for Booth and Brennan. (Hint: there are tears.) This last scene solidifies the fact that B&B need babies, if solely for the reason that they would never lock her in the trunk of the car.

"Critic in the Cabernet"

Sometimes I pretend this was the season four finale. Brennan discovers she would like to have a baby (for an even dumber reason than "because I wouldn't lock her in the trunk of the car"), and convinces Booth to donate sperm. Of course, things don't go well, especially when Booth starts hallucinating Stewie from Family Guy. It's way more awesome than it sounds.

"The End in the Beginning"

The actual season four finale is just painful for me to watch, as it represents months of dashed hopes, misdirection, and out-and-out-lies. But you should watch it if you want to consider yourself caught up.

So there you have it. These twenty-four episodes and you'll be good to go for September 17. Join us then!