Bones loves anvils hard core.
Mistletoe kiss? Check.
Pretending to be married? Double-check.
Taking care of a baby? Pwned.
For those of you unfamiliar with the lingo, an anvil is a device (a quote, a scenario, a love triangle) used exclusively and obviously to advance another plot. Forcing Booth and Brennan to care for a baby was a convenient and heavy-handed way to spend an hour with the partners as Mom and Dad. Booth saying "Everything happens eventually" was a convenient and heavy-handed way to say that Booth and Brennan's hookup is going to happen eventually.
Some anvils are particularly prevalent in primetime television. I mean, really, how often in real life have you had to pretend to be married to one of your colleagues?
Bones likes to partake of as many anvils as possible. They use them often and the anvils land hard. But there are a few of these devices that they've yet to utilize--and we're wondering why.
Could this be the year that Bones crosses the last few off the list?
#1. The whole just-plain-sleeping together deal. One bed, two sides, but by morning they're allllll snuggly. We assume something similar happened in "Double Trouble in the Panhandle" (Cam even noted the single-bed situation in Buck and Wanda's trailer), but we've never actually seen this situation happen. And it seems like something that could actually make its way from the annals of fan fiction to the screen. Plus it'd be freaking adorable. You just know that Booth would be so good at spoony hands.
#2. Undercover in the suburbs. Duh. EVERYONE does this. Mulder and Scully, Sydney and Vaughn, Chuck and Sarah. If you're a government agent, it's what you do. It's a television rite of passage. I'm majorly crossing my fingers that Booth and Bones's yearly undercover op is to investigate a murder in the seedy underbelly of suburban America. Watch Bones pwn the obligatory barbeque/dinner party/cocktail party watch Booth like it a little too much. Then watch me die of squee.
#3. Real, legit formal dancing. COME ON. They've gotten close a couple of times before, including in "Hero in the Hold," where Booth and Brennan were due to a formal event where there would have inevitably been dancing. But yeah, they're really due for dressed-up dancing, complete with hands-holding, back-touching, twirling, whispers, and a decidedly heavy moment as they pull away. Would it be too much to ask for Booth and Brennan to have to go to a prom? High school murder?
#4. A solid locked-up-together situation. This is a weird one to ask for, because technically we have seen this a couple of times on Bones. There's the quarantine in "The Man in the Fallout Shelter" and there's the resonance chamber in "The Science in the Physicist," but never has this anvil been used for its primary purpose: to force feelings out in the open. Locking couples in small places, in elevators, or on rooftops can often force our folks to talk about things they've been thinking about for a long time. Bones should take an opportunity to do this properly.